Show Dorothy Dix Talks MOTHERS STOP TREATING YOUR 17 YEAR DAUGHTERS LIKE CHILDREN RECOGNIZE CHILDREN RECOGNIZE THE FACT GIRLS OF TODAY ARE GOING TO HAVE BEAUX WHETHER you FORBID IT OR NOT OPEN YOUR DOORS TO BOYS AND KEEP YOUR GIRL FROM DANGER GET hundreds of letters from young girls that tell the same tale OGET of woo woe and ask the same question These correspondents In effect say this r I 1 am 16 or 17 years old and my mother c- c wont won't let me go go to parties with boys boy or per pr permit permit mit any boys to come como to the house houle She treats me as If I was only 5 years old and r c had no right to any pleasure or liberty I feel that this Is very cruel and unjust Un- Un Under Un Under der the circumstances do you think It Is 1 any Pd harm for me to meet boys boy on the sly and go out with them without my mother know know- Ing log of IU It IA 4 A A PROPER moralist would no doubt doubt lec lecture ure these little girls on the wickedness of or deceiving their mothers and tell them that mother always knows best and should always be implicitly obeyed DIN VIX As S a matter of o tact fact a mother who takes this attitude toward her young oung daughter and who tries to rule her with a rod of ot Iron is just as silly and knows just a as little of ot life as the girl possibly can so my words today are not to daughter but to mother The Tho first thing that I want to say uy to mothers Is that In their nearly grown daughters It Is le a condition and Ind not a theory that confronts them ERY likely It t is better that a girl shouldn't have any beaux or any VERY V V thought of a beau until she sho Is a grown and mature woman Very likely she should devote her ber mind to study instead of o having her atten atten- attention attention tion distracted by boys Very likely it is best for tor her to spend her time In fn the bosom of her family and never go out anywhere except with papa or mamma We e wont won't waste time disputing those Issues The point Is that daughter Is going to have beaux Her mind Is full of boys She Is la going to indulge In the pleasures that other girls Indulge In and if you dont don't let Jet her do It openly she Is going to do It t secretly If you dont don't let her have boys come to the house she is going to meet them on the street corners Now mother of or Mary and Sally and Jennie Jenole which do you prefer Which do you consider the safer course 7 OF f COURSE you will say that you have brought up your children F children to obey and that you are going to enforce discipline in your home Possibly But you OU are not a secret service agent who can trail Mary or Sally or Jennie every minute of ot the time and you may be very sure that the second your back hack Is turned and your our watch relaxed your out out- outwardly outwardly wardy obedient little daughter is doing exactly as she pleases and doi doing g It with twice the vim Im and zest simply because It Is a stolen pleasure tenths Nine of the trouble between parents and children arises out of the fact that fathers and mothers sImply cannot realize that their children grow up and arrive at mans man's or womans woman's estate Therefore they cannot bring themselves to accord to their adult sons and daughters the liberty of action that Is their right IN N A MOTHERS MOTHER'S eyes a daughter remains an Infant until she gets married To a man his son Is a boy hoy even after acter he be grows a beard They do not recognize that this age is a forcing house In fn which children come to an early maturity The girl of 17 today Is more sophisticated than her mother was at 23 She is more hard boiled than her grand grand- grandmother grandmother mother Is at 63 Hence Herce It Is absurd to treat her as If It she were a baby and mothers would save themselves many heart hoart heartaches heartaches aches if f they would simply face the fact and deal with their daughters on a grown up Instead of ot a kindergarten plan universal wall of mothers Is that their daughters dont don't con con 1 THE fide In them that they tell their secrets and go to strangers for advice But It never seems to occur to the mother that the reason her daughter does not have heart to talks with her Is because the girl knows that mother will treat her as It she were a little girl girlIn girlin girlIn In pinafores and will veto everything she wants to do There Is small encouragement to tell your our hopes and plans to a person who ho Is s going to knock every one of or them and forbid you to todo todo todo do the thing you want ant to do and tell you OU how generally silly and foolish you are But all of that Is by the way The main point Is that when a girl ruche reaches the crazy boy age you cant can't keep her from knowing boys and going out with them You cant can't keep your daughters from doing the things that all tho the other girls are doing She belongs to her generation IT OT DOESN'T matter whether you forbid her or not nor how closely you watch her she is going to meet boys and have her fling Some Some- Something Something I thing stronger stroner than all your power pov er is urging her on It is the call callot of youth It Is youths youth's Insatiable demand for pleasure and the tha ques ques- question ques- ques question question tion is whether you are going to meet the situation wisely or whether you are going to risk ruining your childs child's life ute trying to enforce your our petty tyranny Dont Don't deceive yourself for a minute Into believing that you are lre more potent than tt the the tte e urge of nature You are not Sally is going to have her boy friends and go out with them whether you approve or not and It Is up to you to make her a deceitful little hypocrite or a frank open minded girl who really does tell mother her secrets INASMUCH as the girl will have bave beaux dont don't you think site she will be bea bea a million times safer It if you OU give her the protection and th the back back- background background background ground of o a II home by Inviting the boys to the house and getting ac- ac acquainted acquainted ac acquainted with them than it if she sho meets them on a secret corner and goes oes oft off with them to God knows where and comes home to lie to you about bout it And how arc are you ou to help her choose a husband It if you do not even know the boys she knows How are you ou to keep her from marrying a drug store sheik that she picked up at a counter because you wouldn't let her receive decent boys bos in a decent way In her own ol home Believe me mothers any girl who has to deceive her par par- parents parent enta ent to get the tho enjoyment that belongs to her hep time of life stands on the tho very edge edgo of the pit and there Is nothing more tragic on earth than that many and many a time It is II isher Isher her own fathers father's father and mothers mother's hands that push her over the brink MANY MANY a girl marries the first man who asks her to escape her mothers mother's tyranny and to try to get a little freedom Many lIany a girl Irl runs away from a dull home and goes to the bad In search of the pleasure that was always denied her by her parents See that these things do not happen to your daughter Remember that 17 Is a skittish age and that If you dont don't want It to bolt you must drive with a light hand DOROTHY DIX Copyright by Public Ledger |