Show Simons Smon's Retirement Puts Fight Mob in Quandary By JACK GUENTHER NEW YORK April 21 UP There UP-There There is an unemployment problem of considerable magnitude confronting the nation today Abe Simon the unfrocked ked has hung up his gloves rolled up his robe and kissed the boys along Lammers' Lammers Lane a sad ad adI good From now on he will expose his chin to nothing m more re I lethal than soap water and a safety razor His decision to quit boxing was reached suddenly and it was based upon reasons both physical and mental Simon supposedly has been annoyed for some time now by a mysterious back ailment and it is reported also that his red- red haired bride feared for his state of mind if he continued to be punched about at the current rate of exchange Small Future Just Must what line of endeavor Si Simon Simon Simon Si- Si mon will turn to is a moot point isn't He-isn't qualified for many jobs as his life has been devoted to the ring ice wagons and pound pickle barrels He is too big for the army and navy Boris Karloff has a monopoly on the fright market and the Kentucky derby nominations were closed more than two months ago Abe is out of practice on his violin he is too old for professional professional professional football and he is a bit on the large size for most offices The coast guard could settle the problem nicely by handing him a lantern stationing him somewhere along the Atlantic seaboard and using him for a lighthouse The job wouldn't pay much but Abe would get a chance to stand up Simon himself isn't particular what he does so 50 long as he finds something that is remunerative and is accompanied by a little action Actually the closest I can come to thinking of a job that thatis is both remunerative and is accompanied accompanied accompanied ac ac- ac- ac companied by action is boxing In Abes Abe's case ease six months more of boxing would be particularly remunerative remunerative remunerative re re- re- re and active Some Excitement But Simon claims he has retired and the news has has caused more consternation consternation consternation con con- along Lammers' Lammers Lane than the unexpected appearance of a bill collector The citizens of this old street great hands hands' at putting two and two together and arriving at are even now raking over the ashes of the past months month's events to find the real reason for the retirement It seems that as recently as Sunday Abraham appeared on a aradio aradio aradio radio show informed his constituents constituents constituents he never felt better and elaborated quite somewhat as to how he would chill Harry Bobo Lou Nova and two other worthies he is scheduled to meet It also alo seems relations between Abes Abe's new papa-in-law papa and Manager J. J J. J Johnston are considerably strained Papa-in-law Papa was the gent who attempted to teach Abraham jiu- jiu jitsu who attempted to crash his corner in the Louis bout and who was told off in no uncertain terms by the head of the Johnston Cor- Cor portion Ltd Since Abe is in a position to earn in the four scheduled bouts it may be that papa-in-law papa wants to keep the money in the family No He could do that if Abes Abe's manager manager manager man man- ager didn't happen to be Mr Johnston Johnston Johnston John John- ston but a phoney retirement retirement- if it is phoney would phoney-would would cut no figure figure figure fig fig- ure with the Boy Bandit Jimmy is a mean man with a contract I would say Simon has no more chance of obtaining his release than a Republican who has been convicted of stuffing a ballot box in Montgomery Ala h These ese matters are the product I of sheer rumor and are offered only for what they are worth as riddles Certainly it is possible Abes Abe's back has been legitimately knocked askew and certainly he wont won't improve his lightning calculation car car- exercises if he absorbs another such beating as Louis handed him the second time around a month ago It is to be hoped Abes Abe's retirement retirement retirement retire retire- ment involves more larceny than injury It would be indeed sad if the big amiable and thoroughly personable young man were the victim of a serious ailment But since the doctor explained that he suffered even before the Louis fight Abe cant can't be ailing to any great degree He was much too strong against the champ for that He was so strong I hope he isn't leaving us for good Against men of his own caliber he was a passable passable passable pass pass- able fighter it was just his bad luck to be tossed in against the champion when he had nothing but heart and determination Just who will fill his place against Bobo and Nova isn't known Mike Ja Jacobs Jacobs Jacobs cobs says if he cant can't find anyone to meet Nova he may fight him himself Well I dont don't often pay to see fights but Id I'd spend to see that |