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Show I A Chinese Mother's Interesting Views Upon the Modernization of China IThe Conflict Between the New and Old Family Ideals Revealed by the Wife of a High Government Official By the Lady Kwei-li Wife of Lin, Late Governor of Kiang Su. f(From My Lady of the Chinese Courtyard" ty El zabeth Cooper Published by Frederick Stokes Company New York) ' (When she was a bnde of eighteen 0Htin3 lo her husband then member of the suite of pnnce Chu g traicllmg abroad) , . Y first letter to thee was full of sadness ItI and longing because thou wert newly I' I gone from me Now a week has 'assed the sadness Is still In my heart but It s buried deep for only me to know I have my Unties which must be done my daily tasks that Jly 1 can do since thine Honorable Mother Idas handed me the keys to the r ce bin. I realize Ue great honor she does me, and at last she trustB me and believes me no child as she did Then I first entered her household RThou askest me if I still care for thee If the remembrance of thy lace has grown lebs dear 1 th the passmg of the daj s Dear one thou knowest we Chinese women are not supposed "to know of love much less to speak, of It. "We go to you as strangers we have jo cho ce and if the gods wl hhold the r great est gift the g ft of love then lite is gray and "nail as the twilight of a hope ess day Do I love thee7 I cannot tell I th nk of thee b day and 1 dream of thee by n ght It There s much wailng m the courtyards, jje 0ardener and the bearer and the watchman are having bound the feet o their small daughters The saying For every pa r of 0 den 1 lies there is a kang of tears is true Jam so sorry for them. Just when they want 0 run and play they must s t all day w th on0 feet My amah wished 10 put on tie heavy bmdngs but 1 would not permit t I sa d Do you w ant little ej es to fill with tears each tune they see you coming across tlie cour yard' If the r grandmothers do not come ; t some 0 d women trom the Ullage do the cruel th ng fcMy courtyard s filled w th the sounds of ciatng women ! have sent for the sewing women and those who do embro dery and the da s are passed n mak ng 1 ttle garments E en th ne Honorable Mother takes again the teed e and shows us how she bro dered jackets to thee when thou wert young KHe s here beloved thy son I put out mt land and touch him and the breath of the wind til ou0h the pine trees br ngs the musio of the cods to me I am wroth w th thy b 0 her Ch h peh He is a man of ery small dscenment He cannot see the wonders of thy son 1 sorrow for h m. The gods have id e y drawn a film before h s eyes JJ natch h s small face grow eacl day more ke to th ne I g ve long hours to th nking of hs future He must be a, man 1 ke thee strong nobe k ndly bearing thy great name w tj Sonor so tl at n years to come It w 1 be sa d ,Tbe first born son of Kwe h was a great and o thy man xhe gods are good ny 07ed one they are good to thy Kwe 1l J have gone the pathway the last t me to lay m offering at the feet of Kwanin She does no hear my vo ce There is no Goddess of .Mercy She is a thing of gold and vood and she has mocked my despair has laughed at ' he heart that is w th n me that a e and ,11 of an angu sh such as she has never fknonn My son my manch d i dead There are no gods there are no gods I 1m alone iThey have brought to me from tl e market p ace a book of a new God A Vo c speaks to me from out these pages a Vo ce that sa s Come unto Me all ye weary and heavy Iaden and I w 11 g ve thee rest My long ng soul cr es out O g eat and unknown God 1 e Me tljis rest Ifrwe y five tears later whe her lusbanl 1 "cs he ew Ch ese Fepub 0 as Gove t P g 01 Kwev-li writes long tetters to I er gen law who s secluded a d sla I I nee about the a na ng social cl anges jt ought by the reio ut on) I know thy mother neart will rejoice that ou-Pres ou-Pres dent shows such confidence n thy son and that 1 is many years of sen ce o h s coun try have been apprec ated It 3 necessary for him to live partly at least t 9 1 fe of a Luropean but let me assure thee that so far as I am concerned and so far as 1 can lnflue e it our life behind the screens will always be purely Ch nese and the old un ci anged customs that I love will rule mv house hold 1 will surrender no more than i3 neces sarj 0 this new tide of western sm that seems to be sweeping our China from Its moor ings There are no quiet cpurtyards no curving roofs no softly shaded windows of shell ni rounded archways but all is square and glaring and imposing seem ng to look cold y from its staring windows of glass at the stranger w thin ts gates It says loudly I am r ch t coss many thousands of taels to make my u t ness This house s much more s mple than our homes because of the many modern inst u nients that make the work less heavy and al ow it to be done by few instead of many as is our way It s not necessary to have a man attend solely t6 the lighting of tl e lamps Upon the wall is placed a mage button which touched even by the hand of gnorance floods the room w th the 1 0ht of many suns U e see no more the w ater-carrler with I is two great woodej buckets sw nging from the bamboo as he comes from r ver or canal to po r the vater nto the great kangs stand ng by the k tchen door Nor do we need to put the pow der n t to make t clear and wholesome That s done by men who do not see and they call it sanitation " The cook needs only to turn a small brass handle and the water comes forth as from a distant spring Thou hast asked me for the lates stv e in dress It s mposs ble to say w at is the latest style Some women wear a jacket far too sho t and trousers as t ght as any coat s eeve The modest one still cover them w th sk rts but I have seen women w alk ng along tl e street who should certa nly s a th n the nner courtyard and h de the r shame For those who wear the sk t the old w de pleated model has gone by and a long black sk rt that s nearly European s now worn It is not graceful but is far better than the trousers worn by women wl 0 walk along so st ff y upon the r golden 1 lies These tiny feet to me are beaut ful when covered w tl gay embro dery they peep from scarlet skirts but they too are pass ng and we hear no more the crying of children n the courtyards I am told that the small footed w oman of Ch na s of the past, along w th the long finger na Is of our gent emen and scholars and I am asked why I do not unb nd my feet. I say I am too old I have suffered n tno b nding why suffer n the unb nd ng' I have conceded to the new order by allowing unbound fet to all my girls and everywhere my fam ly s 1 eld up as an example of tl e new Ch nese They do not know of the many b tter tears I have shed over the thought that my dauahters would look 1 ke women of the serv ant class and perhaps not make a good mar r age but I w as forced to yield to the r father whose fore gn travel lad tauBht him to see beauty in uDly natural feet. Even now hen 1 see Wan li str ding across the grass I b ush for her and w sh she could walk more gracefully My feet caused me many moons of pa n but they are one of the great marks of my ladjhood and I yet feel as proud as I come nto a room with the gentle swajing motions of the bamboo in a breeze although my daughter who supports me takes one great step to five of m ne AVe hope much from America that country wh cl has so wonderful an influence upon us wh ch appeals to ,our imag nat on because t 13 great and strong and prosperous The suave and humorous American w th his easy ways is most popular w th our people although he cannot always be trusted nor is h s word a bond He Is different from the man of Eng land who s not fond of peoplo not of h s own color and wiD not try to d sgu se the fact He ,j The High Class Chinese Woman And the Modern Dress for The Old Picturesqueness of China That Is Being Swerjt of the Lily Feet m Chinese Women She Does Away by Modernization. Traditional Dress Not Like Is cold and shows no sympathy to those of an al en race althou0l we must admit be always acts w tl a certain amount of just ce Amer lea s contemptuous of China and her people but it s a k nd y contempt not t nged w t the b tterness of the other Powers and we I ope because of tl at klndl ness and also be cause of trade interests (the American is noted tor find ng and hold ng the place that v elds 1 m dol ars) si e w 11 play the part of a k ndly fr end and save Ch na from her ene ni es ho are now watch ng eacl other w th such jealous eyes There s another reason why e 1 ke America She does not seem to covet our land D d I say I d silked these fore gners' How m Id a word Thou n Sezchuan far from the touch of the al en 1 f e 1 ast never seen these people wl o cause us so much trouble How can I descr be them to thee so that tl ou w It understand' Tl ey are 1 1 e nto tl e dragons of tl e earth for ugliness Men have enormous stature and m ghty strength and str de w t ferce and lordly steps The r faces have great noses between deep set eyes and prot ud ng brows and pondero s jaws ke an mals sjrnbols of brute force wb cl needs but be seen to fr ghten children In the dark. We are t e gentler lace and we feel nst nc tivcly the dominating power of these men from over t e seas who all Amer can Russ an Ger man Engl sh seem to be cast m the same brutal mold Tier women lave long horse Ike faces, show ng the marks of pass on and discontent wh ch they try to co er with the contents of the powder jar and w th rouge they are ut terly unl ke the women of our race who are taught to express no hate no love nor any thing save perfect repose and gentleness as befits true ladyhood One has but to see a Cl inese gentleman with h s easy manners composed self-con ta ned with a natural d gn ty to know that we are better tra ned than the people from the West It is because we are tr e idealists W e show t in our grading of soc ety Wit) us the scholar s honored and put first the farmer second the art san th rd and t e merchant and the sold er last W them t ese wor si ppers of the dollar the mercl ant is put first and tl e man to guard tl at dollar s made h s equal That s a s andard for nat on Tl e barterer and the murderer let others follow where they lead My last adventure n the ways of the modern woman is In relat on to the courtship of my son Tang s my second son is n love and lbs mother am aid ng and abetting h m and a lo ng h m to see his sweetheart m the for e gn way I know thou wilt blush when thou readest this but I have been in tl e hands of tl e Gods and allowed not to speak of cus torn or propr ety and when I have tried to reason w th my son or talk to h m with re gard to what is seemly he langl s at me and cal s me pet names and rubs my ha r the wrong way and says I am hs 1 ttle mother He finally sa d Mother w It thou ask Kah li Wu Tai tai s daughter here to tea' I said Why is she a fr end of thy s ster s ' He said while looking down upon the floor "I do not know but but she is a special friend of mine " I looked at him in amazement Thou hast seen her'' Yes many times I want thee to ask her to the I ouse where we may have a chance to talk" 1 sat back m my chair and looked at him and sa d with n myself Was ever mother blessed w tl such children what may I next expect?" He gave me a quick look and came over and tool my hand in his and sa d, Now mother do not get excited and don t look as if the Heavens were going to fall I well thou makest t hard to ell thee but I want to marry Kah I and I would like a chance of see ng her as the foreign men see the t wives bfore tl ey marry them I sa d quite calmly for me Thou meanest thou art cl ooslng thy wife instead of allowing thy father and motl er to choose her' He said "Why yes I have to 1 ve w th her and I ought to choose her I sa d nothing what is the use' 1 have learned that my men folk have strong m nds wh ch they certa nly must have inher ted from th ne honorable family My daughter is not ugly she is most beau tiful yet she says she will not marry I tell 1 er that when once her eyes are opened to the loved one they will be closed to all the world beside and th s desire to enter the great world of turmoil and str fe will flee like dew drops before the Summer s dawn I also quoted he what I told Chih peh many moon3 ago when he refused to marry the wife thou hadst chosen for h m Man atta ns not by himself nor woman by herself but 1 ke the one winged b rds of 11 e ancient legend they must rise together My daughter tossed her head and answered me that those were doubtless words of great w isdom 1 ut they w ere written by a man long dead and it did not affect her ideas upon tho subject of her marr age We dare not ns st for we find to our hor ror that sTie has joined a band of g rls who 1 ave made a vow writ ng it with their blood that rather than become w ves to husbands not of the r own choice they will cross the R ver of Deatl F fteen girls all friends of my daughter and all of wl om have been study ing the new educat on for w omen have joined this sisterhood and we, tl e r mothers are in despair What can we do' SI all we insist tl at they return to tho old regime and learn nothing but embro dery! Why can they not take what Is best for an Eastern woman from the learning of the West, as the bee selects honey from each flower and leave the rest' It takes centuries of training to change the hab t3 and thoughts of a nation. It cannot be done at once our girls have not the tanda t on on which to bu Id. Our womanhood has been trained by centur es of caressing care to look as lovely as nature allows to learn obed ence to father as a child to husband as a wife and to children when age comes with his frosty fingers But it is as fool sh to talk to Wan 11 as to ask the loan of a comb from a Buddhist nun " She will not listen or if she does a smile 1 es in the open 1 ly of her face and she bows her 1 ead in mock submission then instantly I fts it aga n w th new arguments learned from fore gn books and arguments that I in my ignorance cannot refute I feel that I am alone on a strange sea with tl s my household and I am in deadly fear tl at she w 11 do some si ocking thing like t oBe girls from the school in ioochow who dressed in their brotl ers clothing came to Nanking and asked to be allowed to fight on the side of the republ c Patriot sm is a vir tue but the battlefield is man s place Let the women stay at home and make the bandages to bind the wounded, and keep the braz ers 1 ghted to warm returning men As I sa d to thee it is tho women who are tl e preservers of the family wor hip and who are trying hard to cl ng to oil loved customs Perhaps it is because we suffer from lack of facility n adapting ourselves to new condi tions We aro as fixed as the star m its orbit Not so much tl e men of China but we women of the inner courtyards seem to our younger generation to stand an immovable mountain m the pathway of their freedom from tho old traditions |