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Show Parents' Problems By DONALD M. MAYNARD THE NEW BABY A friend of mine who is expecting a baby is planning to send her four-year-old daughter to her grandmother's when the new baby is due. The little girl will stay a month with her grandmother. grand-mother. Is this a good practice or should the little daughter stay at home in order to feel that she is an important member of the family at a very important time? In my judgment, you are correct when you infer that the little daughter should be kept at home so that she can feel that she is an important member of the family at a very important ory you describe that is, teaching teach-ing and example. There is every evidence that boys and girls are influenced far more by the attitudes, ideas, and ideals of their parents than by those i of associates, club leaders, or teachers. Continue during the early years quietly to instill in your sons the ideal of honesty. Be sure, of course, that you observe this ideal in all your own relationships, remembering remember-ing that your sons learn more from what you do than from what you say. They are both disconcertingly and acutely observant, ob-servant, too. Maintain a happy relationship with them; enjoy doing things together. See to it that your home is attractive, that there are interesting things to do and that they have desirable playmates play-mates near their own age Do not be too disturbed if your sons fail occasionally to see as clearly as do you what is honest and dishonest. Neither should you expect perfection in them. They may feel that you are carrying this "honesty business" to an extreme. As they get older, they may even accuse you of being old fashioned. fash-ioned. But if you are a good sport about it all, if you are' patient and understanding, if you refuse re-fuse to preach or to nag, and if you continue to have enjoyable enjoy-able family experiences together, togeth-er, you may be certain that they never will be able to get away from the ideals you have , instilled into them. time. ' It is to be hoped that the mother and father have talked very naturally in front of their little daughter about the coming com-ing into the home of the new baby, and that she has had some part in planning for its arrival. She will be interested in the clothing the mother is making for the baby, and in the possible name that may be given to it. In the family discussion, let the reference always be to "our baby" so the little girl will have a feeling of possession toward to-ward the newcomer. , When the mother goes to the hospital and during the first few weeks after the baby comes home, it is exceedingly important import-ant that the little girl be given plenty of attention and affection affec-tion so that she will not feel that the baby has usurped her place in the family. Be patient with her if she acts more "babyish" "ba-byish" than usual. Praise her when she shows delight in and is kind to the new baby. Remember that in spite of the best of planning, these will be difficult days for her as it is not easy to be content when mother spends so much time with the newcomer. MOVING TO 'THE STICKS' My husband and I want to buy a small farm but our 16-year-old daughter and 14-year-old son object. They say they don't want to move from the city to "the sticks." Can you advise us? If the farm you contemplate buying really is in the "sticks," and if by moving there your children would be more or less permanently separated from their friends, it is not at all surprising sur-prising that they should object to such a move. They have their friends and have achieved a certain standing stand-ing in the school and in the community. They dread the thought of having to go to a new school and to make new friends. They also are beginning begin-ning to appreciate the many opportunities that the city affords. af-fords. It would seem to me, there- ' If you have a question about your child from infancy in-fancy through ihe teens send it to Donald M. Mayn-ard, Mayn-ard, 810 Broadway, Nashville 2, Tennessee, to be answered through a future column. fore, that you should giye serious ser-ious consideration to their objections. ob-jections. If you feel that they are the result of careful thinking think-ing on their part and not just the whim of the moment, you may want to postpone for the time being your purchase of the farm. After all, two more years will see your daughter leady to go to college, and four more should get your son ready for the university. When they are away from home, you and your husband can go to the farm and enjoy it to your heart's content. There would seem to be another an-other possibility, however, and that is to find a farm that is not so far from the city but that your children could continue con-tinue to go to the same school and could maintain their present pres-ent friendships. If the farm is not too far out, they probably would find that it had a real attraction at-traction for their friends, would furnish them with many interesting inter-esting experiences, and would add to their own popularity. If you could get them to help you pick out such a farm, it is likely that in so doing they would acquire an enthusiasm for it that is even greater than your own. THIS HONESTY BUSINESS How can one combat the prevalent theory accepted by so many parents and children that "if you can get away with it, it's all right?" I am the mother of two sons, ages six and ten, and I have tried to teach them to be honest. Is it a hopeless task? By no means is it a hopeless task, although it is not a particularly partic-ularly easy one. I judge that you already are using the two most effective methods of combating the the- |