Show 1 I. I Well So This is One Act Play Flap Shows Classroom Life Act 1 Scene 1 1 A like cave-like cel cel- lar The ceiling is arched grimy with the plaster peeling off The light light comes from a square window high up in the right wall T 1 The h e room has the steamy gritty appearance appearance appearance ap ap- ap- ap of a furnace room but buti i I there is no furnace Instead three three- i quarters of the space is filled with school desks much carved hacked and battered through gen generations use Facing these scats seats is the desk of a professor The drab of the room is relieved by numerous numerous sketches water colors and one or two flashy oil paintings hanging upon the walls As the curtain rises the room is filled with students students stu stu- dents laughing chatting and in all the various poses of a class waiting waiting waiting wait wait- ing for a late professor Some are seated some some standing some wandering wandering wandering wan wan- dering about A youth has a girl girlin in a corner attempting to kiss her She coyly resists him ad lib Professor Bunyan enters ad noid A typical college professor he wears a high silk hat and is in full dress Professor Bunyan in the typical ponderous sepulchral tones of a college professor How are are you my students students' The vista of your beatific sunshiny faces faces' is is inordinately inordinately inordinately I pleasant He delicately flips his half- half smoked half-chewed half cigar i into the wastepaper basket Students like chorus-like in the typical typical typical ical collegiate manner Good morning dear professor good morning to you ad nausea The professor skillfully spins his hat upon a peg jutting from the wall waIl an and removes his spats while doing a modernized tap dance Orchestra Orchestra Orchestra Or Or- chestra plays Sidewalks of New NewYork NewYork NewYork York and The Anvil Chorus At Atthe Atthe Atthe the finish of the dance lance the professor professor professor pro pro- fessor seizes a piece of chalk and poses as if waiting for applause Feminine Student Oh aint he hethe hethe hethe the thing Yes Woman I think h hes he's s 's just too cute for words The professor turns a handspring handspring handspring hand hand- spring landing in his chair A group of girls in coonskins ns and skull caps trip to the front of the class doff their coats exposing costumes of silver and andred andred andred red and dance like chorus girls their movements consisting of waving waving way way- ing legs and wiggling hips Orchestra Orchestra Orchestra Or Or- chestra plays Mademoiselle from Masculine Student Boy pipe dose limbs Yes Man Aint dey de cats cat's tonsils tonsils tonsils ton ton- sils I At conclusion of dance chorus I stands as if waiting for applause A wizened student with an apelike apelike apelike ape ape- like face leaps to his feet em Missing Link Lets Let's give three boys Three boys Three for the team boys Everybody ready Rah Rah Rah A loud bell rings Students seize their books and dash for door like a buffalo stampede CURTAIN |