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Show IIVolume II, Issue X THE OGDEN VALLEY NEWS Page 11 15 May 2000 Clean Up the Abuse By Janet Hoffmann A friend recently told me that she hadn’t got what she bargained for in a husband. I reminded her that our husbands didn’t get what they bargained for either. This week as I watched another son get married, I thought about what an awakening we all have after a few months of marriage. I don’t believe that we really think our mates are perfect but I do believe we have some illusions about who they really are. Our initial impressions are usually positive but after our mate disappoints us a few times, our mirage takes a twist. The time we spend reflecting on their positive characteristics decreases, while we increasingly dwell on their negative traits as they surface one by one. We forget to remember who our partners really are, blinded by only the negative. Keeping this balance is the trick to a happy marriage. After marriage, faults in our partner do seem to surface. Then we think we didn’t get what we bargained for but the bartering isn’t over. We should talk about what we don’t appreciate in our marriage but never do it in a moment of anger. Anger can’t be trusted. Wait until the anger has dissipated to discuss what is bothering you or your partner. Anger blows off steam, not always truths. Sometimes what is said in anger is true, but it is usually exaggerated. Even if it is true, it was offered in an unacceptable form. Anger is an emotion that should stay out of our homes. I don’t know any good that comes from it. I’ve heard many reasons for an individual’s wrath, but I’ve never agreed with any of them. Anger brings with it abuse. Abuse in a marriage is something that needs immediate attention. Most people abuse others in some way or another. The challenge is to get rid of all abusive behaviors (manipulation, bribery, withholding love, unwillingness to forgive, humiliation . . . the list goes on and on). Newlyweds, especially, should listen to each other with an open mind and heart and make goals to improve yourself—not your mate or others. When someone around you displays abusive behavior, let them know that you love them but you won’t tolerate the abuse, no matter how minor it is. I emphasize when because we usually all exhibit abusive behavior in one way or another at times. Mistreatment is deadly to a relationship. Stay as far away from abuse as you can. In our busy world kindness sometimes gets left behind. Make love the center of your home. Teach your children to be respectful of others and not to allow others to mistreat them. Don’t think being nice has anything to do with not holding people responsible. Discussing what is abusive and then changing that behavior is the key. The word abuse means action that is harmful. Protect yourself and your family from any dangerous or harmful situations. We really do get what we bargain for so be careful of your choices. This month choose to clean up the abuse in your home. Happy spring-cleaning. Activities Slated for Kids Day On May 13, 2000, Utah Safe Kids Coalition will be participating with over 1200 chiropractic offices worldwide in “Kids Day America/International, a Health, Safety, and Environmental Awareness Day. Dr. Russ Wahlen will be sponsoring the event locally in his office from 11:00 a.m. until 3:00 p.m. at 270 E. 12th Street, Ogden (Gold’s Gym Parking lot) along with the Weber/Morgan Safe Kids Coalition. Dr. Wahlen, with the help of our Weber/Morgan Safe Kids Coalition, will provide essential information on crime prevention, child safety, and environmental awareness. The office will donate special Child ID cards to every child who attends, and the Ogden Police Department will be on hand to provide FREE finger printing of all children. In addition, there will be a special appearance by “McGruff” the Crime Dog who will be joined by Snoball & Dizzy the Clowns, as well as Ogie the Raptor. The Fire Department is bringing their fire truck and will teach fire safety tips to the children. Dr. Wahlen will provide FREE spinal exams and screenings and distribute vital information on disease prevention and specific health issues that affect children. We will also provide free balloons and snacks. There will be special giveaways and prize drawings every half-hour! We have 75 bike helmets to give away as well am as a many fun and exciting prizes. The Weber/Morgan Safe Kids Coalition and Dr. Wahlen will be inviting all of their friends and neighbors to join us at this fun-filled community awareness event! Computer Discovery - Your Mobile Computer Service Summer Computer Classes for: Preschool & School aged Kids Helping Build your Child’s Future!! Colors, Letters, Numbers, Shapes Math & Reading Skills Beginning to Advanced History, Science, Geography, Spanish Keyboarding & More... Now at Old Firehouse Child Care - Summer Course $63.00 per child (reg. $75) For Questions or Details Call Sheri: 589-11515 or 731-66013 801-745-4000 2555 WOLF CREEK DRIVE EDEN, UTAH STORE HOURS: MON. - SAT. 7 AM - 10 PM SUNDAY 7 AM - 9 PM Ace Hardware News.... We can now deliver to your home!! Shop us online at “acehardware.com\southfork” Now you can purchase products online through our partnership with OurHouse.com Simply type in our web address listed above and click on the OurHouse.com logo. Now you can browse through and purchase more than 22,000 products online-all of which can be delivered to your home. You’ll also find helpful tips on more than 100 common do-it-yourself tasks. We look forward to seeing you either in cyberspace or at our store! *Coupon* Totino’s Pizzas All Varieties $.89 cents Limit 3 coupon per purchase Expires 5/30/00 *Coupon* Shasta Sodas Jumbo 3-litre Bottle $.79 cents Limit 2 per coupon Expires 5/30/00 |