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Show , Costly. "I hope you'll make a tff.od job of this portrait," remarked the multimillionaire. multimil-lionaire. "Ilemeniljer, it's costing me In the neighborhood of ten thousand dollars." "I beg pardon," said the artist. "My price Is only a thousand dollars." Yes, yes, I know that. Hut think of all the valuable time I have lo spend posing for you." A Feminine Egotist. "I consulted a fortune teller the other oth-er day," said t he poor but proud young man, "and she told me I was In love with a beautiful heiress, but she would never marry me. It looks like 1 was up against it !" "Oh, not necessarily," rejoined the fair maid on the other end of the sofa. "No fortune teller has ever ben authorized to speak for me." A Subtle System. "What we want to get." said the editor of the household publication, "is a good series of articles on how to manage a husband." "What for?" "In order to buy all the fashionable things we're going to advertise a woman wom-an will have to have the husband thoroughly thor-oughly trained." Nothing Is calculated to jar a pretty girl like the masculine attentions bestowed be-stowed upon another girl who is homely. Half the world doesn't stop to consider con-sider that It is none of its business how the otlnrr half lives. A soft answer will often turn away the hospital ambulance. Girls should beware of the speedy lover. lie is soon winded. |