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Show HY DUNLETS. Hyrum On the Opera. "I've heard about the Ring operas of Wagner's, an' now I've seen one of them, an' it didn't make good with me," said Hyrum dejectedly, "for mine, the great musical comedy." "In the first place, I never liked a fight that ended in one round and that gentle broil in the first act looked like a fake to me. It was fixed with the referee, and I don't blame the other guy for hollering the way he did in the second act." "In the first place they took my season seats fer a couple of matadors in the orchestra, an" naturally nat-urally that made mo sore. They then guaranteed me ringside for two fif, an' I bit. On the square, when I got out of there, I felt like a slap in the face, an' I had to hurry across the street, for I can drink deep of Wagoner's even if his ancestor's music sounds like a buck saw in action. "When Elsie first came in with the klepto-sleeves, klepto-sleeves, I thought we'd get a little dance or something, some-thing, but she acted like the wax works, an' when this feller Lohengrin begin winning her out, I was disgusted. "Next I begin to listen for a tune, but nothin' doing, and I sez to John that I Wouldn't give ten cents on the dollar for every note on the stage In the second act, a fluzie in the balcony got mixed up with a rank outsider, and got turned just before the weddin', but they finally got 'em married, mar-ried, sort of a temperance weddin', an' after taking tak-ing all this trouble to win the baby, the big guy skips out an' leaves Elsie to his little brother. Now you know that ain't right to treat a girl that way, an' it ain't right to put it on the stage. Taint right to let the young folks see it. "But I like the real object of the opera, which is that girls has always got stuck on fig"ers. It was Mr. Lohengrin's flger that won the home with Elsie, an' its figers that gets 'em now. If I had a million" "Good night, Hyrum." "Good night." |