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Show Curiosa Americana By Elmo Scott Watson PAGE MR. WEBSTEK! IF YOU like to "talk high, wide and handsome," you might practice up by learning the text of this letter which a Louisiana i clergyman once wrote to a gentle- man in Virginia with whom he j seems to have had a disagreement ' Here is his letter: 1 "Sir You have behaved like an impetiginous acroyli like those in-quinate in-quinate orosscrolest who envious of my moral celsitude carry their mu-gacity mu-gacity to the height of creating symposically the fecund words which my polymathic genius uses "with uberity to abiligate the tongues of the weightless. Sir, you have orassly parodied my own pet words, as though they were tan-grams. tan-grams. I will not conceroate reproaches. re-proaches. I would obduce a veil over the atramental ingratitude which has chamiered even my un-disceptible un-disceptible heart. I am silent on the foscillation which my coadful fancy must have given you when I offered to become your fanton and adminicle. I 'will not speak of the liptitude, the ablepsy you have shown in exacerbating me; one whose genius you should have ap-' ap-' proached with mental discalcation. ' So, I tell you. Sir, syncophically and without supervacaneous words, I nothing will render ignoscible your conduct to me. I warn you that I I will vellicate your nose if I thought your moral diathesis could ' be thereby performed. If I thought i that I should not impigorate my ; reputation by such a degladiation. Go tagygraphic; your oness inqul-nate inqul-nate draws oblectation from the greatest poet since Milton, and draws upon your head this letter, which will drive you to Webster, and send you to sleep over it. " 'Knowledge is power,' and power pow-er is mercy; so I wish you no ro-vose ro-vose that it may prove an external hypnotic." |