Show HUMOR OF TIlE HOUR You are charged with vagrancy You never do anything but beg said a New York justice to a shabbylooking prisoner prison-er TrampYou do me great Injustice your honor I steal every chance I get and I gamble too occasionally JudgeI beg your pardon I had no idea you were so respectable I hope you will excuse me I am very sorry TrampWell you neednt carry the thing too far judge I dont claim to bean be-an alderman Texas Sittings A bright girl returning from school was asked by her father what she had been learning that morning All of us been learning to spell said she What did you learn to spell Learned to spell rat Well how do you spell Tat Rat rat V V Now how do you spell mouse Just the same way only In smaller letters said the little maldHarpers Magazine V What did the Clarion editor fire his compositor for Too close an adherence to historical fact I guess The editor wrote a joke and dated it 1930 and the compositor dated it 1650the date it originally appeared ap-peared Cincinnati Enquirer Willie didnt I ask you to make less noise said Mrs Sill at the dinner tableYes Yes you did mamma Well I will have to ask you again Remember mamma you told me it was impolite to ask for anything twice at the table Yonkers Statesman r Only think of it V It is said that in 100 years the lion will be extinct Then the poor lamb will have to He down all by Its lonesome Isnt It awful to think of V Boston Transcript V I NurseIts a boy sir I College Professor abstractedly Ah i tell him to come tomorrow after recitation recita-tion New York Press I Old Stage HandWheres the property mouse New Stage HandThe property mouse Old Stage HandYes the mouse they turn loose on the stage when the prima donna wants to take high CDetroit Tribune What are you doing here asked the park policeman shaking the tramp on the bench Im lookin for work boss replied the traveler rubbing his halfopened eyesWhy you were asleep Yes boss I was but you see Im a clairvoyant and I allus goes to sleep when I workYonkers Statesman My young friend said the cornfed philosopher to the brandnew graduate while there are doubtless countless positions posi-tions that you are fit for it is well to remember re-member that the soft job is not so apt to fall to the man whos fit for it as to the man whos fought for it Indianapolis Journal |