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Show MR. JUDD'S PIG. The pretty little village of N_, with its rows of white houses, its streets running parallel with each other, the nicely-enclosed front yards of the dwellings, where in summer may be seen, over rustic porches, woodbine and roses, its noisy milldam and winding river, with its waving willow boughs, its meadow land and picturesque hills for a background, from which, at sunset, the departing rays of the king of day fall upon sloping hillsides and cup the tall church spies with gold, is charming enough to please the most fastidious taste. Like all manufacturing towns, it has a floating population, and sometimes ridiculous incidents occur, one of which I will relate for the amusement of my readers. Employed in one of the factories of N_ were the subjects of my sketch - John Judd and James Vernon. They were neighbors, the two houses adjoining, and good friends. Mr. Judd was a tall stout, red-faced blue-eyed man, whom nature had not favored with beauty; at least, the people of N_ thought so, for whenever anyone wished to be sarcastic or became offended with another, in order to taunt him regarding his personal appearance, he would say, "You are as ugly as Juddie." No greater reflection on a man's personal appearance could be given. Mr. Vernon was a little, meek, dark-complexioned man, whom Mr. Judd would knock over like a nine-pin whenever he became offended with him, not, I presume, to show how nicely he could do it, but to remind him, no doubt, that a man of such superior strength was not to be trifled with. Mr. Vernon was of a forgiving nature, and as John always gave a treat to "make it up," as he called it, Mr. Vernon, after a knock-down and a glass or two of good whisky, appeared to love him more than ever, and would often remark, with pride, ???unreadable??? He'd smash any man, and ask no questions, either." Their wives were good sensible women, attending carefully to their domestic duties, as fond of each other as sisters, not a day passing that they were not in each other's houses to exchange confidences or impart some item of news. In N_ resided a widow, also - a Mrs. Betsy Spriggins, who supported herself and three daughters by keeping a little cigar and tobacco shop. She was a very sharp business woman, and in order, as she said, to circulate money more freely in the long winter evenings, she would have what in N_ was termed a raffle or shooting match, where turkeys, chickens, etc., were staked upon the successful shooting at a mark. Now on one occasion Mr. Judd and Vernon both shot for a young pig, each coming so close to the mark that it was a matter of doubt which was the winner. It was finally decided in favor of the former. To prevent any hard feelings, Mr. Judd proposed to take it home to their wives, and let them have the money for it between them when it was sold. Hannah and Ruth were much pleased at the liberality of their husbands, and the greatest care was taken to get the pig in fine condition for sale. Time passed; finally, as it was nearing Christmas, it was decided to have the pig killed and sent to the market-town of B_, where it was expected it would demand a better price. Mr. Judd and Mr. Vernon resolved to undertake this important mission. A horse and vehicle were hired, and early on a frosty morning they started for B_. The wagon rattled noisily over the frozen road. About two miles from N_, as they were nearing a hotel, Mr. Judd found himself terribly cold, and consulted with his neighbor as to the propriety of stopping to warm himself, remarking that "it was of no use for them freezing of themselves as he could see." They did stop, and found it necessary to drink something to remove the chill, for they were terribly cold, and kept getting colder as they neared each hotel they came to, until at last they became so happy and comfortable that they allowed the horse to select his own gait. Going rapidly up a steep hill, the tail board of the wagon fell out, and the fine porker, not being well secured, and owing, doubtless, to the attraction of gravitation, fell out also. The two men's minds were occupied with other things more lofty. Mr. Vernon was singing a song, while Mr. Judd would clap his hands frequently to applaud, so their loss was unnoticed by these happy friends. Presently B_, with its bright spires, snow-capped and glittering in the noonday sun, appeared in its beauty before them. They were not long in reaching the fine market house on one of the principal streets. Mr. Vernon nimbly alighted, Mr. Judd fell out like a log, and rolled over on the pavement, to the great amusement of some small boys; but he did not care, and even laughed himself when he gained his feet, (he being good-natured), though the laugh was against himself. When they came to look for the porker, imagine their dismay to find it gone. They stood for a few moments gazing at each other in speechless astonishment. They both accused the other of not properly securing it. At last Mr. Judd became so enraged that he struck Mr. Vernon such a blow that he flew over like a top on the sidewalk. The effort was too much for Judd's agitated feelings, causing him to lose his balance, and he fell upon his adversary, and there was a grand commotion created by the by-standers, attracting the attention of the police, and our two friends were taken to the lockup for a breach of the peace, a fine was imposed, the horse and wagon taken to the livery stable for safe keeping, and the affair talked over by the citizens of B_ as a good joke. In the meantime, the day with its home duties closed in, and Ruth, after putting her little ones to bed, took her knitting and went into Hannah Judd's to watch with her the return of the business men. Hannah's kitchen, with its pretty rag carpet, its snowy tablecloth, upon which stood a tempting supper, its bright coal fire glimmering through the grate, its kettle with its column of wavy steam, well trimmed coal oil lamp, on either side of which, on the high, old-fashioned mantel-piece, stood two highly-polished candlesticks, looked cheerful and inviting. The two women seated themselves opposite each other, by the polished stove, and whiled away their time with the following conversation: "Did you hear, Ruth, of the great revival goin' on at the church? Old Simpkins is caught at last; the Lord has got a terrible sinner in the fold. And Sally Maria Spriggins she's taken in meetin'; no more paintin' of her cheeks now, as she did to catch Dr. (Doctor) George Taylor Noodle. Lawd he's not smart to marry in such a family, but you see he went there amusing of himself; but Betsy, she's a sharper, she just gave him to understand she'd allow no flirtin' or foolin'; so he had to do the square thing or stand aside, and he was nabbed afore he knowed where he was. And there's no end to the airs Sally Maria has been givin' of herself ‘cause she expects to git a doctor, and the whole family are well-nigh crazy about it." "Well, I am surprised, Hannah, ‘cause you'd have thought a genteel-lookin', respectable man like him would ha' wanted a lady for a wife; but there's no tellin' what fools people will make of themselves, partickler when they're not over-wise. But Betsy has been tellin' around that they are related to some big families, (but they won't see it) and in the old country to the Duke of York." "Law me, Ruth, don't talk nonsense! There's many a mile between her and the old country, and she can be all she's a mind to, and who knows the difference? Related to the Duke of York!! Wouldn't he split his sides a-laughing if he'd see his relations? Better think of the time she went out washin', and not be claimin' relationship with big folks that won't look at her. But don't you think it is time our men was a-comin? I'll peep out a bit." She opened the door and looked about into space. Above her she saw the stars glimmering like diamonds in their azure setting, for a clear, frosty night favors the kindling of the stars; the wind blew fiercely around the ???unreadable???, but there was no sign of their return. She closed the door and seated herself in silence, looking ruefully at the untasted supper. "Don't fret, Hannah; something's happened to keep ‘em, and it's a long seven miles to B_. They are good men, their only fault a little too much love of rum, but they'll get over that by and by, I'm sure. So kind of ‘em to give us the money for the pig. What are you going to git with yours? I'll buy a nice clock, and if there's anything over, some toys for the children for Christmas. It'll make the little chaps so happy!" "Well, Ruth, I'll get a set of china dishes, for Martha Ann is a good girl, and is beginning to have company now and then, and I want things to look a little decent like, so that she can hold her head up like that pert Sallie Maria Spriggins. Besides, I am expectin' of the minister to tea, (sich a good, wise man,) and I don't want old cracked china to set before him. La, me! I forgot to tell ye old Mr. Gonigle was dead, s'pose we'll both git an invite to the funeral." "Don't say! How did it happen?" "Well, he'd been to the tavern as usual, and come home drunk, late at night; when he got to Bond's spring he opened the door and walked in, thinkin', I spect, it was his own house, fell in and was drowned; next morning he was found dead as a mackerel." "Dear me, dear me! What will become of her and all those children?" "There's one thing, Ruth; I am very anxious to git our men into meetin'. Once there, Parson Jones will not let them git back in the world again. I coaxed Judd to go with me last Sunday, and there was not a more respectable-lookin' man in meetin' than him, with his Sunday clothes on, so Mr. Swallow, the deacon, said to me next day. I said, "indeed!" I am no-wise inclined to take it as praise, for where will you see a handsomer man than Judd when he's dressed up?" Ruth was silent, not inclined to express any opinion, lest she might give offense, not being an admirer of Mr. Judd's personal charms. At last she said: "Hannah, it's not the church will save ‘em, for you know Jim Brown? Well, Mrs. Bunting left her clothes out, one bright moonlight night, thinkin' a good freeze would whiten ‘em; well, In the middle of the night she heard a noise in the back yard, and looked out, and there was Jim takin' the clothes off the hoe! Her husband would ha' shot him, but she begged him not to shoot a man of God. No! I think the church a great reformer, and have great faith in the preachers of the Gospel; but the grace of God must be in the heart before sinners can be saved. At last Hannah interrupted Ruth by saying; "I am terribly worried; I think they'll not be here to-night; it is now midnight; we'd better go to bed." "Very well," said Ruth. "Do you think anything could have happened? Maybe they got robbed or murdered! Many men have lost their lives for less. But we'll trust. Good Night; we'll see what good news the morning brings." The next morning they were handed a notice from the authorities at B_, stating that their husbands would not be released until such an amount was paid, etc. The poor women wrung their hands in despair, for they were without money. At last the kind people of N_ took compassion upon their helplessness, and raised the amount, and thus enabled them to go after their delinquent husbands. Hannah and Ruth returned with them and though the day was exceedingly cold they resolutely passed each hotel without stopping, the two women sitting bolt upright in the open wagon, looking very cold but stern, the men meek and quiet, and I believe the latter did not feel the cold, or they would have said so. Poor Martha Ann did not have the china dishes to entertain her company, and I've no doubt Sallie Maria Spriggins is still giving herself airs of superiority. And Ruth has no clock, and the little, rosy-cheeked Vernons were disappointed in not getting their Christmas toys. What became of the porker I never ascertained, for whoever found it must have been born of a secretive nature, or a person who minded his business so well that he kept it to himself, and the world, it appears, will ever be in doubt regarding its fate. - Waverley. |