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Show REBUKED BY DR. HOLMES. H Witty Manner In Which Upstart Was H Given a Lesson. fl A man who suddenly beenmo rich M and somowhat prominent In tho world M adopted mnnnera which ho considered M appropriate to his now station in llfo, H but which irritated his friends by a H suggestion of condescension. M Dr. Holmes administered tho follow- H lug robuko: M Ono of the now fashions particular- H ly distasteful to tho man's correspond- H cnts was his habit of sending lottora H which read: M "Mr. Instructs mo to say that H ho has received your lotter of March H 10, and would say In roply (etc., etc) H John Jones, secretary, H Having written in this manner to H Dr. Holmes, ho was more surprised M than amused to rccolvo tho following answer: M "Mr. Holmes has dlrcctod his valet H to Instruct his secretary to tell his H tj powrltcr to Ray that ho Is in rocolpt H of your Rccrctary's letter of somo days H Blnco, and would say In roply (etc, etc.) Sarah L. Hodgkiss, typewriter." H Down in Oklahoma a preacher In H delivering his farowcll sermon said: H "I don't believe tho Lord loves this H church none; of you ever die. I don't H believe you lovo each other, I never 'H married any of you. I don't bcllovo H you lovo me, for you don't pay me my H salary only In wormy fruit, and by H their fruits yc shall know them. I H am going to a better place; I am going - H to till the place of chaplain In tho pent- H tcntlary. Where I go yo cannot H come, but I go to prepare a placo for .H Afraid of the Auburn Hair. H Tho mere fact that Mary Jano Cor- H nlsh of Allan, Md., had fiery rod hair H would not bo very peculiar wero it not H for the fact that Mary Jano herself is H as black and shiny as tho aco ot H spades. Her hair, though rod, is as H kinky as It would bo If It wero black. H Mary Jano was born with red hair, H and it has been a misfortune to her, H for as a child sho had to stand the H Jibes of all her neighbors, black and H whlto, and now as a young woman she has no steady company. Ono man, whon asked why tte did not court so H honost and Industrious a girl, said: H "Boss, I hab alius heord dat red- hoadod white folks am do dobbil, but iH a rod-headed nlggah Lawdl Sho am H do dobbil untied." M Gen. Stuart Made Impreeslon. H At a meeting of tho Gen. J. B. B. H Stuart Monumont association in Rich- ' mond, Va., the other day MaJ. A. R. H Venablo related the following incl- H dontt "Ono act of Gen. Stuart's mad H a great impression upon me. When he H was sovoroly wounded by an Indian H chief In ono of the Western campaigns ot 18G7 wo bandaged his wounds and H startod to put him to bed. Although H sufforlng intensely, ho rofusod to lie H down until he had knelt at his bod- H Bldo and prayed. It waa such an un- " H usual thing for the army officers in 'H the West at that time to pray that Gon. Stuart's act made a lasting lm- H prosslon upon bis associates." fl Their Slight Request. H In Haverhill, Mass., tho homo town a' H ot Secretary Moody of tho navy, there ,. M is an Informal association ot gentle- , mon which for tho prosont purposos & may romaln nameless, but whoso ob- M Joct la tho vory doflnlto pursuance of M any old scheme which involves a good M When tho prcsa dispatches an- nouncod Mr. Moody's appointment the mombors of the association drew up a telegram as follows: M "Dour Bill: Wo'ro glad you'vo got tho Job. Please send up tho Dolphin; the gang wants to go fishing." Now H York Times. H |