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Show SMILE WITH SiMS Tho 28 Princeton lreshmen who say they have never kissed a girl don't say what girl. "Sausage Prices Drop" headline. The wurst has come. When a woman speaks of her new BUt these days you don't know if she has bought one or brought one. Laugh and the world laughs with! you; don't and it laughs at you ' A good man Is hard to find." says everyone. "Not as hard as a bad one," say the police. It may not be a hard winter but at times we fotl pretty shaky The, fact that Mr, Will Hays has left 1 them will cause no decline in the post office business. Little brown Jug and little town Jug1 are never empty the same day. How to Find a Wife" Is a new book. Just do something you shouldn't and she will show up. Having nothing e se to break, tho ex-kaiser has broken silence. After days of fierc"- fighting over the bonus bill congress will want to pass one for llself. Farmers quit raising whiskers. Must be in the way under nn auto. Health hint: When a girl promises to be a sister she often means she will be her brother s I ei pi i The man who tried to marry on a hunting license took her for a dear. "Heavy Snow Falls." Canadian headline. What else did the Canadians expect heavy snow to do A woman Is asking I'.O.uuo because her husband was killed Some of them would pay thai much Too much peace Is being made and too little being had. "Crooks are stealing too much." Gays an official who forgets 10 men tion how much la enough Who furnishes the wrong numbers on the new wireless phones? Malekulan brides have two froui teeth knocked out. It must be hard during corn-on-the cob season. of course our ancestors were mon-kes. mon-kes. Didn't a woman make a mon key out of the first man? j "Smokers Doubling" headline. So do people who eat green apples, j Legal tender has a tough time. Ireland is proving she knows how to be free. She Is having trouble with the railroads People who marry for love don t do it ,i'uin soon. I Wouldn't it be awful if the man who names Pullman cars read the Digest's special Chinese number Cromwell said, "Paint me as I am" Women say, "Paint mo as I r m'L" When the worm turns it turns out home brew. Our greatest inventor seems to be an Irishman named Pat Pending. Two of the big meat packers lost $50. 000.000 last year. The consumers didn't find it. The peach crop will be nipped if it wears these new bathing suits. One Indian who isn't worth a cent is the one on a penny. Our real crime wave is our crime waive. There aren't manv strikes among underpaid safetv mat' bet |