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Show The Joy ride frequently turns out to be a "fine" thing. Humor as a seventh sense Is good sense not to be disregarded. When ordering hobble skirts specify speci-fy whether they are to force a trot or a pace.- Two New York young men threw dice for a girl. We pity both men and the girl. Any hope Is vain that the new hobble hob-ble skirt la warranted to check extravagance. ex-travagance. A New York woman committed sul clde at 91, proving once more that this Is an impatient age. Sent to prison for an undignified attempt at-tempt at suicide! Did any one ever find a real dignified, means? j The old war between blondes and brunettes Is to he renewed. You can-fiot can-fiot dodgs-iim -issue this time. An Ohio farmer has found that Bnakes destroy potato bugs. We would prefer not to raise potatoes. Another great aviation meet is to be held in France soon. Funeral arrangements ar-rangements have not been made. Each new Gotham breach of prom-- prom-- ... Jse suit seems to produce mushier love letters than any marked Exhibit A before. be-fore. i French telephone girls say "I listen." The American kind couldn't do that without telling whoppers, now and then. 1 A horse named Big Stick has re- .cently been winning- races. With that name the horse simply had to win. "The meaning of money" Is a new book. Most people disclaim , the need of book knowledge on that subject Sailors on a German ship mutinied recently because the food was poor. This should serve as a warning to the managers of some of the summer resort re-sort hotels. - A Pueblo (Col.) educator says every child is born a liar. But let . blm cheer up. Some of them outgrow out-grow It. 'Flirting," says an eminent educator, educa-tor, "is woman's safety valve." Does safety valve have a siren attachment? German gun factories are Bwamped with orders, in spite of the fact that aeroplanes are about to make war Impossible. Im-possible. With no kissing in moving pictures, pic-tures, parks, street cars and publio railway stations, where is a poor fellow fel-low going to? We may need a two and one-half-cent piece, but we certainly allowed the three-cent piece to perish in in-ccuous in-ccuous desuetude. "Smile, when you get up In the looming," advises an optimist But ou'd better straighten out your face "While you're shaving. A Pennsylvania woman, aged 83 took her first ride on a train the other oth-er day She may be expected to tackle bicycle riding next. A substitute for radium Is beine offered, so be sure, when you order to get the original, with the maker's came blown upon the bottle. Thanks to the general use of the typewriter, the newspaper editor very seldom now sticks his mucilage brush into the Ink bottle, as heused to do One of the college professors thinks r.s giggle because they are P s- We have always supposed they did ,t merely because they felt foolish. 7 Ielt Two New York men shook dice to decide which should have the glr the oved. It doesn't sound half as roman7 tic as the old-fashioned duel Tlth words or pistols. One of the aviators has been r, tifled by his wife that he must quH flying high or she will get a divorce When laet heard from he Torce oiling the propeller shaft. The boll weevil scare is rifo in the southwestern cotton s ates C intelligent authorities in thTSecUon Persist in classifying that insect in Popular entomology as a humbu |