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Show ' The Boston Tramp's Lecture. j (Chicago Record-Herald.) j "I think." said the kind lady, "that you will find work right around the corner ! there." "Madam." said Sauntering Sim, "I was born and bred in Boston. I am sorry that vou used those words. Carelessness in the usb of our'sacred language is to me far more distressing than hunger." "What do you mean?" she demanded with considerable spirit," for she had once been a school teacher and prided herself on her parts of speech. "That little word 'will.' " he replied. "Ah. how often it is misused! Have you ever heard of the lady who fell from the steamship and called 'Help! Help!' " "I don't remember it." she answered. "Well." he went on, "this poor woman fell Into the water, having neglected to inform herself concerning: the proper us; of the words 'will' and 'shall.' It happened hap-pened that no heroes were on deck when she went overboard; therefore her appeals for help were made in vain. 'Help! Help! Help!' she shouted, but no one went to her assistance, and in despair she cried. 'Nobody shall help me: I will drown!' What she meant, of course, was, 'Nobody will help me; I shall drown!' You see what a difference the transposition of those two small words makes." "But I don't know what that has to do with me," the lady said. "Alas!" he almost sobbed: "alas! alas! Why will people who are otherwise fairly intelligent, make such woerui assaults upon our beloved English? You said, 'I think you will find work around the corner.' cor-ner.' Mark the misuse of the word 'will.' If you had said. 'I think you may (or might) find work around" But she let the dog out just then, and the lecture was off. |