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Show __ TheSalt LakeTribune SUNDAYSunday, April 27,1997 J5 Photographs by Trent Nelson/The Salt LakeTribune John Barnes serves a handball game on the Deseret Gym’'s exhibition court. “You could describe us as 20-year men,” Barnes says of how long heandhisfriends have been members. visitor from Portugal whose English is no better than your Portuguese. ities, things would not have gotten Kathy Mills, DG program coor- dinator, has won morethan a few converts to the world of physical fituess with her cheerful, encouraging demeanorfor the past 17 years. She said the staff had no warning until last April that the gym might close and only then when Church president Hinckley announced at LDS general conference plans for a new assembly hall, location unconfirmed. Rumorsbeganto fly when Salt Lake Mayor Deedee Corradini said the structure wouldbebuilt on the DG'ssite. Still, LDS officials waited until this February to in the 20-yard family pool Mickey learned to swim at the old DG in 1926. She remeinbers when I first heard the news. the riff-raff here,” groused one swimmer, “we wouldn't have to look for another place to go.”” “the lovely smell of those wonder ful leather yellow couches and Office manager Debra Jones does not subscribe to such negative diatribes. In her 12 yearsat friends used to try and sneak a peek at the “boys in the buff, but oh, how I will miss all of you.” There was a farewell open house April 19. White T-shirts inscribed with DG birth and death dates were passed out along with we werenever successful.”” stories and remorse. On Thurs- out of hand. “If they would just get rid of the gym, she has seen vandalism and witnessed discipline prob- signed to various membersofthe splash-and-dash crowd. They tell about the homeless man with frost-bitten hands and the two deaths in the whirlpool that occurred from heart attacks. Theyrelish the daily pranks of Newell Knight, Harry Patrick, Dick Taylor, John Rampton and John Rodgers, members of the “BoysClub.” For years, the infor- mal groupof mostly retired businessmen hits the racquet ball courts for serious exercise then heads to the pool and regressinto schoolboys Since the newsof the DG demise, there have been the daily rumblings from malcontents. Thatthe gymis closing becauseof uncontrolled gang activity, especially on Saturdays. That vandal- ismand sexual promiscuity are on therise. Thatif the staff had been more diligent in its responsibil- continue their usual drone of CNN Headline News. For years, they have provided background noise for book-reading stair-step climbers, headphone-wearing bicycle riders, weight lifters and treadmill walkers. But today, in an ironically timed moment, the machines becomesilent all at once and the newcaster’s voice Georgeto play golf, Ted Cowley, a The barber shop trio of Nancy Morck, Dani Haskett and Frank Heimberg are movingas a team to a new shopon SocialHall avenue. The name? “The DG Barbershop.” If the Deseret Gym could build a statueto its most beloved member and formerstaffer, it likely would be in the form of Edna “Mickey” Hansen. For years, she of thelilting voice and contagious smile handed keys and towels to visitors in the women’s locker room. She talked polities, weath- er,arts andliterature with her DG friends and, by recent accounts, is the finest unofficial ambassador the gym ever had. Herinitial salary: $1.25 an hour. “But I lovedit,” said the daughter of a U.S. senator and mother of eight who lost her husband some years ago, “It was mysalva- tion.” A brokenleg forced Hansento retire in 1992, but she has been a mainstay since recuperating Mornings she can be seen walking gingerly to the gym from her homea few blocks away, ready to “dog padddle” for an hour or so men to fade awaylike a cheap BILL HALL not so much that manyheterosexuals really care if two menor two womenloveeach other spiritually were no morethanthat, might be willing to tend to their own knit Human diversity, From my per- Republicans or Chinese or liber- als or Baptists or rednecks or cults. What a drab existence this would be if everyone were just like me, AndI say that with all due respect to me. I am part of what makes your life morelively just as youare part of what makes mine that way Intruth, peoplelike New York columnist Ann Northrop — who appear to cheer the demise of creatures different from them: selves — are probably more con ventional than we whoget a kick out of other kinds of people. In this context, sheis as squareas an ting. And Lord knows, most of us ordinary in human affairs to get caught upin trying to standardize or racism or similar social dis the humanrace and in trying to other people havein their kind Idaho conservative, It is terribly get it to conformto your idea of perfection, That's what politics and reli. gion are about for the most part — not cheering or championing the diversity of humankind but trying to get all the diverse people in camp, in uniform and under control, If you're a heterosexual, you want the homosexuals to shapeuporget lost, Andif you're Ann Northrop, you want all the y that homosexual marould changethe fact mar- We humans waste enormous of what gay bashing is about. It's keeping swell people like me — and her — around: Nonetheless, you hearlegisla necktie. amounts of energy on declaring andphysically. Most people, if it pearance of homosexuals than of don’t they? It’s not about exer- key room assistant, will continue his studies at the University of Utah. overlooking the best reason for would no more wish the disap- searchers sort of miss the point. cise. It’s about community.” are relocated. DanMitchell, the 21-year-old at the front desk with the impish smile and quirky sense of humor, plans to retire and move to St. other people wrong. That's a lot bians and gay menis the variety they contribute to humankind, I pens. Thentalking to no onein particular, he mutters, “Those re- has been a bargain. that isn’t an odd thing for a lesbian to do to a man. T hope she’s kidding because, if she isn't, that would meansheis spective, the best thing aboutles- he'll be deadbythe timethat hap- each other.” And at $365 a year for an individual membership,it I suspect when lesbian columcloning makes men “totally irrelevant,” she is pulling my leg — if Brownsocks looks up at the glass screen, shakeshis head, says ied noses. The Deseret Gym is TAKEABOW Without Lesbians or Republicans, It Would Be a Dull World Indeed nist Ann Northrop writes that “Researchers have discovered five to 10 years, claiming to have the samebenefits as exercise family atmosphere where members have always watched out for Only a few full-timestaffersre- years. They laugh about the verbal fights they have settled in the lap pools between competitive swimmers who think they own their lanes and reveal nicknames, such as “Superman,”affectionately as- a pill that will be on the market in mostfortunatein thatit has a nice main, several former employees moving onto positions within the LDS Church system. All have been promised jobs and told they will lose no benefits when they members they have known for takes center stage. Across the hallway, in the circuit training room, the ceilingsuspended television monitors is unusually well-behaved, Team was used, that maybe if they received enoughletters they would change their minds,” Mills said. “We didn’t know if they had as ing school-teacher-turned-lifeguard Lisa Dahlgren and lead day supervisor Barbara Peterson, spend these last DG daystelling stories and schmoozing with Jones,various staff members and to be difficult people that come through here daily, sometimes 2,000, everyone didn't know how much the gym decision for them, either.” Mills and the DG staff, includ- patrons will gather at Dee's restaurant where‘‘we’ll cry and we'll celebrate,” said Mom. “It’s going wonderful people. I wanted te die “Like most rumors, these things start with a speck oftruth, then escalate. For the numbers of contact sports, by their nature, muchinsight as we did. Butin reality, it was probably not an easy building,It’s the people. All 1nece tionately known as “Mom.” crease,” said the woman affec- are boundto resultin a few blood- “just day, the final day, Debra “Mom” left her devasted “It is so much more thay a make an official announcement. believed those in charge The news of the gym’s closing lems, “but it is not on the in- In the meantime, protests were lodged in daily papers and letter-writing campaign was launched. One man painted big letters on his van: “Save the Deseret Gym for Our Children.” The staff and several patrons how she and her giggling girl- It would have been easier. Then I found anotherplace to swim. But, have our hands more than full withthat assignment But the heart of gay bashing or male bashing or m supremacy riage between a man and a woman is the highest station possible. Maybe Ann Northropbelieves the highest station possible is getting rid of men and marrying of thecritters around for bly whatever works for you and them. But someof us, inexplica- Successful marriageisn't s0 easy for anyone under anycir cumstance. And so any two or seven — people who can get to woman isn't before special as Nonsense Our mai is what it is regardless of anybody else on Earth does. .iaye what Your being a vegetarian doesn't junke chickgn any leas tasty to me. I can't imagine anything more stupefyingly boring than a world filled with nothing but men, or In fact, I can't think of anything more intriguing than having have going for us that others mar ry to a different drummer, All we ved is a cat? Wecertainly don't need bly, enjoyliving with them. And it doesn’t add to or detract from anything that my wife and1 kind. You hear a lot of that in these legislative attempts to out wher a amusements. After all, what good even with nothing but me and wo men, for somekind of rejection of your We are wi: various gether and make eachother or ev erybody happyis fine with me. law gay marriage. Way's Architect of Change Award winner for developing partner ships among agencies start cloning doesn’t mean that you wouldn't want to keep some yours, ask is that you hold down the whooping after 10 at night if you live next to us Thinking that men are obsolete imply because the prime reason for them — a seed source Salt Lake City, is the United The Salt Lake City Board of Education 1997 Random Aets of Kindness were: Lary Ann Bates man, volunteer coordinator, Hillside Intermediate School; Judy Beaty, Backman Elementary teacher; Michelle Arias, Elementary counselor; E) lunchwith Ann Northrop scher, Mountain View Elementary teacher Jim Kirkman, Lin: The way she teases us with the wicked thought of a world with out men makes her look like a real troublemaker She sounds like my kind of assistant; Christina Kim, West High student; and Washington El, ementary School administration and staff people has been eliminated misses the point that the little devils may have some other attributes that will Douglas Goldsmith, executive director of The Children’s Center yourself and populating the plan- But thehighest station possible in human relationships is proba Newsof Honors and Awardsfor Utahns Just because you don't need men for procreation once you et with nothing but female clones. eases is mistaking the pride that that if some guy marries an guy, that me my marriay justify their preservation. And their other uses is an argument against the passive genocide of neglecting to produce any moreof their kind Bill Hall is the editorial-page editor of the Lewiston (Idaho) Tribune coln Elementary instructional Kent DiFiore, Salt Luke oncolo gist, is the winner of “End of Life Contributions’ award from Rocky Moyntain Hospice. 4 } |