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Show A FASHION STARTED. Tou know how cloak models influence influ-ence women to buy clothes, whether they are becoming or not?" Inquired the man with the double chin. "Yes," replied the chauffeur. "Well, I think we'd better put the-car the-car up for a while and not take any of these long trips through the country. coun-try. If my wife sees how pretty some of these farm girls look in overalls, she's going to want to wear 'em." Light Labor. "It's fascinating to watch a gang of expert billposters sticking up lithographs litho-graphs in a high wind, without letting a single sheet get away from them," remarked the observant citizen. "So it is," answered the man who is-easily is-easily worried. "After witnessing a performance like that I wonder why it ever seemed troublesome for me to stick a stamp on a letter." CO-OPERATION. You keep a joint bank account ac-count with your wife, do you not? Tes, I deposit the money and she draws it out. Elopement Today. "Oh, fly with me." the young man sane To fair, coquettish Jane, Who left her home without a pang. Aboard his aeroplane. A Question of Taste. One morning Mr. Smith was heart! talking to himself while making his morning toilet in a manner that denoted de-noted much perturbation. "I wonder," said Mrs. Smith, "what's provoked father now?" "Oh, it's nothing much, mother," answered an-swered little William. "I just put a tube of sister's oil-paints in place of his tube of toothpaste." Tit-Bits. Befuddling the Jurors. "We must have a physiological chemist to testify in this murder trial," said the eminent criminal lawyer. "But the horny-handed jurors won't know a physiological chemist from a taxidermist." "Of course not. That's why we've-got we've-got to have the expert testimony of a physiological chemist." Advantage of Large Words. "Did you call me a bonehead?" asked ask-ed the big man. "No," answered the little fellow. "I merely referred to you as an example of cerebral ossification." "H'm. Would you mind waiting here a minute till I go and look in the die- v , tlonary?" The Contrast. "Those two do not pair well." "Why not?" "Because he is a bird and she is a peach;" END OF FLIRTATION. FLIR-TATION. Jack (bitterly) : : 1 suppose y o u consider it quite a triumph to make a fool of a man. Edith: Why. no. A triumph means something accomplished accom-plished (bat was very difficult. Why? I've often tried to figure out Just what can be the reason A fellow ets spring fever Right in the busy season. The Round Robin. "father." said Ihe small boy. "what Is a round robin'.'" "A round robin, my sou. is a small hoi bird that is highly considered by some epicures as food for I bought." Depends. Mrs. A. Does your husband on- sidor you a necessltj or a luxury? Mrs. B. It depends, my dear, on whether I am cooking his dinner or asking for a new dress. A Counter Odor. "My wife gave a rose tea yesterday everything seen tod with roses, you know." "A delicate conceit." "Yes. but things wenl wrong. The woman in the adjoining flni cooked boiled dinner." The Little Boy. "I hope your little ho) never tells n lie." "1 don't know. I do know I hill at limes be tells a lot of embarrassing truth a." |