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Show Kathleen Norris Says: Three Unmarried Sisters Bell Syndicate. WNU Features. "We all liked Herald, and could share Margery's disappointment when he wrote from the South seas to break his engagement." By KATHLEEN NORRIS "T HAVE three very at-I at-I tractive daughters, aged 29, 27 and 23," writes Mrs. Baker of Illinois. "Two are schoolteachers and one is head librarian of our public library. My only son was drafted five years ago, married mar-ried the following year, and while he lives in our small town and everything is friendly friend-ly enough, there is no especial espe-cial sympathy between his sisters and his wife. He has two little girls who stay with us overnight occasionally. Otherwise we have small contact with his family. "About three years ago, a young naval lieutenant paid marked attention at-tention to my middle daughter, Margery. Mar-gery. Her sisters, Emilie and Barbara, Bar-bara, found this rather amusing, but we all liked Harold, and could share Margery's disappointment when he wrote from the south seas to break his engagement. I believe she has recovered from this experience, experi-ence, but she has had no Either admirer, ad-mirer, and Bobs and Em have never had a love affair. I am writing to ask you if you can explain why, and also if you have any suggestions that will bring these lovely young women Into the ordinary current of courtship and marriage? "They are all nice-looking, pleasant-mannered, dress well and hold good positions. They have many friends, if no especial Intimates. Their father was an invalid until three years ago, when he died. Since then, ours has been a happy, busy household of women. We love our garden, put up apples and peaches and berries from our few trees every ev-ery year, love books, enjoy good radio ra-dio and record music, take a deep interest in each others daily recital re-cital of events. We attend church, and the girls have a hundred small activities of ironing, embroidering, knitting, cooking, trying to win prizes for contests of all sorts, writing writ-ing poems for competitions and so on. Skeptical of Marriage. "That they have a somewhat skeptical and humorous view of marriage and motherhood is natural; they see their friends burdened bur-dened with domestic cares, nurseries, nurser-ies, husbands not always easy to please, and they remember the exactions ex-actions and difficulties of their father's fa-ther's peculiar nature. Perhaps they are unconsciously too exacting exact-ing In their demands upon men, but then men don't come near enough even to be judged as possible husbands. hus-bands. Margery now blames herself for her broken engagement, as she wrote Harold about the closeness of the relationship among us all, and reminded him frequently that he was marrying the whole family. This may have seriously impressed a man at a long distance from home, a man who was . not too well acquainted with his wife's people. "But I know, or I suspect, that it would make all three girls happy to have one of them marry well, and a man in the group might bring In other possible husbands. As their mother, I am completely content with this smoothly-running, harmonious harmo-nious household, but sometimes I suspect myself of selfishness, and wonder where I failed them, If I failed them. Please advise an adoring ador-ing mother." My advice to the adoring mother may surprise her. I am going to advise ad-vise her to let well enough alone. She has more than her share of feli- They have independence, comforts . . LEAVE TEEM ALONE A widow with three unmarried unmar-ried daughters is concerned about them. She says they are attractive and well educated. Two are teachers and the other oth-er a librarian. They have a pleasant home in a small city. While they have many friends, they have Jew close ones. Since their father died, these girls have been interested in church affairs, books, music -and household matters such as canning and sewing. They enter en-ter various magazine contests, especially in verse writing. Their ages are 23, 27 and 29. The middle one was engaged to a naval officer, but he broke the engagement while ir the Pacific area. All the girls take a somewhat "skeptical and humorous view of marriage," disliking its worries, risks and problems. They were depressed de-pressed by the long period when they had to care for their invalid father. This mother thinks, however, how-ever, that if one of them should enter a happy marriage, the others would be pleased, and perhaps follow suit. She asks Miss Norris how she can help to interest some desirable men. Miss Norris replies, rather rath-er startlingly, that the best course for her would be to do nothing. Perhaps these girls are best fitted for the single life. A marriage among them might be a mistake, and would very possibly destroy the present pres-ent fairly happy situation. city now, a lovely home, no money worries, a son and grandchildren, and three satisfied, busy, useful daughters. Why go out of her way to bring in some element that, with these girls' peculiar upbringing may well upset the applecart once and for all? Some Like Single Life. There are women who really like the independence, freedom, comfort of single life. To be sure, there are not often three of this sort in one family, but here are three who, with their mother, have evidently built themselves a snug and complacent com-placent pattern of life. They smile with superiority at the idea of a man's dominion over and influence upon, his wife, of the undeniable responsibilities re-sponsibilities and fatigues of home-keeping home-keeping and child-bearing. Ninety-nine Ninety-nine men out of a hundred would have no patience with them and their opinionated position, and the hundredth man would be of the spineless sort that would fulfil their dreariest expectations of matrimony. matri-mony. If I were you, adoring mother, I would accept the idea of their bachelor-girl status, improve upon it with plans for a mountain or beach cabin, new collections and hobbies, pleasant ways of wearing hair or designing frocks that will express their own individualities. Let the idea of attracting men go; try instead in-stead to help the girls grow pleas-anter, pleas-anter, gentler, less assertive and smug. Their fate is probably singleness. But accepting that idea, and work-' tag from that angle, may well prove to be the bait that will draw them to truer and gentler ideals of womanhood, wom-anhood, and so find for each one of the three a wider happiness with a real mate. |