Show Substitutes Never Ne Toot By HERBERT KAUFMAN Nobody forges a paupers pauper's name Worthless things arent aren't counterfeited When a man mar writes a phony check its it's because he cant can't make good over his own signature But the check is still bad because it is still stin his All All' widely advertised goods are widely imitated But substitutes are always like their makers unable makers unable tomake to tomake make good on their own own account t 4 If they represented value they could be sold without f misrepresentation The original article is is sure sure to be better or it if it wouldn't be copied Theres There's no need to t try y anything which cant can't be sold on onUs its Us own w merits merit The manufacturer has already judged for you and found It it wanting If he could make as good hed he'd make make a a noise about out it Substitutes never toot I When hen a Balkan State tats Co Comes es in H Handy ridy I Anthony Barr Bair Ma MacGrath Grath who operated the novel conc conc- concession th thereabouts kept us aware that there was a handful of back yard I states freckling the southeast of Europe And then too the comic comicI I operas used to inform us of their existence But until re recently few h have wouldn't In fact tha have ve veI I strained our credulity to read that art enterprising investor had hadi i picked up one or two of em to set his son up in the king business I Now of course the street car conductor and the delicatessen clerk can reel off reams of information concerning Serbia Montenegro Montenegro Monte Monte- I. I I negro Rumania and Bulgaria The great war wa is teaching us lots of things things' and ana some funda funda- One of the lessons is that a little fellow comes in mightily useful in an emergency as the big empires are are r realizing to their cost Nations and individuals both find themselves in in situations where an humble friend cail can render priceless service Nobody can have the good goodwill will of too many people You never can tell when you'll need a little Balkan state of your own The e Laugh-Eaters Laugh E A fool scientist says that its it's possible to build a machine which will unset upset gravity but dont don't le let the notion upset yours It isn't safe to laugh taugh at cranks nowadays In the t twentieth century you can never be certain when you will have to eat the laugh Of course it sounds ridiculous to predict forces capable of pitching itching battleships into the Milky way way but but so did Franklins Franklin's I I I loony stunt with a a key ey and kite and Watts Watt's insane drool about te teakettle kettle steam and Wilbur Wrights Wright's preposterous views on aero aero jitneys not notto to mention Marconis Marconi's proposition to tomake tomake tomake make a pole in Nova Scotia chat with a astick stick in Ireland Granting that it is far fetched remember that progress in invariably invariably invariably in- in variably multiplies chances to progress further The achievement is I half way through with the idea Once the possibility gets into enough minds the cumulative efforts of students and inventors eventually put it into motion History proves it Copyright 1916 by Herbert Kaufman Great Britain and all other rights reserved |