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Show 12 Vernal Express Wednesday, August 24, 1994 Menial Health by Dr. Val Farmer Taming the Green-Eyed Monster AC How can a hard working, steady, generally levelheaded man lose his cool and become irrational and obsessed ob-sessed to the point of driving away someone he loves? Meet Dan and Nikki - not their real names of course. Dan is a reserved man, a bedrock of strength and virtue. He is loyal and dedicated, a plodding man who advanced himself through sheer effort ef-fort and determination. He had a hard childhood that he doesn't talk much about. Nikki was Dan's opposite. She had an easy way with people. She was exuberant, fun-loving and wore her emotions on her sleeve. Her joy of life was contagious. Dan was reminded re-minded of this at social gatherings when Nikki displayed a magnetic effect on others. Dan is jealous of how Nikki acts in public. He doesn't like to go out. It's a downer - he gets into dark and ugly moods. He wants some of the attention she gives to others. He feels slighted. It's worse after a few drinks. He finds fault with Nikki's friendliness and gives her the third degree about her actions and conversations. con-versations. Nikki doesn't think twice about her motives. She resents having to explain her innocent behavior. Dan's accusations seem groundless and absurd. Attempts to reassure Dan doesn't stop his jealousy. Every occasion has potential for disaster -on the spot or when they get home. Nikki resents his control and chooses to defy him. She goes out with her friends or to activities just to prove she has the right to do so. To avoid unpleasant clashes, Nikki withholds information or tells a few "white lies." This backfires. When Dan "catches her," his worst fears are confirmed and the pressure intensifies. in-tensifies. This panics Dan even more. He wears her out with his endless accusations accu-sations and questions. Nikki is severely depressed. She can't go on this way. She's losing her love for Dan. The man she counted on for stability and good judgment is falling apart. She wants out In a strange way, Dan is causing caus-ing the thing he fears most - losing Nikki. Where does jealousy come from? At the heart of jealousy in a crisis of self-esteem. Nikki's effervescent personality and smooth social skills were quite a contrast to Dan's reserved, re-served, introverted manner. Somehow he always felt she was better than he and he was lucky to have her. Worse, he imagined that someone better would come along and he would lose her. Since Dan didn't trust his hold on Nikki's love, he became obsessed with keeping potential rivals out of her life. His suspicious interrogations, interroga-tions, wild accusations and control were efforts to fend off threatening relationships before they could get started. He treated Nikki like a possession pos-session he was going to keep at all costs. What Dan feared, happened -Nikki pulled away. He still can't fathom that it was his control and jealousy that drove Nikki away - not her discovering someone better. Advice for Dan. Dan needs to hear again the story of their courtship and all the qualities that attracted Nikki to him in the first place. In the mysteries of courtship, couples match up emotionally, spiritually and intellectually. Nikki saw in Dan qualities she admired, appreciated and loved. His strength and steadiness steadi-ness appealed to her. How he was then and how he is now - minus the jealousy - is good enough. Dan has to trust his own desirability - something Nikki believes be-lieves more than he. Her efforts to reassure him of her love have been ignored. Perhaps a counselor can help Dan overcome his crisis of self-esteem. His self-confidence is a key to letting let-ting go of his fears. He needs an attitude at-titude that Nikki is just as lucky to be with him as he is to be with her. It was that independence and self-assurance self-assurance that drew Nikki to him in their courtship. Dan is worrying too much about himself and his needs. Besides his fear, his self-centercdness has become be-come a problem. Can he get back to caring about her instead of worrying about himself? Dan needs to refocus his attention on meeting Nikki's needs. He needs to lighten up, listen to her feelings, go out of his way for her in a non-smothering non-smothering way and make life pleasant again. Their relationship needs some lighthcartcd fun instead of a heavy atmosphere of conflict and control. Nikki needs freedom and trust Dan can win her back by letting go. No amount of force or pressure will keep her. She will love him or she won't. By exerting less control, Dan can get back to being himself - the self that won Nikki's heart in the first place. b)M':-Your. . 1V Health Look out for bicyclists By Gloria Johnson Uintah Basin Public Health Department 'Stop!'' "Watch out!" "Look both ways before you go into the street!" Watching young children ride bicycles bi-cycles is nerve racking at limes, f rankly, I am surprised we havcn'i had a worse accident then what we have Had. I am also really pleased with the child's skill advancement However, I retognie thai being able la syy on Use bicycle going over curbs ts not all there is Id tiding tid-ing a bike. I got a new bike, and helmet this year my If, I had never worn a beb met before, but after thu summer, I wcft'l ride without one. Do vert arc j oblivious, or in with a hurry, that hke riding is quite dangeroui. If it dafgerous t an &4!t thai is tuned in to the nuances of traffic, iiiT3?ne the fnk Ut you cbiliren who have no real idea aHut the dif'gcr of f watching where the tars are, where thry are f ??, and whether they zm ec the hie ft:t. mr$. thiMrtn tan be lauhl to k bmh way and to at stop pgnK, but tevclf thrntaJly they are 04 where fcfaf adufu in hodhff tftfj-l4.atcd traffc ntUni Chillrcn a! fct into the Tkr Ite kkt" twntatity. Tti H Hcte t,Vy jyt flkjw Ch wkl ithrsl bk:tfg to if H is ItaSfy H the ikvtpm is tKat if wc trk it, we'll g?! wvalfi it fejt?iat aria art ttr-fctwsi hrajse rl f cl Mfsty f t ri4.n. I tow mhfn tM4rtt are rlr-l their htti II Jtt4 t rt-fcM?al rt-fcM?al mK t.Vrt i f f I deal rl bffit tfrVJt! ptH Ii a fatty tWi tstirt!i cM fi artm. t4il the tm fkm fJ ttt H Iran? w sit Mr m tfr H)-- mi la few tr tr!? to grSi, gn Mw rf$ et hv-rV hv-rV As a p9V4., t?t ,fwi? Mfr4 gf r(t fnke$ - tf ih tl t hf.vt tntf t Community Calendar August 21 through 25 The Vernal church of Christ will hold a free "Crusade for Christ" from 7;30 p.m. to 8.30 p.m. at the Vernal Junior High School auditorium. audi-torium. Evangelist Maxre Ooren of Ft. Worth, Texas wiB be the speaker. Call 789 0S27 lor more Informal cn. August 25 Ashley Valley High School will be the sue of YE S , Youth Educational Services, with a presentation from 7 p m. lo 8 p m. and personal interviews and &m assessment at 8 pm. August 27 and 29 Basin youth foosbaS sn ups wp be from 10 am to 1 pm. on Saturday. Aug, 27 and 5 pm to 7 p m on Monday, Aug, 21 be hind trve Vernal Junkr High School Ap 9 Itwrnh 13 wn be accepted and ihe te Is 160 tor each payr, Septcmoef S School svia be diimiised tor the labor 0y To pises an itm on m Cowny Calendar, ti Umm Momion eft me Vernal Eprt$i, ?m 3SI1, A mm ni-.i b et &mfnuny--wide mm& and tni Msfcl 10 tt Schell named best teacher Willi! St Kit. aj-tk siSiwW tmt aM lrltofy i?rm.to t Mnda H SttK4, w m tmm4 ihe Cstvit Tcff:f HT by 0e Nwvl As.M ! a-i tssi r4 8 S-Ht) Mlfrs fit tt it ttf ArtJt Vft I Hhr Ifljc f . tie hm dm hm tmteti 14 $f 4 ?Att) fu pav$4 l -5, ff t- vi w b fnrwiriM to fr Cf. ttM f pt i lljrn t. hH Hl w t-fl t-fl Inf to t?5 S.tl) t, f". 5 y-tr fwi tr tr frirn. f Si paJNi nieyA- kM trrs m S, ?r-fN"! ?r-fN"! i p INI ! jefdi h S & li fe WEBER STATE University's Associate Degree Nursing class of 1994 includes, (back row), Laura Mahler, instructor; Jo-Ann Durbin, Pennie Johnson, Mary Beth Dean, Roger Burton, Sharon Conder, Tina Winn, Jo Holmes, instructor; instruc-tor; (front row), Tiffany Bailey, Alys Mansfield, Cheryl Guinn, Inella Bastian, Teresa Haslem, Jennie Brotherson and Thea Atkins. inwiiissMHHMaBinsw w B BB-B Bi ii " SI S1! l-W,- ,! ' '-j r m .m I bn a il .... Ii' i 1 1 L SHERRY STETTLER and Becky Jackson accept to right), Jean Staten, Nancy Grua, lone donations of medicine cart and CPR mannequin Williams and Wilma Webb, from members of the Pink Ladies Auxiliary: (left Pmh Ladlaes dloirDafte miew eqyfipinmeirDti to DuosipDaD Over S2.600 in equipment was donated this week to Ashley Valley Medical Center by its Pink Ladies Auxiliary. The two items, an electronic elec-tronic medicine cart for the emergency emer-gency room and a CPR mannequin, was greatly needed, stated Sherry Stealer, director of nursing. Becky Jackson, registered nurse, accepted the medicine can on behalf be-half of Virginia Ewcll, emergency room department head. She said the locking medicine cart will replace one the ER uses that has been in the department since before the hospital was remodeled and it was operated by the county. The CPR mannequin will be used as a training device to recertify all medical personnel in the hospital annually on CPR, dcfibulation and intubation. According to Mrs. Wilma Webb, the proceeds used to purchase the equipment came from the pop, snack and candy machines placed throughout the hospital. In addition to the equipment donation, do-nation, the Pink Ladies also provide stuffed animals to every child in the hospital under the age of 6 and gifts to newborn babies. 4-H horse club ends season I The Uintah County 4-H horse club had a busy month In July. They hosted a horse show July 20 and 21 at the Western park. Event were show manvhip at halter, wttfem hmcmanvhip, trail class, barrels, pole bending, quadntnqu suie race and a whiten test Ibgh point wrre tamed by: 9 to 11 age tttj Junior lkwer, Jocelyn Wubnk, Jariet !tomV; 12 to 13 me frmip, Valarie Gincs, MeUtnie Otncs ft4 Angela CaWwcIl; and 14 to 19 year old Heather IMbs, Lorra Terry aJvd AmtU CakUtll. Crusade set for mid-September Evfc?.Jf!, Wfig ttHUJtw Will l U4 rt sfcalte at V VteH Ctu'-k tonwire4 by. I'm ft.ict Chmh m tV ftis.k wi he Sffi, H 1hm$H $t II m 7 pi. rh ffit m fre toc.im tvi, U A&am to tw, HL ll ifftf m tl sf4 f ftiit CVf s ww J. tfMlig,, imi h-fe A4r.twi M Several 4-Hcrs were in attendance fc a service project picking up rocks and debris from the small arena are-na prior to the hone show. Also In July, the hose club sent a representation of the senior members mem-bers to a state competition held in Logan. The three day event hosted all Utah counties and included a horse judging competition as w-cll as a horse "knowledge bowl." Uintah county's competitor w-erc: Heather Hobbs, Jack! Ctnes and Lorra Terry. Even though they were one penwn short of a four-pmon team, they did wclL They placed in the top five in the knowledge bowl and fourth in the judging. The last horse show in the season was held in conjunction with the Uintah County Fair. Events were the same and the July 2(Hh show and high point were earned by: 9 10 11 age group, Jocclyrt Witbeck, Jarkl Homxkt, Junior Bonner, 12 to 13 age group, Angela Caldwttl, Aubry Young and Mclanie Grnes; 14 to 17 age group, Jacii Grnes, Heathef Hibbs and Amanda Caldwell. 7Vxtc& fat OMlltif VciUl AMI.. Wlialovcr you nro wanting to buy or sell! Express Itififtf thfftt OEVIATCO HALLUX A tJef??ed s If bit IpS se tt&4 te94 UN < tW3 i!J&tm ps4Fl t& to 9 ptfwl tHjs ti feet sdfe tyt if few, tie m s3 $ pv$$ agnsl ihe U Tfcatmtnt: MdHui O&teotomy r fctg . t bsrse s tegg? ari i & &sr U rotlow-up Cirtt &rt f tons tje Ofet. eirg sew , nr ,llll.lil,.,,,inpll;l 4 ML Tt . Lt7ni qgJTMlguBI ijtliMe its 1 ""it ' 1 "" "ir"1 |