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Show Noise Abatement Group Lists Things Which Would Help NEW YORK. These are things being sought by the national noise abatement council: A honkless horn, an alarmless alarm clock, a barkless, growlless, snarlless dog. Why? Because nervous folks from coast to coast are complaining about these noises. And that isn't all. The council could use right nicely a rubber-bottomed, bounce-proof garbage gar-bage can, a crowless rooster, a drip-less drip-less faucet and ways and means of giving all baritones and sopranos a quick case of laryngitis. These are just a few of the current cur-rent demands on the council .They were made by nervous nellies from coast to coast who are allergic to any noise more jarring than a dog whistle which only dogs are supposed sup-posed to be able to har. Paul Washburn, a member of the council's board of directors, discussed the matter in an energetic ener-getic whisper. He said his office had received complaints from just about everyone except the lucky persons who can retain their sanity by tuning their hearing aids in on gilt-edged silence. The complainers object to sounds ranging from the popping of champagne cham-pagne corks to the pitching of crockery by irate husbands. One woman was nearing the end of her rope because a neighbor splashed around noisily in a bubble bath every midnight. Another said the sea lions in the Central Park zoo kept her awake. A whole neighborhood in the Bronx was aroused by a woman who played the same piece off key on her untuned piano every night for a year. Manhole covers that flap bois-terosuly bois-terosuly every time a car is driven over them are a constant source of annoyance to a lot of sensitive insomniacs. in-somniacs. Others get the willies when they hear yowling cats, hooting hoot-ing hoot owls, chirping canaries, and the unlovely love call of peacocks. |