Show DISPERSiNG A TRAMP I I was eating dinner at a farmhouse in Indiana when one of the children came in and announced a highway tramp had called at the kitchen door and asked for a bite to eat The farmer was a very fat very short and blackheaded man and he was postmaster at the corners and justice of the peace in and of tho county He had a son called James another called Moses and a hired man who was addressed as Trowser He sent out word lor the tramp to sit down and rest and as a laugh went around the table he explained j After dinner I shall be pleased to show you how we encourage tramps in this section sec-tion This is evidently a new man to this part of the statetif he would never have called hereAfter A here-After dinner we went out The tramp was sitting under cherry tree looking as comfortable as you please and evidently unsuspicious that anything except dinner was in store for him He looked to me like a bad man to fool with but the farmer didnt seem to read him that way Now then he said as he rubbed his fat hands together you will stand up Whatfuri asked the tramp To be kicked I I am going to boot you from this spot down to that slivered telephone tele-phone pole But I object Cant help that As a fourthclass postmaster post-master of the United States of America I command you to arise If I am kicked somebody else will get hurt cautioned the tramp as he got up As one of the justices j of the peace in and for this couoty 1 commend you to disperse said tho farmer as he turned the tramp toward the gate and administered a kick Next instant he received a lefthander on the nose which knocked hin in to confused con-fused heap on the grass and the tramp got out of his old coat and prepared for business bus-iness Trewser pulverize him I shouted the farmer as he struggled to his knees In the name of the United States I command you to knock him down I Trowser advanced his big fists doubled up but the tramp danced to the right and the left and then sent in one on the hired mans commissary department which doub led him up and laid him among the hOllyhocks hOlly-hocks James Moses make him a prisoner yelled the oldman as b6 plucked a handful of grass and held it to his bleeding nose The tramp chuckled There was fun ahead The two boy were strapping young fellows fel-lows strong enough to knock down an ox and they were willing to go in As they stripped off the tramp backed up between two current bushes where they could not lank him and as they advanced upon him he grinned all over He played with them for a minute or two and then drew a long breath made three or four feints and piled them on the grass together Neither moved to get up for full two minutes Meanwhile the tramp rested and looked over to me and queried Yon aint one of the crowd No And dont want me to disperse 1 Not particularly All right I dont think the United States and his gang want anything more of me just now and as I have an engagement engage-ment down the road Ill move on When they get washed up and the bandages on tell em I used to scrap with the boys in Chicago in days gone by and that I held myself in and letem off very mild Goody > Good-y stranger Ta ta old fatty And he had not been gone ten minutes before the postmaster came over to me and whispered Did you everlNew York Sun |