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Show They tell you that long before he was elevated to the position he now , occupies. Jim Byrnes was always J successful in getting FDR to read his memos to the White House. Because his notes were never longer than four lines. Byrnes learned his lesson the first time when he sub- mitted a windy report to the Presl- I dent. "Did you read it?" he inquired. "Head it?" said FDR, "I couldn't even lift it!" I Lieut. Comd'r Jack Dempsey was reminiscing. He told about Mike Trent, a long-time admirer who was In his group when he was training for his fight with Comd'r Gene Tun- j ney. Mike was sent over to scout the Tunney training camp to bring Dempsey information of value on Tunney's style and hitting power. Mike returned breathless. "It's a set-up." he reported. "I seen him readin' a book!" The Stork Club's host, S. Billings-ley, Billings-ley, is also renowned for sending gifts to customers and others. The gifts usually are rainbow-hued cravats. cra-vats. One recipient replied: "Many, many thanks for your thoughtful-ness. thoughtful-ness. It's the first time, and what a relief, that the Stork ever brought me ties! Eddie Cantor." In Scribner's rare book dep't, says the Sat. Review of Literature, a well-groomed customer asked Nick Wredin: "How is this volume bound?" "Genuine calf," he said. "How was that again?" "Calf genuine calf!" "What did you say?" Nick threw back his head, closed his eyes and roared: "Moo!" The Sunday N. Y. Times radio section reports the reaction of listeners listen-ers to WJZ's new transmitter of 50,-000 50,-000 watts . . . One New Hampshire listener Is quoted: "It's been our pet gripe (in our neck of the woods) that WJZ had such excellent programs, pro-grams, yet was the only major station sta-tion that simply could not be heard with any degree of ease. Why, Sunday Sun-day evening we could even hear Winchell's tonsils quiver." New York Novelette: This is one xf those stories that sweep the town now and then, and everybody always al-ways knows the woman it is supposed sup-posed to have happened to. But when you ask them to name names they say they mustn't. Because they cannot . . , Anyhow, a woman was talking to a friend on the phone, explaining she couldn't meet her because be-cause of a cold,-etc. ... A strange third voice broke in and said: "Madam, "Mad-am, I am a doctor. I suggest you try this prescription for your throat." Whereupon he offered it . . . She asked his name ... He replied: "You will never know that!" And got off the line ... So a few nights later at a party she was amazed to hear a man at the table relate the Incident ... He was the doctor! . . . The woman said nothing . . . She got his phone number from the hostess . . . Next day she called him saying she was the lady with the cold. She thanked him for the prescription . . . "Who are you?" he asked . . . "You'll never know," she cooed, hanging up. Will Mahoney, star American vaudeville headliner (in Australia and England many years), has become a British subject ... J. Durante's pals call him "Sweet-nose" ... A leading lead-ing male hairdresser threw a Christmas Christ-mas poddy for his swishy friends. They had a Pink tree! . . . Alan Gale's thumbnail description of Vice-Pres. Vice-Pres. Wallace: "He takes his job seriously instead of himself" .' . . Reader's Digest credits the "One of our cities is missing" gag (made famous by the wire services) to a contributor. It credits "Thumbnose Sketch" "Watch your hat, coat and girl friend" and "Feud administrator" administra-tor" to everybody except this col-yum, col-yum, where they were born. Quotation Marksmanship: A. A. Milne: There was a full length novel in her sigh . . . M. Buchanan: The ash-can of her past . . . H. Smith: No one should be conceited. Talented people do not need It, the untalented do not deserve it ... H. P. Estabrook: Some people's voices are hard to extinguish over the phone . . . Joan Eden: II success doesn't give you a big head, it gives you big headaches . . . H. Balson: Nice people always have trouble finding people to be nice to them . . . H. Horner: She didn't catch a husband, she trapped one . . . Rose Macauley: A book to kill time for those who like it better dead . . . Ambrose Bierce: Positive is being mistaken at the top of one's voice. Sammy Renick, the jockey, was gagging about George Raft's shadow, shad-ow, "Killer" Gray, who has never even killed a fly. The "Killer" attended at-tended a swanky Jockey Club affair j in Hollywood once, where Mrs. C. , V. Whitney was at the same tabie. He conversed in typical Brooklyn- ese. j Someone at the table asked the "Killer" why he didn't cash in on his publicity and go into the movies like his pal Raft. 1 "I don't wanna be like Raft," he I aid, "I only wanna live like himl" I ' I |
