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Show A, Little Nonsense Now and Then. Johnny Papa, will you give me a good, sound licking? Pa What for, Johnny? Johnny Well, I m going to sneak off and go in swimming, and I don't want to be bothered with a future. New Orleans Picayu-ne. Horrible. Practical Father Why did you find it necessary, Elinor, to discharge dis-charge the baby's nurse? Hygienic Mother Why, I actually caught her giving baby a bath in water wa-ter a third of a degree hotter than the physician had ordered. We can't afford to risk baby's life in that manner. man-ner. Bohemian. Consolation Somewhere. They had been husband and wife for three months only when the young wife commenced com-menced to show signs of disappointment disappoint-ment with the bargain she had made. "I am so unhappy," she confided to a girl friend who paid her a visit. "Why, dear?" inquired the other. "I am beginning to think that my husband married me for my money." "Well," remarked the philosophical ! confidante, "it ought to be some consolation con-solation to know that he isn't such a big fool as he looks." London Tatler. "I admit I have the fault you mention," men-tion," said the conceited man, self-complacently, self-complacently, "but it's the only fault I have, and it's a small one. . "Yes," replied Knox, "just like the small hole that makes the plugged nickel no good." Small Boy. Please, I want the doctor doc-tor to come and see mother.. Servant Doctor's out. Where do you come from?" Small Boy. What! Don't you know me? Why, we deal with you. We had a baby from here only last week!" Jack Was yours a long courtship, old fellow? Will Gracious, no. My wife had nine little brothers and sisters! Really. But what difference did that make? What difference? Well, if you had to bribe a crowd like that to keep out of the drawing room every time you went to see your girl you'd soon want to cut short the expense. |