| Show HE KNEW HOW TO PICK THEM Man’a Did Tammany pliment Com Away with Thought of Hostilities The orchestra $as playing loudly In ne of the restaurants In Denver Col during the Democratic national convention and the diners were talking loudly so they- - might hear and be heard At one table sat a beautiful woman and her escort and at the next table a number of Tammany men Suddenly the orchestra stopped bing! and a Tammany man’s voice rang out: "By George that’s a good to meet her’’ like woman! I'd looking The man at the next table who was with the lady came over tapped the Tammany man on the shoulder and said frigidly: “Sir that lady is my wife” “Shake” said the Tammany man 1 am glad to meet you You certainly are a good picker” And hostilities were averted — Post Evening SKIN Baby 1 BARK Boy Had Intense Itching Humor —Scratched Till Blood Ran Found a Cure I AS ROUGH Cutlcura In “Our son two years old was afflicted with a rash After he suffered with the trouble several weeks I took him to the doctor but it got worse The rash ran together and made large blisters The little fellow didn’t want to do anything but scratch and we had to wrap his hands up to keep him from tearing the flesh open till the blood would run The itching was intense The Bkin on his back became bard and rough like the bark of a tree He suffered intensely for about three months ' But I found a remedy In Cuticura Soap and Cutlcura Ointment The result was almost magical That was more than two years not been the slightago and there-haest symptom of it since he was cured J W Lauck Yukon Okla Aug 28 and Sept 17 1908” Potter Drag & Chem Corp Sola Propt Autos to Replace the Last Horse Cars The cars' that Mr Whitridge to experiment with are an electric itorage battery and gasoline motor There is no question about their practicability the receiver says It is simply a matter of deciding which form can be operated the more economically The new experimental cars will seat about 28 persons They will be for purpose of comparison about the size of the cars which the Metropolitan street railway operates on its Eighth street line These are 32 feet in length Some form of automobile car Is also looked upon as the possible solution of the traffic problem on West street where the Metropolitan street railway has always asserted that owing to tl dal effects and the possibility of Bhort the underground circuits therefrom trolley has been Impracticable In addition to all this promised reform the public service commission has granted the Interborough company as extension of 30 days in which to r trains in experiment with the subway so that the center side door train which the Interborough r officials consider superior to the train which has been operated experimentally for some weeks past may be tried cr YORK — It really begins to as though New York intended the lead of every western and discard its horse cars Frederick W Whitridge receiver of the Third avenue and Union railway companies intends to test two automobile cars soon and If it is found they can be operated economically enough it may prove the end of the entire horse car service in the city Receiver Whitridge operates two horse car lines — the Dry Dock East Broadway and Battery and the horBe car branch of the street Manhattanville and St Nicholas avenue line Besides these the Metropolitan company has the Avenue C line the line from the Grand street ferry to the Desbrosses street ferry the Canal and Grand street line the line that runs from street and First avenue to the Battery Cars are also occasionally run on two other lines NEW to follow Soldier of Fortune Forms Fight Trust Boston To Check Spread of Trachoma It has been reported that the disease known as trachoma or granular eyelids has been spreading rapidly To check this among the Indians trouble congress appropriated $12000 APT MELVILLE BOYNTON the placing it in the hands of the commissioner of Indian affairs for the immesoldier of fortune has diate investigation and treatment of announced the formation of a "revoluthe disease and to check its spread tion trust” In New York He says it It purposes to will be Incorporated Sunburnt Eyelids provide fighters dictators and presiWho does not know the misery of sundents in any southern American reburnt eyelids — that crinkly and burning public that needs a rebellion to raise condition of the skin? Isn’t it worth a its taxes or for any North American great deal to know that Dr Mitchell’s that needs a rebellion to corporation Eye Salve applied to them upon retiring secure concessions r will effect a complete cure before morning Capt Boynton it was who a y On sale everywhere Price 25 cents or by ago organized rebellion against mail Ilall & Ruckel New York City tro of Venezuela and had a lo counterfeit Venezuelan money coin Courage here to finance his project “He’s a man of great courage" He was ready to start for South' “Unusual courage?” He Isn’t America with 60 soldiers when th “Yes unusual courage afraid to keep his seat in a street car even if a woman he knows is standing right in front of him" Good— If True A Jersey commuter says that the other day his wife hired a Swedish carpenter to repair some blinds on the outside of "the house When he was at work on a ladder propped up against the side of the building the madame went out to see how he was getting on “Is there anything you need Mr Swenson?" she asked The carpenter gulped once or twice but made no reply The lady repeated the question Again a gulp but no answer “Why don’t you answer me sir?” said the madame indignantly The Swede turned and looked down at her gravely “My : mout’ la full uf sgrewe” he aid "I cannot speag undill I sdal ler some!” Drawing the Line A new authority has decided that “under certain circumstances” a man may play poker with only four cards But If he wants to play with six the player must get his gun out ahead of the other fellow — Boston Herald LIKED WIT OF ARTEMUS Real Auto Poem Arthur Riddle the philosoa poem out of the automo made pher bile as follows: “I like the smell of thd gas so well and the smell of the gasoline and like the purr and electric whirr of th buzzmobile machine What a joy to ride o’er the countryside with a gal as you fly tearing by your ears through space at a wicked pace wlti never a thought of fears Clear out of mind Is the towt behind for nothing la real Indeed but your meteoi red and the road ahead and the dizzy delight of speed— till the sudden shoe) when a cruel rock destroys your dream The car breaks down with a jerk and you walk to town half a day 1st to work’’ — Atlanta Constitution An Important Date “What was the date of the Union the Crowns?” asked an Inspector “1603” he was instantly Informed And why was this date an “Right Important one for you to remember?" “Because you were sure to ask for it" returned the little victim of cramming — Christian Register of TO WARD Londoners for a Wonder Approelated Work of Great American Humorist On the occasion of Artemus Ward’s professional visit to London which occurred not long before his death J E Preston Muddock says In his book “Pages from an Adventurous Life" that the American humorist’s advertisements of his "show” were as full of funny surprises as the lectures themselves One that tickled the general public was this: Artemus Ward Dellvei nd Lectures Before All the Crowned Heads of Ever Thought of Delivering Lectures And an excerpt from his lecture oi “Drawing” Is quoted by Mr Muddocl as a particularly delightful bit “I haven’t distinguished myself at an artist” Ward said 'in his inimitably way “but have always been mixed uj In art I have an uncle who takei photographs in his sane moments any I have a servant who takes every thing he can lay his hands on at an moment “At a very tender age I could drav on wood- - When a mere child I one drew a small of raw turnips over a wooden bridge It was a raw The people of the villagq morning recognized me They said It was a drawing That shows how faithfully I had copied nature I drew their attention to it so you see there was a lot of drawing in it “The villagers with wonderful discernment peculiar to villagers said had a future before me As I was walking backward when I made drawing I replied that I thought that my future must be behind me" f UTAH EDUCATORS The Salt Lake Route Utah’s most popular road announces many rate and dates for east and westbound ex These excursions include curslons attractive water and rail trips ocean voyages and Bide trips to the Alaska Yukon Exposition and other notabl places For the N E A convention at Denver July 6th to 9th all stations 1c Utah will sell round trip tickets also on many other dates low round trip to Denver Cheyenne Pueblo and Colorado Springs The round trip to Los Angeles on days especially suited for teachers on their vacation Is $3000 Tickets also sold returning via San Francisco and Portland Ore and good for ocean trip to Portland Every teacher In Utah should call on the nearest Salt Lake Route agent for full particulars or write to Kenneth C Kerr D P A Salt Lake City who will cheerfully give full Information United States treasury authorities had him arrested No less than 200 Boldiers of fortune Chronic are behind Capt Boynton in the pres “Away down in her heart” said tho ent war trust It Is to be incorporated boarding house philosopher “every under the name of the “Imperial Sol When any woman is a pessimist dlers of Fortune Dragoons” with of calamity happens she always wants to flees In New York know the worst and Isn’t happy until “I have just returned from Canada she hears it” where I have organized a Canadian brigade consisting of 600 war vetFor Better or Worse erans” said the captain “I’m tired of this eternal philosophV’Out of the United States we will ical scrap about the respective Influ— get 3200 more the standing army of ences of heredity and environment” fhe ‘revolution trust’ Then w n a “If says the Philosopher of Folly leader of the Opposition in Ven jela heredity brings a man enough money or Paraguay or Chili or Colombia he can make his own environment” vants to put through a revolution and ' — : :— o b sure to win he’ll come to me and It’s time now to give her that ensay how much he’ll give to be made what he wants to be gagement ring if you are to be man We specially mount a ried In June “If he offers enough we’ll put our Have “We With Us men on Tonight’’ board a boat and go fighting large selection of pure white diadown there and overthrow the governIt is many a year since the countrj monds at a medium price for engage ment He can take the job and pay has laughed over so bright a satirical ment rings Of course we also show us off and we’ll come back and look hit as Mr Samuel G Blythe’s little extremes in size and price but our out for another contract” book “We Have With Us Tonight’ guarantee goes with every one It is his touch of nature that makes ui laugh with him Though a newspapei man by profession —and one of th most highly paid in the country — Mr Most of the men are staid and Blythe has hitherto left the muck-raand seme near the to his less optimistic fellows but this mark but once in a while one of the time the worm has turned and the 170 hapyounger generation essays his hand— less victim Is that "MAIN ST fesusually to his cost however for there tival of gloom the banquet Pub SALT LAKE CITY UTAH is considerable talent represented in lished by Henry Altemus Compar the “regular” contingent Philadelphia Of some of the men it is said that What He Saved A prominent Democratic politician they do not allow business to interfere with checkers but a reliable authority who lived at Allentown was appointed Is especially prepared to meet the to the position of naval officer at Philupon things doing on ’Change stated most exacting Government requirements and its use is peimitted in recently that this was a canard and adelphia during the second Cleveland While in the city he ALL official dippings that on the contrary whenever any- administration made a host of friends and all of his Pure concentrated thing that looked like a deal comes A perfect Sheep Dip A guaranteed waking hours when he was not enin sight the checker enthusiast devremedy for Scab Ticks and Lice otee or expert at once goes and does gaged in official duties were spent Mixes with hard or brackish water with these varigentlemen attending it with as much expedition an des1 to 120 Never injures the animal ous and costly entertainpatch as possible returning tc the mentsInteresting is the official strength At the expiration of his term board for the contest Sometimes it office he returned home and his of COOPER & NEPHEWS WILLIAM is chess but most of the regulars pregood mother who was an Manufacturers fer checkers German woman said to him 177 Illinois Street Chicago Illinois curiously: “John what did you save during the four years you were in office?” HARRY gentleman in a high stock "Mother" he said with a smile ATTORNEY AT LAW seated' in dignity at a table He lighting up his countenance “I accomJudge Building Salt LakoCity was apparently slightly gray and was plished wonders— I Baved my life” Under the picture was the "Andrew Hunter inscription: We Mickle Stock Orders Dependable Mayor of New Handled Information Want Executed York Your on in oil and “And ' his name wasn’t Hunter Busin Markets Prompt 8ervice Margin either” continued the excited individual “It was Hutchins” Mr Adams then proceeded diplomatically to investigate and found that the person who had him in tow was the grandson of Mickle They then started out on a tour of the lower floor of the hall the walls 343 MAIN STREET SALT LAKE CITY of which are covered with the pictures BRANCH OFFICES I EUREKA AND FARK CITY of dead and gone mayors Finally in Our Private Wire Connecte us With the Offices of the Western the office of the bond and warrant clerk Mr Mickle stopped suddenly Development Co American Fork Provo Sprlngville and pointing to a portrait of a dark Spanish Fork Payson Nephl and Ephraim veteran he cried FREE UPON APPLICATION This “That’s him!” How Map High and Low Map picture bore the Inscription: “Maypr of tho of tho To Trad Prices Utah Ilavemeyer Park City In Utah Stocks First Tintle The matter will be straightened out Pour District months ISOS Stocks Camp and the dead mayor’s portrait will IN UTAH BANK ANY REFERENCE: henceforth be properly identified r I t — — Checkers Quiet Nerves of Pit Brokers raOCDGOdS? (K)QQ§ 4 SICK HEADACHE Positively cured by these Little Pills They regulate They also relieve Distress from Dyspepsia Indigestion andToo Hearty A perfect remEating edy for Dizziness NauDrowsiness sea Bad Taste in the Mouth Coated Tongue Pain in the Side TOKPID LIVER the Bowels Purely yegetable SMALL PILL SHALL DOSE "CARTERS ITTLE of and a relaxation from the grind of the work on the floor veterans in the grain trade on the Produce Exchange in New York city take to the good In the game of checkers 'ibrary otherwise known as the read-nroom' just abaft the grain pit one cosey corner is set apart for these devotees of the ancient pastime and at almost every hour of the day there is something doing at one or more of the half dozen boards IVER REFUSE SUBSTITUTES $3250 three of the best plans ever originated to make money eadly and honestly These plans sold for 13250 but we will sell the few we have at 25 cents for the three complete plans One plan made 1150 with 25c capital You get tie three— 13250 worth— for only 25c if you order The National hales Agency Co Sow Box 13 8 tain ford Conn PARKER’S HAIR BALSAM Cleaam and beautifies the halt Promotes a luxuriant growth Haver Pails to Bettors Gray Hair to its Youthful Color Curse eealp diseases a hair lailua WcjandUlOaDrtigtrt Cooper’s Fluid Dip GrandsonofFormerMayorCorrectsError SMALL PRICE Genuine Must Bear Signature PILLS 9 nerves made ragged AS bya steadier the turmoil of the wheat pit and abetted by Chairman of the public service commission the municipal art commission of New York city has been able to put a stop to one of the most flagrant cases of masquerading that has come to light in this city for years A few days ago an excited person rushed into the office of John Quincy Adams secretary of the commission and shouted: “Come with me!” Rather bewildered Mr Adams followed the perturbed one into the lower corridor of the city hall where he was halted before a painting hanging between the two doora of the mayor’s reception room "That's not my grandfather" he ws The secretary surveyed a informed portrait of a rosy AiIDED J ©liild ©ole i ROBINSON ft fi ©ompany BROKERS i if i- is - |
