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Show Simile ApjhilfQ Let's Go! Jasper 7 am not myself tonight. Joan Then we ought to have a good time. That Got Him Joan Why did your cousin quit his job as riveter? Was it too noisy for him? Jasper Oh, he didn't mind the noise of the riveting, but the fellow fel-low next to him hummed incessantly! inces-santly! Some folks never stop to think; there are others who never think to stop. At the Beginning The medical officer felt that he was not getting straight answers from the recruit, who seemed not to know what illnesses he had had in the past. "Well, tell me the heaviest you have ever weighed," the M. O. suggested. "One hundred forty pounds," the recruit answered. The M. O. made a note. "And the lightest?" snapped the M. O. "Seven pounds, sir," replied the recruit, without blinking an eyelid. eye-lid. Strange, Did He Say? "You have such strange names for your towns," an Englishman remarked to an American soldier. "Weehawken, Hoboken, Pough-keepsie, Pough-keepsie, and others." "I suppose they do sound queer to English ears," said the American, Ameri-can, thoughtfully. "Do you live in London all the time?" "Oh, no!" said the unsuspicious Briton. "I spend part of my time at Chipping Norton, and then I've a place at Pokestogg-on-the-Hike." No Doubt "What's up has she turned you down?" "She has." "Rough luck, old man but don't take it to heart too much. A woman's 'No' often means 'Yes.' " "She didn't say 'No' she said 'Rats!'" Slip UpT A man who had been stopping at a fashionable hotel was paying his bill. He looked up at the girl cashier cash-ier and asked what it was she had around her neck. "A ribbon, of course," she said. "Why?" "Well," he replied, "everything else is so high around here that I thought perhaps it was your belt." What Could They Be? A small girl was entertaining her mother's visitor. "How's your little girl?" she asked. "I'm sorry to say, my dear, that I haven't a little girl." "How's your little boy?" "I haven't a little boy, either." "Then what are yours?" Had Sowed The visitor going around the penal settlement came upon a convict con-vict making sacks. "Good afternoon," said the visitor. visi-tor. "Sewing?" "No," was the reply. "Reaping." |