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Show vi tA J3Y KENNETT Pv A yi Ajimi&Wfk MELISSA INCLINES TO OCCASSIONAL OCCAS-SIONAL AGREEMENT. Mrs. Merriwid pushed up the right sleeve of her loose dressing robe and fexed the biceps of her beautifully rounded arm after the most approved method, frowning a8. she did so. "Shockingly flabby!" she remarked to her maternal maiden aunt Jane. "Wretched form! I'll have to buy a nice little gym suit and take some daily exercises." "Can't you take exercises without buying a suit for It?" asked Aunt Jane, who had an idea of economy. "Certain kinds, perhaps," replied Mrs. Merriwid, "that is, of course, If you're not English; but you see, dearie dear-ie T wnnt tn Iparn tr -rootk- nn mv "And when T told Hilda to tell Mr. Jesso that I wasn't at home, you thought I was an absolute falsifier You don't love me, that's what's the matter." Mrs. Merriwid took a clean pocket handkerchief from her bureau drawer, shook it out of its folds and applied it to her eyes. At the same time her shoulders became violently agitated. "Now, Melissa, my dear!" remonstrated remon-strated Aunt Jane. Mrs. Merriwid gurgled. "You know that isn't true, Melissa. Melis-sa. You know that I do love you." Mrs. Merriwid dropped her pocket handkerchief and Jumping up, clasped her relative in a close embrace and waltzed her to the end of the room DnH hflolr Then fihf lot hftr trr nnH hands, and even in the privacy of my own room ahem!" Aunt Jane made sounds expressive of annoyance. "Really," Mra. .JHerrlwld, declared. "I'm not fooling. Don't you think if I were able to do it gracefully it would be a nice way to enter a I room?" I "You mean disgracefully, I think," said Aunt Jane. "No, I don't think it would be a nice way at all." "You would disapprove of somersaults somer-saults rapidly and neatly executed, also, I presume?" "My dear Melissa," said Aunt Jane, "if you wish me to leave the room, say so. plainly, but don't talk that way. It's not ladylike and it's not modest." Mrs. Merriwid puckered her lips and emitted a low, melodious whistle. "Well, it's quite evident you don't approve," ap-prove," she remarked. "We'll have to leave the subject of athletics, then, I suppose. But please tell me, dear auntie, that you believe in a woman having a certain degree of freedom. You don't consider, do you, that she should be tied and trammelled by the began to laugh. "Well, I'm sure!" said Aunt Jane, setting her hair straight. "You darling! How refreshing yod are!" cried Mrs. Merriwid. "You're shade in the desert and claret lemonade lemon-ade to the parched throat. You're the best ever. And I had such a sickly Bession with Mr. Jesso last night. Auntie, dear, do you suppose there's anything more awful in the world than a kindred spirit?" "I hardly understand you, my dear," replied Aunt Jane. "Mr. Jesso opines that he and I are kindred spirits." explained Mrs. Merriwid. Merri-wid. "He bases his opinion on his assurance that he has the same tastes, ideas and convictions that I have. He looks at everything in the same way. He would sympathize with me perfectly perfect-ly If I wanted to walk into a room on my hands. He would walk on his hands by my side if he had a chance or throw somersaults or fits. He wouldn't disapprove of my smoking. He'd lend me his pipe like the gentleman gen-tleman in Mr. Wells' books. He has my ideas on politics and my ideas of religion and high-heeled shoes, .nd if , j Flexed the Biceps of Her Beautifully Rounded Arm. obsolete conventions that have narrowed nar-rowed and cramped her for countless ages?" "If you are alluding to er to corsets, cor-sets, I must say that I consider them both properaad necessary," Aunt Jane answered. "Tight lacing is one thing, and an adequate support that gives trimness to th figure and discourages the indecorous habit of lounging is another." an-other." "Do you think a woman should smoke if she wants to?' asked Mrs. Merriwid. "There you go again!" said Aunt Jane. "1 feel sure 3'ou don't," declared her niece. "As a matter of fact, you disagree dis-agree with me." . "Perhaps not so much as that cigarette cig-arette did," Aunt Jane retorted. "It was my first atempt," said Mrs. Merriwid. "The next time I shall not find it so unpleasant, and after that 1 shall begin to derive enjoyment from the practice. You'll see." "I won't." said Aunt Jane emphatically. emphat-ically. "The. next time it happens, I we were married, our companionship would be so perfect that we would neither of us need to say a single word. We'd just think and the, nod our heads at each other. Na triction, no argument, no rows and no making mak-ing up again." "It would be a peaceful existence," said Aunt Jane. "It would be the very next thing to the silent tomb if it lasted; but to get right down to brast. tacks, it seldom sel-dom does last," said Mrs. Merriwid. "Spirits that are too kindred for any use before marriage soon meet like strangers, afterwards, and you can't tell beforehand what form of disagreement disagree-ment you have to depend on to while away the dragging hours. It's as important im-portant for married people to disagree upon the right things as it is tor them to agree properly. You paste that inside in-side your best hat, dearie. The great thing is to learn to tolerate and even enjoy the stupidity, childishness, weakness, narrowness and blindness j of yiur mate, -,nd prefer them to the j wisdom, liberality and insight of any- happy marriage, auntie." "Well, I suppose you think you know, but' in my cpinior. you are totally to-tally and willfully mistaken," said Aunt Jane. (Copyright, lflirs. hy W. G. Chapman.) siitin iacn. ui li uua tiuu gu i Keokuk on the first train. There are I some things, Melissa, that 1 wiil not conntenance even in you." "A good m.'niy things." said Mrs. Merriwid. pouting. "You certainly don't approve of much that I do or much that I think. You don't like my new shoes." "The heels are positively absurd," Aunt Jane declared. "You dci't like my Easter lily gown or what I said to Hilda when she burned the chops this morning." "Do you think, yourself, you were justified in what you said?" "I think (hose chops would have justified jus-tified anything." said Mrs. Merriwid. "I ought to have thrown them at her. I suppose you don't approve of that" "I decidedly do not," said Aunt lane. |