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Show Hysterical Inventions. A gonitis with a profound thought mill has tnkeu up tho subject of dusting dust-ing and sweeping by means of suction draughts. Ho has a perambulating machine which, by means of fans and hydraulic pleasure, gets a draught through a spiral hoso wltli a nozzle shaped at its terminus like tho trouble end of a trombone. He starts up n grand racket on tho carpet till tho dust tiles, then turns on this blizzard ma-cltltio ma-cltltio and a condensed cvclono is immediately im-mediately piccipltatcd. 'He moves his hoie eud round liko tho snout of a Jei'soy hog, and whorovcr t lie "cloud of dust aiises the suction of his mechanism draws it, and It immediately goes "up the spout," so to speak. Tho idsa is nil right; tho only dllllcitltv which statids in tho way is" the possibility of his getting too big a draught on and shooting in stray leaves from the family text book, odd socks or s'.stcr's bungs. This idea, which is cluouieled as an invention in the pitunt olllco at Washington, Wash-ington, is on a par with the rocking chair w hlch came out eight mouths ago, says thu I'ittsbmg Dlspulcli. Tho Tn-eutor Tn-eutor arranged uuder tho rockers a pair of bellows attached to a scries of pipes running up tho chair back to where your neck would lest. As jou rocked the chair tho bellows work'od, nnd jou wcro given hj storied breces. It wot ked all tight for the man who could stand shower baths, but it cose one furniture dealer I know of three good customers by neuralgia, pneumonia pneu-monia ami croup. In another case lho customer tiled it nnd had to run a block to catch his wig. It's a good idea, though, hut like nil thoso tilings jou have lu get some one to think so. As for tnjself, I think thu sweeping scliomu would bo better employed shooting co.il into a cellar, and 'the . man with tho bellow s-rockcr would ' mako a fortune If he worked It up ill oiiud the eaves of n loof and blew J the snow Into the next county instead I of down the back of tho neighbor who always gets under tho mot at the wrong time. |