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Show THOUGHT LITTLE OF LOVE Disraeli's Views on Marriage Oome-what Oome-what Unconventional. Disrncll, nfterward Lord Deacons-field, Deacons-field, wroto to Ids slstfcr when ho was a young; man: "By tho by, would you llko Lady Z for a sister-in-law-very clever,1 25,000, and domestic? As for Movo,' nil my friends who married mar-ried for lovo and benuty oltlier beat their wives or llvo apart from them. This Is literally tho caso. I may commit com-mit many follies in llfo, but I never intend to mnrry for 'love,' which I am sure Is a gimrnnty of infelicity." Within With-in rmir years Disraeli had married, not Lady Z , but tho rich widow of Wyndhnm Lewis, of whom ho had written on meeting her for tho first time: "A pretty llttlo woman, a flirt and a rnttlo; Indeed, gifted with a volubility vol-ubility I should think uncqualed and of which I enn convey no Idea. Sho told mo that sho liked 'silent, melancholy men.' I answered that I had no doubt of It." In a Tight Fix. Clarenco O'Urien, fnmlllarly known to his convives in Now York society as "Paddy tho I'iir." was locked ud in tho stution houso In tho Tenderloin Ten-derloin district a few days ago for Bomo llttlo indiscretion. Ills normal weight Is 400 pounds, and ho could barely squeeze through tho door ot tho coll. Btnco then ho has gained twenty pounds and neither a writ of habeas corpus nor a block and tackle can get him through tho cell door again. Capt. Walsh Is greatly perploxed by tho situation and Is about enlisting tho services ot a wrecking company to provide a way out. Living Up to Principles. Onco when Inviting a guest to Lambeth Lam-beth palaco Dr. Tomplo, tho Into archbishop arch-bishop of Canterbury, Is said to have told him: "You know my principles; you will find nothing but water on my dinner tablo; but my servants hnvo orders to seo that wlno Is placed In your bedroom." In duo courso tho visit was returned and tho host said to Dr. Teraplo: "I know your principles. princi-ples. My servants have orders to offer you no wlno at dinner; but you will And plonty of water In your bedroom." bed-room." Easy, to Overcome. When young Mr. Armstrong was appointed on assistant secretary of tho treasury by Mr. Shaw thero was great commotion among older aspir ants for the position. A friend of ono of Uioso men said to Secretary Shaw: "Of course, Mr. Armstrong is all right, Mr. Secretary, but Isn't he Just a llttlo young?" Mr. Shaw replied with a quizzical look: "Well, maybe he Is, but then glvo him timo and he'll get over that all right." A Logical Deduction. A witness In tho Superior court a few days ago gavo a new reaijon for his assertion that a man had been drinking. Ho said the man to whom he referred was not drunk, but he believed be-lieved he had a couplo of drinks. Pressed by counsel to give his reason rea-son for such an assertion, ho replied: ' vVcll, It was about 11 o'clock at night I saw him and I think any man who is out that late at night must have had a couple of drinks." Philadelphia Phila-delphia Ledger. Ethics of Sham Battles. A Canadian paper tells this story: It was during a sham fight botween two volunteer coips. Ono of tho opposing op-posing forces was rotrcatlng before tho other. Sergeant-major (fB captain) cap-tain) "Wo are going too far away from tho railway station, sir If wo retreat any moro we'll never get back In timo to catch tho train." Captain "How absurd of tho colonel to drive us so farl Ordorly, run over to tho officer in charge ot tho cnomy and ask him, with my compliments, if ho will please retreat toward tho railway station." Good Story on "Bill" Nye. Nato Salsbury and "Bill" Nye wero great friends. When the humorist first engaged In nowspnpor work In this city, and took a Uouso on Statcn Island, th! showman went to dinner with him, Nyo exploded somo now stories, and Salsbury, turning to bis host's little girl, said: "Very clover papa you've got, my dear." "Yes," responded tho demure llttlo miss, "when there'B company," Worse Than Bigamy. Judgo Charles Truax has visiting him for tho holiday season a vcnorublo femalo relntlvo from up In Connecticut, Connecti-cut, says tho Now York Times. The othor ovenlng ho remarkod: "Do you think that Congressman-elect Rood Smoot, tho Mormon apostle, Is guilty of bigamy, Aunt Moll3sa?" "Bigamy!" ejaculated the aunt. "Ho I is giillt of trigonometry at least." |
