Show Laughing at at His Movies Is s Making Sennett Fat hall He He- Quit Making His Comedies So Funny or or Immolate Himself on Altar of Adipose Tissue i By E. E M. M NEW lEW YORK July 29 A A dismal ligh gh rent the sylphlike figure of Mack lack ennett ennett a anear near convulsive sob shook Jis is slight frame A furtive t tear ar rolled J own own his delicate peach blow cheek I of a Furtive Tear I. I Instinctively we offered our hand- hand kerchief kerchief to to save the rich New Jersey rug from the flood it was in the palatial of ot the Keystone Film Foundry Foundry- were busy assorting laughs into uge piles Demure maidens classified Idles oles of smiles Husky guys Shunted guffaws and snorts of merriment ito receptacles kept for that purpose was a busy scene in a busy factory factory- But Mack Sennett looked the em- em of veritable under- under woe a woo a ker's kers assistant in the first thrills of ofis ofis ofis is least profitable funeral lOur Our expressive eyebrows questioned ur ar journalistic victim He Ignored use us Ve r e e gesticulated pleadingly with the tip f our nose He disdained ar it r overtures I What seems to be the trouble trouble we finally Trouble Trouble Compared to toy toy toy y woe trouble is a veritable Jag of y y-it y it isn't trouble trouble its its it's far far orse Sennett Sand and he ew himself into the folds of of ofa a mor- mor co-bound co arm chair lit a 1 cigar ken cen from a solid gold case cape threw a a. ai 00 Panama into a waste i and sighed again Then his l gaze wandered across the theay theay theay ay to the Knickerbocker hotel We decline gently and all that but cline nevertheless 0 to divulge why he zed Sufficient be It when we menon menon menon men- men on casually and en passant assant as they they the y in Camden that we too looked However comma we were not to be by any such subterfuge specially as the shade across the way as pulled down So we went to the theare are arre once more like the hero that we are or is it Is-it It depends upon ones one's grammatical state of mind Please please we pleaded pont dont tont keep us In suspense What ails alls you Is it cubism or ethics ethics' or Just plain Anguish was registered in his bis face Thrice he essayed to speak His hands trembled so that the friction of the air roughened his otherwise neatly nay niftily manicured nails I r fear fear fear- he started Fear not we consoled con oled we will protect you 1 I r fear he began again From the convulsive workings of his face we too feared that feared that he had swallowed the pit of something Gosh he exclaimed only he didn't say gosh I fear that Im I'm getting fat There its it's out The skeleton in Sennetts Sennett's Sennett's Sennetts Sennetts Sennett's Sen- Sen nett's Innermost recesses is exposed to public view view and and you know how much mucha a motion picture man dislikes publicity For years and years and years that's three years continued Sennett evidently relieved by his confession the girls have envied my shape Corset Corset Corset Cor Cor- set manufacturers have hilve written asking for or testimonials thinking very naturally natural natural- ly that my exquisite form was due to their remains And now woe now woe Is me met Every day when I 1 arise I view with alarm as the political platforms say my mortal remains Armed with a sextant a compass and a yardstick I Itale take tale measure Gritting my y teeth I force myself to ascend a scale Woe II I woe woe woe Im I'm getting embonpoint embonpoint embonpoint embon embon- I point 1 It It isn't as bad as that that that-it It cant can't be we consoled him now knowing until later when we had discussed the matter matter matter mat mat- ter with a dictionary what embonpoint embonpoint embonpoint embon point meant f I I Sennett as He Was o 0 oAs As He Am or Is First Episode The Dirty Work Why dont don't you work hard we asked that will reduce your embom- embom pomp A yearning look entered the soulful eyes of the He reached for foran foran an iron paperweight Nervously he grasped a paperknife Work Vork Work I get to the studio at half past something in the morning and stay until twelve hours later j I work work work and when the work is done I T work some more I map out I III II every scenario although I have several severa I assistants who help me But the main work devolves upon me I sketch In Inthe inthe inthe the work so thoroughly that any competent competent competent com com- director who Is not In the de defective defective defective de- de class can produce e the tho play And kind sir we ventured who thinks up p those crazy Keystone stunts the the hair raising feats the feats the funny situations the situations the etc Say Mr Sennett broke in a person of the male persuasion who admitted shamelessly that he produced comedies for another concern Im threatened with a lawsuit and want your advice Is Is this situation new I Having order ordered d the persons person's remnants remnants remnants rem rem- nants removed with a vacuum cleaner clean clean- er Mr 1 Sennett admitted that he de devised devised devised de- de most of the Keystone situations himself I r am always glad to get suggestions from those who work with me and I give iv public credit where it Is due for forit forit forit it encourages But nut I am a strict disciplinarian disciplinarian disciplinarian dis dis- nev nevertheless If I set the hour for tor work at 4 In the morning morning- They brought us to with a a. glass of I water If they had brought us two two two- well we would have drained them foam or no foam I never force an actor or actress to todo todo todo I do anything hazardous I ask them whether they want to do the work and If they decline their refusal does not work against them Of course ac acceptance acceptance acceptance ac- ac of ot the task aids them ex explaIned explained explained ex- ex Mr Air Sennett in reply to an another another another an- an other of those half baked queries We work very hard hard eight eight companies usually us us- but but I 1 have not yet been arrested arrested arrested ar ar- rested for fop homicide so it it is evident that I 1 am more or less humane As Asa a matter of historic interest I may say that we have a a. swimming pool which Is at the disposal of our em em- and other amusement devices such as work And what line of policy So o you follow follow follow fol fol- fol- fol low we asked for want of something better to say Mr Sennett held himself himself him him- self in check or he would have replied Straight life Ure or endowment The policy of not permitting the public to get tired of ot us he explained For Instance we wc had a run on the Keystone cops They are gone into the discard for we had reached the themore point where the public would have been more more or less justified in growing tired of their antics antic We Ve change our policy every three or four months In that way we escape tiring the public Eleventh Episode Exposed I IA A A. A faraway look the features features features fea fea- tures of the comedy man man man-a a sort Rort of for remembrance look with look with doleful sighs Our tender heart stirred with sympathy sympathy- or something Were still here we we- suggested going to be fired now we added knowing the symptoms from cruel experience I was thinking of the good old da days s sighed Sennett Ten years ago when I was still young and beautiful Continued on page 7 1 LAUGHING AT HIS MOVIES j Continued from page 6 6 when when the world had had so much in store for me when me-when when all al earthly joys were mine when mine when the birdies sang and I 1 I worked for fifteen per week week then then began began began be be- gan my motion moton picture career such as asi asit asit it i Is I 1 had been an actor in vaudeville and in burlesque I 1 had even been in Shakespeare but I am trying to live lve that down You see sep my family thought I was a respectable second story man In reality realy I was assisting in Hamlet t. t I 1 would not have that known for anything anything anything any any- thing for fear that the estate of ot the late Shakespeare might sue me for de defamation de- de or mayhem or something something And our thoughts flew few back to an historic night in the town hall hal In Kimberley Kimberley Kim Kim- berley South Africa Afria where the diamonds diamonds dia dia- dla- dla monds come from Barney Barnato miscalled the diamond king had Just fust arrived from London where on the streets of he had earned honest farthings doing In those days it i was Barney Isaacs not Barnato But be that as it may Barney Barney Barney Bar Bar- ney appeared in and as Hamlet That Thatis is why we looked morose and prematurely prema soured to this day You see we had paid two and six pence admission admission admission sion and we wanted our moneys money's worth no mater what the tho agony And here be it s said id that If I Sennet played Hamlet Ham Ham- let let and and the evidence is is' not conclusive he he could not have played It i tithe a-tithe as badly as Barnato there is a limit to even Sennetts Sennett's genius Sixteenth Episode Honi Sol Mal Mai Pense Qui y Pense Again Sennetts Sennett's Sennet's vision drifted across to the hotel hotel So did our own We Vc sat Men came and men went Tempus kept on The shade was drawn again We resumed our conversation We have almost finished an eight- eight reel comedy drama featuring Mabel Normand It I is her first attempt in ina a picture of this length but hut she has talent and youth and looks in her fa Ia- vor Our conversation drifted to another comedienne who shall remain name name- less but who costarred with wih Chaplin v vin in Punctured Romance Romance Marie Dressier Dressler said Sennett and Sennett and right here we call cal you to witness winess that it was Sennett and not we or us that mentioned Sennett the ladys lady's name Marie Maria Maie Dressier Dressler made a huge success and I hope hove that Miss N Normand will wU duplicate duplicate cate It i. i Again AgaIn a reminiscent look came over Sennetts Sennett's Sennet's expressive face Jace Silently and ad expectantly we waited Keystone is four years old It I was wason wason wa waon on July 4 4 1912 that w we took our first first- picture We Ve went over to Fort Lee Lee v vWe We Ve had no studio for our capital wasn't much more than And when we wanted to picture a bedroom or ora a 0 parlor we borrowed furniture placed it i on the lawn and thus combined combined com corn Interiors with wih atmospheres We have improved some since then and hope to do still better in the future We Ve were comfortable in the huge chair which a valet had placed at our disposal disposal Ebony slaves stood fanning us A box of fragrant stogies stood on ona ona a table table out out of our reach Fascinating ing ho ris with wih eyes of of the gazelle flitted to and fro with stenographic notebooks In their dainty hands Haroun laro lIar Har- lar- lar o oun n al never had nothing on cn onus us he didn't Glad to have seen you ou excuse me- me m Ive I've Ive a directors' directors meeting Intoned the voice of Mister Sennett Sennett We Ve came to with a start and started for the door Hope you get double fat we exclaimed exclaimed ex ex- claimed as we bolted A snarl of fu futie futile futile fu- fu J i ithe tile tie rage echoed down the corridors ot of the Longacre b building mocking sneering sneer sneer- ing fattest fatter fat fatter fattest it sounded Anyway heres here's hoping that Sennetta Sennetts shadow may never grow less |