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Show Parents' dpra Problems By DONALD M. MAYNARD If you have a question about your child from infancy in-fancy through the teens send it to Donald M. Mayn-ard. Mayn-ard. 810 Broadway, Nashville 2, Tennessee, to be answered through a future column. too self-conscious about it. . THEY MUST GIGGLE "Our 5 year-old started to kindergarten recently and up to . then had been a very quiet, ! ladylike child and could sit still 1 if she had to, but now she has i become so loud and giggles loud at things that aren't funny. The ' more we try to calm her down 1 the more antagonized she gets ! and pouts (at which we pay no attention) until she starts in all over again being loud. Is it because be-cause she has to be still for almost al-most four hours every morning? What can I do to make her into the sweet, quiet little girl we used to have?" You certainly are right when you pay no attention to your daughter's pouting. I am wondering, won-dering, however, if you are not expecting too much of a 5-year-old when you ask her to be a "very quiet, ladylike child." I am sure you. want your daughter to be a normal, wholesome whole-some 5-year-old girl, and to be "quiet and ladylike" is to ask of her behavior that is suitable for an adult but not suitable I for one of her age. In fact, you should rejoice at a certain amount of giggling and loud behavior, be-havior, even though it may be somewhat irritating to you. There are many reasons for this change in your daughter. ( If she has been an only child and has not had too many playmates play-mates of her own age, the experiences ex-periences in the kindergarten are new and exciting. Certainly Certain-ly she is not kept still for the four morning hours. She is with children who laugh and giggle, and who may be at times loud and boisterous. Since she has been so "quiet and ladylike," she may be having hav-ing some difficulty in learning to adjust to the other children; in fact, she may be imposed upon by them. ' Consequently, she is under a more or less ner- PECULIARM MANNERISMS "Our fourth child, age six, has shown very unusual powers of concentration. But with this concentration she slants her head, looks out of the corners of her eyes, draws the corners of her mouth down. My husband hus-band and I felt her ability one to be cherished and ignored the mannerisms, thinking she would outgrow it. It has persisted several sev-eral years, though it happens less frequently and for a shorter short-er period. Many people, including in-cluding her teacher, believe she should be stopped when detected. detect-ed. It became a joke to the older children when the teacher teach-er would exclaim, "Eileen, don't look like that!" She just smiles when her attention is drawn to it, but, of course, the thought has disappeared, too." You are justified in being pleased with the ability of your 6-year-old daughter to concen trate and you need not be overly concerned about the mannerism that accompanies the concentration. concentra-tion. It may be that the mannerism is more undesirable than your description indicates, . but if it seems to be used less and less frequently, it is likely that the more unattractive features of it will be eliminated in time. Since the comment of the teacher teach-er doesn't seem to bother her, you have nothing about which to worry at that point. Guard against commenting upon her ability to others when she is present, lest she become imagination and that which is literally true. At any rate, your son is now six, the age that Gesell calls the "transition age," when he is becoming be-coming increasingly conscious of himself and correspondingly impatinet with criticism or correction. cor-rection. I would be inclined, if I were you, to make on special comment com-ment upon his wild tales, other than perhaps, "Is that so?" or : "Isn't that interesting?" and let it go at that. It is likely that if you do not seem astonished or disturbed by them, and give him neither reproof nor praise because of them, he gradually will resort to them less and less in his conversation. In all probability, prob-ability, therefore, you are right in feeling this is not a serious problem. I am assuming that the wild tales are not deliberate lies for the purpose of deceiving you as to what is happening at school If he is trying to deceive you, you need to find out why he feels this is necessary. Are you expecting too much of him at school? Are there other children chil-dren in the family that may be getting more attention than ha is? Are you giving him , the affection and understanding that he needs? Is the family having many happy experiences together? vous tension while at kindergarten, kinder-garten, and when she gets home this tension expresses itself in the type of behavior you deplore. de-plore. Nervous tension brings about fatigue and a child who is tired frequently giggles at things that are not funny. Be sure she gets plenty of rest. WILD AND WOOLY TALES "My 6-year-old son has a vivid imagination. In the past when he has come from school with wild tales I've listened and then pointed out that it was a tale. , Lately he tries to convince con-vince me that it's the truth. I've tried to show him that invention is fun but it's important that he tell the truth when questioned. I don't consider it a serious problem but don't want it to become be-come one. What can you suggest? sug-gest? It seems to mesyou have handled han-dled the situation very well in the past and that by now your son probably knows the difference differ-ence between his flights of |