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Show tor? Well, how's that? Have jo don what I said and taken plenty of animal ani-mal food? John Yes, doctor; but I'll 'avo tor drop 1L 1 managed mlddlin" well with oats and maize, and done a bit at split beans; but the chopped 'ay that was too much animal food don't suit me. London Sketch. JUST FOR FUN A Lover of Green Corn. Speaker Cann..n is a great lover of green corn. Ho boards at the Arlington, Arling-ton, and one day look one of his Illinois Illi-nois farmer constituents to dinner with him. Cannon made his dinner on green corn, eating seven ears. The farmer asked him how much he paid for board nt the Arlington, and Cannon Can-non replied: "Six dollars a day." "Well," said the fanner constituent, "Joe. don't you think it would be cheaper to board at x livery stable?'' Human Life. Standing Room Only, The regular umpire was sick, and a kind old gentleman from the country agreed to do the best he knew how. All went well until the fifth inning, when, with the bases full, the pitcher got wobbly and put over four wldo ones, and the batter started to take his base. "What will we do with tho young feller?" asked the old man of tho pitcher. "We ain't got no placo to put him." Success Magazine. Months Don't Count. One day a "little mother'' of the east side brought her small charge to ' school aud proudly presented It to tht teacher for inspection. The latter, after having duly admired tho baby, said: "And how old is it?" "Oh, she ain't any yet," replied the "little mother." "But." she added, with a touch of pride, "she'll be a year in two months." Harper's Bazaar. Ba-zaar. The Moral. "Johnny." raid the minister, reprovingly, reprov-ingly, as he met an urchin carrying a string of fish one first-day afternoon, 'did you catch those fish today?" "Yc-yes, sir," answered Johnny. "That s what they got for chasln' worms on Sunday." Chicago News. Wanted One Inside. He had evidently been imbibing just a little too much. As he approaches ap-proaches the desk in a Denver hotel the other night he was Just a hit unsteady. un-steady. "Want, a room," he said to the clerk "Very well, sir," replied the clerk. "Will you have an outside room?" "No." came from the unsteady one, "a room in za hotel ul do." Denver Times. Suggested. Here arc a few title pugpestions for a new scries of educational articles: Twenty-four Dakota Divorce Do-voroe Do-voroe Decisions. Thirty-six Historical Bounders. Forty-two Pre-Noahlan Nonde-cisions. Nonde-cisions. Eighteen Famous Sneak Thieves. Twelve Roman Snobs. Plain Dealer. Easily Answered. "What animal Is the most capable of attaching Itself to man?" asked tho teacher of a juvenile class. "The bulldog, ma'am," promptly replied re-plied the boy at the bottom of the clais. Chicago News, Got a Large Bag. Jack I went gunning in the country coun-try one day laat week. Tom Rag anything? Jack Nothing but my trousers. Chicago News. Humane. An Atlanta man not long ago met a darky who was driving a horse bo thin that 1 1 staggered as it walked. "Why don't you put more flesh on that nag?" indignantly demanded the Allantan. " 'Seusy Tue. boss," replied tho driver. "Dut I'a doln de best I kin. Cnln't yo see, bos, dat po' boss kin hardly carry what little flesh he's got on him now?" Lippincott's. No Animal Food for Him. The lctor You don't fevl any bet- |