OCR Text |
Show JIMMY, THE NEWSBOY, AT THE HELLO GIRLS' BALL Sarah, an' Maude, an' Helena, an' Lucille, Lu-cille, an' Norlnne, an' Amelia, an' Josephine, Jo-sephine, an Victoria, an', an' "Wofs dat you say? Where was plain Mary and Katie and Clara? Say on de level, wouldn't dose names look nice an' dandy on de score card dat each guy keeps tally on of de races I mean de dances?. Don't you know dat even If de old folks at home did tag a sol Mas and Lis dat dose names are cut out when dey git out in de lime light. Dey, all. grabs off some name like THortensa' or 'Esmeralda' or 'lima' or somethln. dat sounds like babblln' brooks, kind of romantic like. Are you on now? "A goll may be plain 'Sal O'Brien' aroun' home, but when she hits the low neck dress she's nothing but "Miss Beatrice Be-atrice Obray' and dat's no idle dream at dat. . "But say, deyre great, all right, all right I was dere v. id me fine scenery on. None of dem thot I waa only a newsboy. I hangs out a JIne lot of talk to one goll dat I was out to win. Bay, she looks me cold In de eye and cays, 'Kid, ring off, you're line's twisted.' twist-ed.' ("Den I tumbled and rets along fine. 'Hello,' I says to one peach. 'Hello yourself,' she says; 'what number does you want? 'You're the number. I'm lookln' for,' says I. 'Wrong call,' she says, sweet like; 'call - Information 7 "Did I have a good time? Well, I'm all In, aU right, all right." said Jimmy, the newsboy, when he met The Tele-gram Tele-gram man today. "Was I In a buxx wagon amaah up? Naw, not a bltof me there. I was up doin' me prettiest at the 'Hello' ball last night. Don't know wot dat Is? Say, where are you from, Pocatello?TotrTe; a Ruben lor fair or are you stiingin' me. I'm wise now. Well, if dls suits you better, I attended de first annual ball of the telephone goils last night. Does dat let a dent in your thinker? "Was it great? Say, you've read about dat old guy Hellogabalus dat used to lead the grand march at all the swell affairs in old Rome, haven't you? Well, dis ball put his rackets on the griddle. Dis was de goods that pulls down the high card. Who did I meet? Say, dere was every dne dere. from wine agents to married men dat had important meetings to attend to at de lodge. Are- you wise? Ignorance la bliss, all right, ain't it, though? "Say, I met Ma me, an Agnes, an' Pearl, an' Gwendolynne. an' Edythe, an' Myrtle, an' Louise, an' Marguerite, an' Madge, an' Francis, an' Helen, an' Elisabeth, an' Florence, an' Lillian, an' Blanche, an' Adele. an Jeanne, an desk.' Say; can t dem soils Jolly a feller awful and me only eighteen, too? But say, dey likes to take advantage of poor guy dat don't know not hi n', don't dey? . ' "But I breaks in several times on de connection all right and was dere with the trpalcoraln art. Bay, I learnt dat word up dere from "one of de peaches. It means throwin' your feet to music, see. I twirled aroun' enough up dere to do for a top, but say, It's great sport. But I hsd to do one thing; all right. 1 had to dance with dark-haired goils all night. You see me steady has black hair and I couldn't risk any chances dancln' with de goils dat have hair the color of a lemon merengue pie. Gee, even us newsies have our troubles, too, eh? "Den corny the supper. Say, I never eats so much in me whole loife. I had three and four helplns' of each dish. "Say. but dey give me the haw-haw for fair at de finish and I ain't wise yet It was like dis. I admits I was doln' a heavy stunt In de eatln line, but wot was de food dere for, anyway? ."I got mine, all right all right "Well. tut I was tellin' you It was like dls. After I had kept two waiters doing the Paul Revere on foot and hlkln' back and forth to the kitchen for more food for me for some time, I was get tin' quiteta foundation laid away. Finally one of de goils says to me kitten-like: Won't you please have some dessert? Please do.' She spoke so. soft-like I fell Into the trap. 'What will you have,' she murmurs low-like, 'for dessert?' des-sert?' " 'Well, if you insist,' I says, Just as low, If you Insist I takes somethln' for dessert I'll have another helpin' of ham and eggs.' Gee, you ought to have heard dem laff. On de level, where does the giddy yell come in dere? - ."Tonight me and me opera glasses for the 'Mother Juice' show. Say. ain't I this society, gag' hard on de constitution? constitu-tion? I'm glad Lent's here. S'long." |