Show I CONCERNING BURGLARS ° The recurring reign of the burglar in our city has been recently as always the cue for a revival of reminiscences of housebreaking scares experienced by various va-rious people both actual and foundationless foundation-less and the meddling of the lighthanded fraternity with unguarded wmaows of numerous nu-merous members of the community of late called into discussion at an evening gathering not long since a number of unwritten gtbering written episodes participated in by some of our bestknown townspeople which furnish some seemingly runny situations situa-tions that might well challenge the laurels lau-rels in that line of many of tho farce comedies of the mimic stage One or many such experiences related around a sixtythree card table the other evening had for its hero our well known artist hK Wlllard eI1 oie I member of a family noted for its keen sense of humor an inherited tendency which accounts for the relish with which the episode in which our artist figured was related by an appreciative > relative As the story goes the artist and his family were awakened late one night by suspicious wee ll es about the household and after an Interval of suspense spent upon raised elbows in an agonizing but vain endeavor to locate and account for the unusual sounds it became evident that a search of the premises was imperative imper-ative in order to satisfy the growing curiosity cu-riosity and anxiety upon the part of all tnd especially the feminine members of the family There being no pistol in the house tho artist was confronted with the serious problem with what to arm himself in caso he should in his exploration come indeed upon a dangerous intruder cme his remises An instants meditation medita-tion furnished him with a brilliant idea I Amongst the curios in his studio was an orienia dagger extremely trail and brittle in temper but sufficient perhaps in its suggestive murderous use to strike terror to a wouldbe burglars heart if viewed from any but a close personal view Lighting a lamp he equipped himself with this semblance of a weapon and summoning what courage was possible under the ambiguous circumstances set forth upon his tour of the premises The impracticability of taking part in a handtohand encounter with what foe might be lurking in the darkness of adjoining ad-joining rooms suggested but one possible device that of intimidating the atoresaid possible presence by a sight of his weapon of suggested assault without being forced to the necessity of betraying its actual inutility With this idea he proceeded cautiously from room to room first carefully opening open-ing and then as carefully shielding himself him-self outside the door of each while he thrust lamp and dagger at arms length Into the apartment before him Posing In this attitude for a sufficient time to impress upon any intruder lurking within with-in the advisability of fleeing before his probable dire intent ho slowly followed lamp and dagger into the apartment repeating re-peating this tableau till he completed and effective tour of the premises As i transpired tho old story of a creaking shutter eventually explained the disturbing noises but had the alarm been with actual foundation there must eventually ually hae been one more added to the I I citys police record of easy captures or i sudden deaths of criminals provided the AI wW I l nS imaginary burglar were endowed with even a fragmentary sense of humor What effect the sudden appearance of he lamp and dagger thrust dramatically into vision moments before the appearance I appear-ance of the person holding them could have had either upon an amateur or callous cal-lous criminal rather than to cause partial par-tial or absolute collapse through hysteria hyste-ria it is hard to imagine Only a dead lank Impenetrable perception of the howlingly runny in situations could have rescued the individual of felonious intent recue from quick discovery and captureS capture-S < > < IAn > I-An episode in which an actual burglar I took part was participated In by another member of the same family Dr Stanley Clawson who Is also gifted with a talent tal-ent for drawing though his operations have rather a molecular than an ttistic bent There had been the same hurried wakening wak-ening by unusual sounds an agonized intern In-tern of earstrained suspense and the master of the house finally convinced that some one was tryng one of the windows win-dows down stairs jumped hurriedly from his couch and hastily throwing up the sash near at hand leaned over the sill and peered into the darkness below His quick vigilance was rewarded The sound of > grating and filing ceased and a mans figure sprang from the darkness of the shadow of the house and bounded across the lawn in the moonlight The actual proof of the rascals presence pres-ence and evident purpose upon his premises prem-ises together with a sense of the abso lute vainness of a attempt at his capture cap-ture filled the heart of the dentist with uncontrollable rage Giving vent to a yell bloodcurdling enough to have caused caus-ed heat failure on the part of any but an oakseasoned scoundrel he looked scoundrel frantically about the room for some mis idle to hurl at the burglars retreating figure The thief actually paralyzed by the dentists hideous yell came to a sudden sud-den standstill visibly quivering in the moonlight CrcYvbars bricks bullets the deadliest projectiles of modern warfare might appropriately be supposed to follow fol-low the terrifying screech He looked back The dentist plainly outlined in the window above had his arm poised In the act of hurling som object down upon him With the frantic force of Impotent rage the missile was projected from the window I Hew and where i struck some few paces back of tha terrified desperado erado the moonlight showed upon the jround a pillow No other available object being at hand the dentist in his blind rage had seized the first portable article at hand and dashed I at the intruder Whether the burglar secured this voluntarily tender piece of booty was not related but in Ws or any other case the anecdote must have made a delectable bit of gossip for he freehanded fraternity if they are given to sporting upon funny material coming their way in the professional lines hey Affect JOSEPHINE SPENCER |