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Show Spouse abuse myths covered By Clara Allen Vista Volunteer Spouse abuse is an insidious crime that silently effects 30-60 percent of all marriages. Many mythical excuses cloud our perceptions of the seriousness of this crime. In order to understand the nature of the crime and act to prevent it. we must explore some of the most common myths. Myth No. 1. It couldn't happen in my family, or in my neighborhood, because it only happens to the poor, the minorities, or the unemployed. The truth is that spouse abuse happens hap-pens in all families, in all neighborhoods, neigh-borhoods, among the rich, poor, young, old, professional, semiskilled and unemployed. No age, racial, religious or financial groups are exempt from spouse abuse. We might speculate that one of the causal factors of spouse abuse is the abusers inability to cope with stress constructively. Every group of people has a certain amount ol stress built in, and each group has a percentage per-centage of their members who are not able to cope with this stress, and many take it out on their spouse. High stress professional and blue collar stressful positions might be expected to have a higher percentage of spouse abusers among their ranks, and statistics show us this assumption is indeed true. These men are not failure types, unemployed men we would suspect of being violent and mean. These are successful, respected leaders in their fields. The battered woman may also be a college educated professional woman. Myth No. 2. Religion stops abuse. Religion does not stop or prevent abuse. Abusers are found among all religions and peoples of our valley. Again, abusers are found among the faithful, not so faithful and the atheists. Many of the clergy of our town are concerned about this problem among their congregation, and their concern, and efforts to help should be applauded by all. Sometimes, because of her basic lack of self esteem, and in an effort to prevent further abuse, the battered woman will search everywhere to find something; anything to help herself become a better, more perfect person. Some of these women turn to their religion, and become quite active in it in hopes they have found the thing to help them be that perfect wife and person. In listening to, loving and counseling with these women and their battering husbands, the clergy are filling a real need in our community. A coalition to aid battered women is being formed in this area. Our next meeting will be Sept. 11, 7:30 p.m. at the library. If you would like to know more about the coalition, or if you are a woman in stressful or beaten condition, call 789-5850 days, 789-5528 or 789-4888 nights. |