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Show Literal. Agnes was being hurried off to bed at her usual hour, 8 p. in., despite the fact that there were guesia In the house. "Why, Agnes, you go to bed with the chickens, don't you?" a vluitor sympathetically remarked. "No, I don't," replied Agnes, re-renting re-renting thla reference to her youth. "I go to bed with Jiiamma." Harper's .Magazine. Tit for Tat "Dear Clara," wrote the young maa, "pardon me, but I'm getting so forget- ( ful. I proposed to yti it night, but ( really forget whether you said yea or ( no." "Dear Will." she replied by note. , "so glad to hear from you. I know I said yoa to boiuo one last night, but I had forgotten Just who It waa" Bed lien. Why Daniel Was Unharmed. "Oaa any of you tell me," the Sunday Sun-day school teachur twked, "why Dan-lei Dan-lei when he waa cast into tho den with tho lions, waa unharmed?" "I can, please," piped the Juvenile who always figures in thla brand of anecdote. "Well?" " 'Cause, teacher, ha belonged to the show." Kverybody'a Magazine. A Decided Change. Dootor You certainly do look better. bet-ter. Ton must bavo followed my aj-vice aj-vice and had a change. Patient Yes, doctor, I have. Doctor Where did you go? Patient I went to another phy 4-vian. 4-vian. Cruel and Inhuman. "I hear that Mrs. Cole, the wife of the dentist. Is suing him for divorce." "Yea. Too bud that he treated her that way, wasn't It?" "What did he dor "She had to have a tooth filled oae d.ty, und When ho got her. Into the (hair and gagged with one of those rubebr contrivances, he stood there aud talked at her all afternoon, refusing re-fusing to give her a chance to answer bark." A Great Invention. The Peddler This is a little device ej-ially diwigned for ue In our t-prlng weather. The Housekeeper What Is It? The Peddler It may be used one minute an a fan and the next to shovel off the snow. His Claim to Fame. "You ay that hard fared young fellow fel-low over there la your most eminent ttl n?" "He uliore Is. Mebbo you don't believe be-lieve It. mister, but that there young f-ller took a spring trainla' trip with the Cirints one year." A Confirmed Pessimist. Appronos of Canadian reclpnieity, N. V. (;oodin 3ld the other day at the Lambs In New York: "But yoa can't rely on Srnator Blank. Blank ts never at!inVd. I visited bis ranch one day and he had th Barst crop -ver saw hjrven'ej. "I knew, though, that Blank would have something to complain about, and. wore enough, when I remarked. This Is a record crop, you lucky rascal!' ras-cal!' Blank frowned and said: ""Yes. bat I'm afraid Its going to be a terrible attain oa the land.'" |