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Show MILLARD COUNTY CHRONICLE, DELTA, UTAH VIRGIN By Len Kleli BUVIN6 VDU s THAT THIN6 sw-- "1 SxskJ I m l I 'j Tyu Evidence The visiting pastor at the state prison approached a timid looking inmate and asked him how he came to be confined in such a place. "Well," said the prisoner, "they claimed I stole a ring. I had a good case and my lawyer worked hard to get me off, but they sentenced me just the same." "My poor fel-low. How unfortunate," exclaimed the pastor, puzzled by the seeming Injustice. "But tell me, how did they happen to sentence you?" "Oh, it was quite an accident," explained the prisoner. "Everything would have been all right if they hadn't found the ring in my pocket." One At A Time The man who rows a boat does not have the time to rock it. NOT SO TOtJGH The conductor of a famous Phil-adelphia orchestra accepted with equanimity the announcement that his first violinist was giving solos on the radio, indorsing cigarettes and playing for weddings and funer-als. But when he also heard that the violinist was opening a string of music schools throughout the state, he grew concerned and summoned the man for a conference. "I like a man with ambition and initiative," he declared, "but it seems to me you're carrying things a bit far. When do you sleep?" The violinist looked him straight in the eye and answered, "During your rehearsals, Maestro." All Too True! Two drivers, from neighboring (and rival) states were having a bull session ... . each bragging about his own state. One of them, more wordy than the other, was getting the best of the argument. Finally, the loser, as a last shot, said: "Well, in my state we have the finest governor and the best legislature that money can buy!" GOOD ARITHMETIC The Korean campaign has re-vived stories of fantastic poker games in rest areas, with GI's risk-ing a whole month's salary on a single hand. Typical is the tale of the Missouri farm hand who professed to know nothing of the game. His buddies saw a chance for some easy pick-ings and enthusiastically urged him to participate. He lost moderately and unspec-tacular- ly for some time. Then came the big hand of the evening. One after another, the players raised the limit. The Missourian stayed each time. Finally came the showdown. Player No. 1 had an ace-hig- h straight. No. 2 had a heart flush. No. 3 triumphantly produced a king-hig- h full house, and was about to rake in the pot when the boy from Missouri said quietly, "One minute, mister. I ain't quite sure, but I think I got you beat with these two pairs of sevens." What, We Pray? Don't you often wonder why it is that they always talk about a doc-tor practicing. STOP SIGN The passenger train had stopped at one of those cross-overs where an interlocking tow-er stood. The conductor courte-ously answered as many ques-tions about the delay as he could but they finally got the better of his patience. "Say, conductor, what's the matter?" came yet another query. 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Yet Snowdrift costs you not a penny more! So taste the difference Snowdrift makes in fried foods and treat your family to the best! - V Good Housekeeping J --ggiS-, ZliC . 31b,.:: i , Snowdrift Wends QUCK Js4f 1 A for Quick-Metho- d Cakes f QyfllV mixes QUICK "an""' forBeffer Bscuifs J fJi- - cot in QUICK APSiikJ forFafeyPasfr- y- WHEN GOOD TASTE COUNTS"2 PURE VEGETABLE SHORTENING MADE BY THE WESSON OIL PEOPLE SUNY ; by Clort S. Hop, ; fcS ( BSeSrS I ( Tsurty closed' J aJ&A RIMIN TIME By POSEN H5WN AWTOF PIPES- - IVE MO ITNOW FOR YEAR- S- WHAT I LIKE KSTABOLTrXdlM, "tHEMDAYS ARE GONE T. TO SMOKE IT IS AT E R BESSIE ByNlCKPENN EVEWIFHEHIT I AM 7oU BUT I WANT TO ) I ft V I -- YOU RRSTjCOUMT COUMTIMG, Ar KNOW WHERE .1-q- L) 9 QT& BEFORE vau MUTT AND JEFF By Bud Fisher ' WHAT ) Kfiftv VOung man, you don't I po you Know that. o.K., Pop! GO ahead") NEV, POP, GIMME SEEM TO REALIZE THE S Sin ORDER TO EARN - I'll WAIT! BUT MAKE ) FDURBITS- -I nrfj pip ) VALUE OF MONEy.' DO ' SURE, FFTy CENTS. I rI Is IT SNAPPY, THE SHOW WANNA GO TO JvcOSTj Tup VOL) KNOW WHAT Tl FOUR HMB TO WORK t STARTS IN HALF ANJ "( JITTER By Arthur Pointer JITTER, GETOUTOF) YOU H I O ' f I luj, -- - '. iaA HEW. .YOU MAKE ywrOLPAYMENOV - --v N if'l 's ; MNEevOUSAfoU'UHWETOSINK ra-3- l WVIDEANDWOOLY By Bert Thoma, mwS, COUPLAGOOP S. WE COULPFEEP A YOU BOYS I "i. "T"' " WORK ON YOUR RANCH?) THE CX)WS ANP kr ARE TOO SILLY K r'uYc L v , XMILK THE CHICKENSy l RUN ALONa to GET ON V vSV y CrT j HORSE1 ) ff'A ' 7r "I've had the impression lately that the Wild pCf "It's always a shock to look at Tyrone Power S? West is a lot wilder today than it was when for two hours and then leave with Alvin!" J we were kids!" |