OCR Text |
Show SOON THEY WILL NEED A MINISTER ... Love You, Adore You-Will You Divorce Me? . ... AND BEST MAN AT DIVORCE TRIALS By H. I. PHILLIPS lyrY HUSBAND AND I are part-ing part-ing on the friendliest terms. I am very sorry to say we have been parted for some time," said a charming star of the stage and screen the other day. The mood was that of numerous recent divorce di-vorce announcements. What's become be-come of the old-fashioned couple who used to part with the crash of pots and pans, mutual cries of "Sez you!" and a stern demand from the cops: "Make way for the wagon. They're both all cut up?" In Hollywood a husband announcing an-nouncing that he is through with his bride says, "she is a very fine person. I have the highest regard for her. We just agreed to disagree." A New York society gal, enduring matrimony for a couple of ' years, announces: "We are both very fond of each other." What goes? Away with these folk who announce an-nounce a separation in tones and manner of making known a decision deci-sion to cancel a magazine subscription sub-scription or change the brand of white shoe polish. Let's demand some harsh words, a few swings and a blow by blow of the fight leading up to the parting. Divorce has been a sufficinet blight on the social fabric without with-out this nonsense about it entailing en-tailing merely a slight drop in friendliness. It is getting routine rou-tine to read of marriages being busted up because he and she like each other so much! If matrimony must go on the rocks, let's cut the business of fitting the ship with loveseats and assigning a flock of harpists harp-ists to sit on the rocks and play "When We Come to the End of a Perfect Day," and "Dear Old Pal of Mine." What is civilization coming to, mates? There was a time when the marriage state was regarded as sufficiently binding to command a little respect and nothing to be smashed up witout a rousing battle, some broken furniture, a few shattered shat-tered window panes and mutual shrieks of "Oh, Yeah! I was warned about you three months before be-fore the wedding." You couldn't get a good lawyer to take the case if neither side had an arm in a sling. Not even a gossip reporter would credit a rumor of divorce proceeding pro-ceeding if the principals were still capable of exchanging tender looks. No court would go on with the hearing hear-ing if there were no dirty looks. No self-respceting neighborhood neighbor-hood would stand for a couple breaking up a home on the friendliest of terms, and a sweet "please don't get the Idea we dislike each other." It would regard such a mood as definitely definite-ly tougher on community mor als than If all the kids had seen him throw her from the second-story second-story window, and If what she said to him withered the leaves on the backyard maples. Parting on the friendliest of terms! The very thought is corroding. cor-roding. It cheapens marriage. You wish to break up your home? Gwan, get in there and do it right away! There should always be an excuse for divorce. YE GOTHAM BUGLE AND BANNER The picture of the year was Art Whitaker's recent flash of the Sonja Henie wedding showing the kids "under the tent" with expressions which painters strive to catch .... Sonja's new husband has failed in three marriage tries, but the skating star figures that if he keeps hold of her arm he can get the hang of it yet .... Attorney General McGrath has sued the A & P stores .... The Demo-, crats want those little bundle-wagons in the chain stores to carry the customers, cus-tomers, too .... Walt Disney has the screen rights to the life of Sigmund Freud, and F. X. Sancinati says the title may be "Who's A-Freud of the Big Bad Wolf Ernie Bevin left a tooth in America in memory of the British "bite" .... Broadway now has a sort of tip sheet on new shows with quotations on what it costs to get a share .... Whafre Rodgers & Ham-merstein Ham-merstein First Refunding Sixes selling fori' Joe's Star and Big Muddy won a daily double at $2,420 In Chicago recently. "I nearly had it," declared Shudda Haddlm today. "I was at the mutuels window when I changed my mind." A Peruvian mummy has been unwrapped un-wrapped at the Museum of Natural History. He is dry as dust and about 3,000 years old. At noon today, strange as it seems, neither party had nominated him for the presidency. |