Show I i The Theater Nuisance 1 lt F l all nil the places whore where a n regular Uj O v hf w dyed In the wool nuisance cnn can bo be a n vF tv nuisance of oC tho the first water the theater IM lv I certainly the one oue Though It It iv tho place pinto where from the th very TOry nature natura of a aIt It ono ODO should bo extraordinarIly careful to consider tho privileges privilege cs and comfort of ot those these e about him the tho theater nuisance seems to be especially active In making moling those around him miserable Ho no really enjoy doing RO nt least that much can con bo be placed to his hla credit by tho the chart table mind bat ho lie simply cant go Into a theater without making i ov everyone within a half dozen rows of ot him that he heIB heis IB is present ent DC Be It said Bold In all nil fear teor and trembling and even eten whispered h softly but the tho truth of ot the th matter Is that women arc nrc tho the greatest offenders In thIs thin regard There Thore fire are plenty of oC men at nt an any show but the women women outnumber r them nt ot least 10 to 1 lust wb wh why this Is 19 eo so Is 19 an Inter Interesting eatIng esting subject for tor speculation and find no as hopelessly Inexplicable as It Is Interest interesting in ing lint But it IH lv co to an nB observation ob will rill 11 prove prote to the tho satisfaction of ot almost any anyone anyone one Theater nuisances Jilce many other things encountered frequently aro of ot In ln variety an their outbursts take tako form torm and anil shapes of at variegated hoc hue There B the lie pair of ot matinee girls who simply can cant t sit Bit through an on per performance without letting everyone within a n radius of ot 10 feet know their exact and amplified opinion of oC everything that transpires on the tho stage and ond ort off o It and andover over everythIng thing that bis happened to them during the past week he lie Just the handsomest thins thing you ever laid eyes oyes on Mume Mame tho the blond nuisance bogIes begins and that woman hes making love lovo to tot tol Heavens she the tho biggest stick you yon ever SAW Yes Yea Ind cd ed chimes In Mame Mamo in u at voice olee whose whispering qualities an nN or almost as penetrating and strident us as her normal tones I should say I 0 eho vho Is 1st Imagine Just Imagine dear being made mido love to by hy a n man like Ilka that Stint and oud not even oen showing allowing him to take hold pf Qt your hand like ike e you meant It It does get gel me how hen these managers will wilt mako a perfect dear of ot n a man make malco love loto to a alUck astick stick lUck of ot n a woman who never noer has hM been loved lo d and never Deer will bo he loved loed all nil her life off the Just lIke lIko when Bess Bessant ant nOli I went to the tho Footlight Theater last Oh Ob Look I actually going to let him kiss kin her ind 1 And so ito it oes this running comment commentary ary fir op 00 o every cery move moto every ry word of ot the hero bero despite glowering looks from thoc kayo next them and Onil In front of or them until tho the play Is lv absolute absolutely spoiled spall ell by their Inanities I Then theres s the girl who giggles and and Is Es forever and a n day fussing u lug around with hot her things Though she sho ma mn manot may not address many man actual words word to the tho young lady with her ha ehe he giggles sha les and gir I IRI RI s ever now and and punches her with her elbow and ond begins giggling 1 lIn all nil over ocr again about what she alone knows know If It shu giggling snufflIng and using her ber handkerchief and nna fixing Ox In first her ber hat bat pinned on au tho the back hack of ot tho sent In front of ot her then her lIer coat or the tho Inco laco of at her shot or re reaching for tor Ico ice water or whatnot She Shu tolls toils her companion ox es achy what 1 Is coming nest If abes seen the show before or r tries to anticipate the be laughable events on the loo stage stole Though for tor tho the sake of t being charitable cb It be bo saId paid that aunt who slie does deOs do s not do It purpose Ij 13 I always 01 moving moUng fidgeting rut rest The Ebe girl who ho insIsts on humming tho the air of ot each song Bont rendered a tow few notes ahead of ot tho singer and the tho man who seems to find some somo sort of ot Infinite Joy In Its whistling tho tim air under his breath are Aro In Inthe the thu samo does class Why they do it Is iv a myo myn tery tory unless unites 8 it bo be that they want every everyone everyone one around them to know that they aro are thoroughly familiar with the piece Or perhaps they thoy tho merely want to memorize it for tor future futuro reference or or but as OB 5 Boon eoon tu M it ono one begins Ino speculating M as to tho the why of ot It ho had better hetter drop It and for tor some flomo means of ot putting a 11 stop to it n tI little littie short of ot battle murder and anti death But the tho worst of ot all Rn nuisances bo ho It stated frankly lo la tho the man who Instate insists upon Linen climbing over OTer a Jl half dozen or so 50 people between each net act and Qed climbing back bock again Just as an tho the curtain goes boes up for tor tho next one With an air of or I know that you bo ho stands s d up op as ns the tho curtain falls to II II stud glances along tho the therow row to tho aisle Instantly tho the women reach rench wearily for tor their hats and their wraps hug them close with ono one arm and lift up the tho seat neat with tho the other Then tho the young youn man with a n hastily muttered and exceeding exasperating I beg bet your pardon pushes and shoves and crawls cr by Y stepping on toes and trampling skirts beneath his feet teet Tho The rams performance Is 11 repeated In n a few tew short minutes Just as va the tho footlights are arc low lowered ered ored preparatory to tho the rum rise of ot the tho cur cite curtain taut tain What In the tho world ho hI docs does when whoa ho bo goes out in the lobby between the acts Is 10 on nn enigma to the femInine mind Of Ot course ho he takes a smoke but surely aurely that d take nil alt that time Ome and why In the tho world cant ho do without ill Ho lIe mind however for tor or ho he la Is laTho Tho Tiso 1 1111 1 ay in Is nl IT spoiled polled by h their tb lr ono one of at tho the theater who always somehow con consider Rider themselves immune from rebul r halo o and the possessors po of ot special dispensation to do Just as aI they Jolly JoBY well please regardless of oC other peoples comfort 1 |