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Show |OEST AND JOHN REINER parents, but they're always busy working. I don’t see them very much.Soit’s very hardfor me to open up andsaythings. If they came up to me, like out of the blue, and saw that I was bothered by something and asked me about it, wouldn't say a word tothem. Because it'd be weird, you know? At New Utrecht High School in Brooklyn, N.¥., | talked with Vincenzo “Vinny” Ragusa, 16, Jaclyn “Jackie” Ferrara, 15, Nikole Mastroianni, 17, EugeniaTan, 16, Anthony Lupo, 17, Jessica Trinidad, 16. AjayaWilliams, 17, and Robert “Bobby” Reichner, 17. Lynn Minton: What's the best— and worst—thing parents do when they try to connect with you? LM: What’s the bestthing they coulddoif they wanted to connect with you? Eugenia: Just being able to see each other more ona daily ba- sis. Just getting more familiar with each other. Anthony: The most important thing aparent cansay to a child is, “I love you,” becauseit makes the child feel wanted. It makesthe child know that “my mom and dad are happy I'mpart oftheir life.” vessica: Onething myparents do Vinny: The age they try to con- that I tell themdont dois, when- nect with you. Some parents everI talk to them—like, “Oh, this won'tevenreally talk to youun- til you're a teenager and might be going off-track. But then you don’t have the samerespect for them Whenyoutalk with your parents asakid, youtell them everything | as you along. Yougetusedto it. My parents, they started talk- ing seriously to me now, I can’t tell them everything I do. If they would havetalked to me when I was youn, id bedifferent Jackie: The way they act. Sometimes they'll tell you not to do something, then they'll go and do what they told you not to do. Nikole: My mother is like my best friend, Asidefrombeinga parent andgiving merules andregula tions to go by, shetreats melike I'ma humanbeing, you know? She's not like, “This is what you have to do, andthat’s it.” | can tell her pretty much anything happened today”—they end up lecturing me, telling me something I did wrong. I say, “I'mtalkingto youas myfriend. My friends don’t lecture me. I don’t want to belectured.” And they'retrying tostop. So, I'mtelling themalot, everything that goes on with me. Ajaya: I'd say to parents: Don’t try so hard to “understand” or “fix” something. Just bethereto listen. Yes, give me your input But not to where youtell me ex actly what to do. And while I'm talking. don’t belike, “Okay, wait’—andthentell me every thing. No. Listen first. Otherwise it gets imitating, andthe next time I won't come to you andtell you Bobby: Thebest thing parents can do is trust their kids, If they're confident they raised them right then they should trust them. Vinny: Givingtotal trustis the andshe doesn't flip out if I've worst thing they can do. done something wrong. Sheun: derstands, and she'll try to dis: cuss it, [fT don’t want to, she’s like, “Fine. At least you told me. shouldtrust their kidsto an extent, Eugenia; My parents are good They Butif youtell your parents, “I'm going to a keg party, but | promise 1 won't drink anything,” thenit's ridiculous for them to trust you. i r TEENAGERS AND PARENTS: WHAT DO YOU THINK? Hwe yourcommentsyout win the “Fresh Voloss” Tsand o-mail to “The only thing | miss about the '70s is the "60s nostalgia.” |