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Show W" 10 MEN. polities and fishing t'l been dlmuaaed hy the uroup l.i,. of rood fellowa In the IWtrl lrD.'j- lobby. Suddenly the Missouri Colonel, who had been making an astonishing record aa a listener, aald: "What you fellowa have been savins reminds me of a hog my father owned when I waa a youtiKster on H" farm." Nothing had been said which rouM possibly remind tho Colonel of a k. hut the group waa aware of the fad that tho Colonel waa alwaya belnl reminded re-minded of smoothing; and anyway, all wished In hear what he had to lay. Tho Colonel straightened out In nl chair and began: "I have niot ninny allck article In my lime, but that hog was the wlli-Sftt thing I have ever had to den I with The summer he reached the top not rb of his record aa the allpiHTtcst pie' of pork In the Mississippi valley there hnppcned to he one of the most flour lulling corn niips ever seen on our farm. 1 waa detailed to keep stonpes all crn. ks In tha fence Inclosing ths crop. The first two or three weeki after the corn waa In the roasting enr sIbko I kept everything out tight, an then I was forced to throw up the sponge to a hazel splitter shont That hog suddenly formed tho habit of R Ing through the fence every time hi was hungry and a good many times between be-tween times." Tho Colonel mado the customary pause to observe the eft. -i t of the ia trodiictlon. A neckwear drummcrwho had Just told the championship flk story snld "Well?" inquiringly, aui the Colonel proceeded: "What worried mu wna that 1 couldn't could-n't find where, tho hog got through t he fence. I walked round and round It, hut not a rrn.'k large enough to admit Hint porker could 1 discover. I Ink! my troubles In-fore the old man hit everyday imnin for father hut rouhln't help mc; in fact, ho snld tl.at the hog couldn't fly. an fur as he knee, and Unit it either went Ihruurj a crack or Jnrnpod over tho tup, the -?-e? . Inttcr of which I C"i-7C'A A didn't believe ut all -'fXl because tin: feme vAlA wns twelve) rnlls 'iV 'i vv I high. Another we.-k , if j; .-yJ t lipped by and tho r-.i"-J(v:iy hazel splitter con e" tinned his depredations In the corn." "Why didn't you wnlch hlra when he left the field?" Interrupted one of the group. "Watch him!" exclaimed the Cokmsl In disgust. "I'd like to have seen you watch that hoa. He waa too allrk to be cauRht that way. When 4 w.vi-run w.vi-run him out of the field he would lin-ply lin-ply bow hla back, give a "muff! whuff!" and run away from tha dog, and aftor looking my eyes about out 1 would go borne to find hlra sleeping peacefully with the other boga. "Nearly a week went by and the caae waa becoming deaperate. Tha bug had eaten hla head off. to say nothing of the corn be bad destroyed and wasted. The last circus of the aeaaon waa coming to town In a few days, and the old man hinted that If I cared to go I would have to fatten that hog out of the Bold. That was enough; I vowed I would get even with the hog If I had to follow lira all day and aloep with him at nlcbL I noticed (after the old man bad aan-tluneil aan-tluneil the circus) that when I got after him be alwaya ran In the direction direc-tion of a small, uncultivated lot wslch took up a aection of one end of the field whore In win-f win-f tor the fodder was j- rlrked. I concluded it 'r that be must have fiTys hia entrance and -j'ft'li exit there, although x, yVrv I bad gone along ' T Z"' ' fence a doxan OuJ, time. Hrlght and $?ff '' c,rl'' ona "lornln ' I hid whore I could A-anfJ 'J sen tho fence In 1 K ) cither direction for Vti hundred yards aflSSrfll i along the lot. S JaSv'Sr i D0Ut the time the f .Jrt up I aaw Mr. llaiel-' llaiel-' splitter coming up tho path ou a trot, so hungry for green ruru that he was squealing to himself. When bo was about twenty yards from me be turned Into a corner where the fence waa built over a large hollow log. "I thought my eyes would fnll out of my heud when I saw Hint hog rrawl through the log into tho field. As soon aa I could recover my breuth I went after tho bruto. llo disappeared, and, uf cnurso, went out through the log. While I was inking tho fence down to remove tho Uz tho thought struck mo that I should in soma way get even with the hog. Instead of tulilnc. the log out I turned It around, still leaving it under tho curlier so both ends would ho on the outside of tho field. I then rebuilt the fence and retired to a secluded spot to await developments. de-velopments. "It was not long until tho hos came trotting back', am! seeing that tho roust waa clour ho went atrnlelit tu the leg. piled In uml riiiwlc! through. Winn ho emerged ot the other end ho paused with a dazed look and took nilnuto notlro of his sur rounding. Hoeing that ho wns nut fur from where ho stinted he returned to tho other end un.l crawled through ai-nlu. Another duzed aud pulncd expression, ex-pression, aud ho rrawled through again, Iu a low uilnutoa be was truv I'ng In a circuit and squealing, pill- . fully. Aa fat as he would rrawl through, only to llnd himself atlll on 4 the outside, he would crawl through 4 again. . 'I laiiKhed myself almost Into a " spasm, and then began tu count tha 4 trips through the hole. At the forty- 4 first count the har.elsplltter waa sud- . denly Belied with an Idea. He re- " fleeted a moment and then reverssd 4 the action, crawling through from the 4 a other end. lie went V that route thirty ViA!j1 seven times hy ae. -'eiYXr r,l,inl- " na'l i 'a XVf"- "rn "'" '''r VLjOlt. hla Imck. and, fear- A '"rV keep It up as long , tL ' as he hnd any hack- , other end. He went thnt route thirty- 1 seven times by actunl count. Ho had worn the hnir off his bai'k, and, fearing fear-ing that he would keep It up aa long as he had any backbone lolt, 1 came from my hiding placo and Intervened.'' 1 In response to several "lleresl' from the group tho Colonel said: "Well, I went to tho circus." ' |