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Show I i 1 4 Lord, whzt fuels tloe irort?!? !?.' 1 4 : : By B. L. T. i Verse Tlian Litre. Gravsor, K .. a".: Siiti ! However ou ifav 'em i:t; : Like- Ka so;i a::d Oi'ki" Or C;raM':n ai1 i Kuv.r., Or Kavson, Su:':'i:i, Li:.d Cri. J. A. C. Havinsr considered S'-.ator Mason's re- marks about the pi'.--s;de:i two L'0'.. ::ins 1 or so of local divorce news, New Yu.'rc s antipathy to grand opera in Go::: an, vox 1 pop, and the movie jss.p, we atv of opinion that it is of com: aratively i"'ai importance that Mr. Holy plays li.e h:'rp ' in tiie Boston tiym phony Orches .ra. To the Refined All Things Are Eefined. : (From the MaquoUe'.a .Sentinel. ) . CT. N. Woods is han.ins sand and lum- ber for some new sheds and an impU'- ment house. Mr. Woods is a very l tisy 1 man just now, but has found time to at- 1 tend the Billy Sunday meetings at Koc'a i Island and is in perfect accord with the . great evangelist end his work. He s'.a-cs . that the many siories toid about un- seemly language used by Mr. Sunday are; false and that he has never hoard him i utter a sentence that the most refined lady could have listened to. If the riotous music-lovers of Gotham would direct their activities against all opera not merely German opera, they would be doing a service. Safety First. (From the Milwaukee Journal.) Lady wants to sing German songs in private homes. Write P-47, Journal. Of Mr. Williams, the secretary of the Elks club in Niles, Mich., the Star-Sun says: "As a promoter of the doctrine of refined voluptuousness Mr. Williams has Epicurus backed off the earth." How Athenaeus would have enjoyed this bird! "Artemus the Delicious.' (From Philip Hale's review of Don Seitz's life of the humorist.) At Big Creek, a mining camp, the lecture lec-ture was given in the Young America saloon, with the bar in full action. "One hundred and fifty miners paid $3 each to sit on planks resting on kess and roar approval at the jokes in "Babes in the Wood.' The barkeeper assisted in the applause by yelling: 'Bully, boys! Bully!' at each successful jest, and whooping a peroration : 'That's Artemus Ward from New England. Listen to him ! Ain't he sweet? Ain't he hell?" " It was on this trip that Artemus met Mark Twain, and forwarded, to help him, "The Celebrated Jumping Frog," for publication pub-lication in a New York periodical. Twain was by no means grateful. In one of his lectures he showed ill-nature when he described Artemus, and Mr. Seitz observes ob-serves that most of Twain's references "to his first mentor" smacked somewhat of envy. "Just why he should have expressed ex-pressed himself slightingly toward the friend who embraced him so unaffectedly and to whom he owed his first sunrise in the East is hard to explain." It probably prob-ably was in Twain's nature to speak as he did. Overheard by L. F. B. in an Indianapolis Indianapo-lis department store: "It's too bad," a lady customer remarked to the manager, "that the president is having so much trouble with that awful gland in his neck, isn't it?" A Sentimental Journey. (From the Long Prairie Leader.) Mrs. Jesse Plall and two daughters, Lela and Vera, departed June 2"rd, accompanied ac-companied by Mr. Lee and Mr. Hall and sons. Fay and Lloyd, by auto to Alexandria, Alex-andria, where Mrs. Plall and her two daughters took the train for Driiid, ask-. Can. They passed through Fergus Falls the day after the cyclone and viewed the ruined city, and also stopped over one day in Minot, N. D., en route. They visited vis-ited near Druid for six weeks with her parents, Mr." and Mrs. Win. Riles, .and I her four sisters and their families. On August 6th they departed, accompanied by a niece, for 'Bindloss, Alberta, where sh visited for ten days with her niece' and family. On August 17, accompanied by her niece and nephew, they a 11 toed across country ninety miles to Medicine Hat. where they took the train for Velma, N. D.. to visit with Mr. Hall's sister, Mrs. E. W. Wilson, and family. After a week's visit they departed, accompanied by Mrs. Wilson, for Wimbledoji, where thev visited with Mr. Hall's bro'her, Jay Hall, and family. Jesso Hall, of Lpng Prairie, met his wife and two daughters at Wimbledon, where he had a pleasant visit with ' his sister, Mrs. Wilson, and brother. Jay - Hall, and wife. Mr. and Mrs. Hall and family also had a pleasant, visit with Henry McColley and Dick Zable while in Dakota, and reached home safely August 26th. Last Sunday we observed fifteen or-twenty or-twenty foreign looking persons with bags and baskets of mushrooms, and we wondered won-dered how many of them would die before be-fore the week was out. -A number of them have been .reported dead. The Best of Hcasons. U. S. S. .Sara Thompson, in Mediterranean Mediter-ranean sea, along coast of Africa, weather wea-ther mild, making 8.7 knots, bound for Manila, P. I. Sir: I asked a Portuguese gentleman of the aristocracy why no carpets car-pets or rugs were to be Feen in the homes and clubs of the Azores. Hf1 replied: "Walking on them would ruin them." SIM NIC. Poet Towne's reference to a bird as ''the Galll-Curci of the night" troubles Mr. Preston, the Periscope man. who wonders whether Mr. or Mrs. G.-C. is meant. W"e cannot, aid him, even if we knew that the bird was of the big-beak variety. Our Country's Father, xxxrv. In his tastes and habits he always had simple ways; It was his custom to rise very early and shave. Wholly absorbed in his extensive agricultural agricul-tural operations, Ever progressive was he in his daily occupations. oc-cupations. XXXV. After dinner, which was served at 3 o'clock. He'd take up his correspondence, which was ne'er foreot. And regularly he'd employ himself in his library, For two or three hours dictating to his Private Secretary. XXXVI. EveniTiss were devoted to amusements for familv good. He was of a free and kindly manner, always al-ways in a cheerful mood. With his adopted children and relatives, he always enjoved jokes; To him it was a reat pleasure to cheer his home folks. The president may be considered out of dancer when he is strong enough to sign the doctor's bills. You Save Tjs the Trouble. Sir: TVre were wo-derjng whether yon wo-ild head our oftc-rimj, "Sharks ' of P. T. B. !" The T. M. C. A.'s merm-er-ship campaign in Minneapolis has for slogan, "One a Minute." D. V. S. Add Help Wanted. There was reason for the alasre. For the saw so current erstwhile, Of the gentleman of color Who h'lna out In every woodpile. Now, If landlords can be trusted, He might haunt the woodpile yet! But for furnaces and coal bins You can't find him on a Let TAX. Eelatives Are So Trying. (From the Char'eston NV-v.s.) Ruth and Roy Roirors are visUint; the sanitarium for treatment for relatives in I Johnson City. |
