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Show NOTHING SERIOUS y Dan Valentin t When it comet to pretty girls, you cant beat th west! . This statement comes from Robert Ruark, nationally- syndicated columnist,- who- has made a career of pretty (iris. Mr. Ruark has seen them all. He's -whistled at pretty girls from North Carolina to Seattle, Wash. Be has helped hold ap the front of pool rooms in Washington, D. C as he watched the aretty (iris (o by. Be hat gled in New York, smirked in Philadelphia, leered In Chicago. And, after all this basic training in all parts of the country, he still maintains the girls in the west an the best Although he is a native southerner, hailing from North Carolina that's spelled No'th Carolina, sun! he thinks the much publicized southern belles are an overrated bunch of tomatoes. "What's a southern belle got?" he asked. And he answers: "Nothing, absolutely nothing. A southern belle usually has a lot of frizzy hair sticking up all over the place, and she usually wears a couple of pounds of cheap jewelry. "But western gall theyndifferent!" Mr. Ruark went, ea is explain, warming up to his subject, that western girls are big girls. "And blj girls are the kind of gals 'I love," he added. However Mr. Ruark has to admit that Salt Lake City doesnt come in any better than second in the western girl sweepstakes. "I hate to say this." be drawled, "but I will have to give the western nod to San Francisco for the best-looking girls." But he said Salt Lake City has the second best looking girls in the west "When I'm hen a little longer, I might change my mind, ha added. "Research is a wonderful thing!" A Quaan's Quaon Joha Mooney is a man who can't be bluffed when it comes to poker playing. At least, that's what Charles Nelson says. To pnve his point, Mr. Nelson cites a recent card gama la which ha aad Mr. Mooney plas several ether card addicts wen grappling with lady hick. The pot grew and the playen stayed. Mr. Nelson raised and Mr. Mooney upped the ante. It was a tough hand. Finally, Mr. Mooney who had more spirit than, money, had to give in. "What you got?" be asked Mr. Nelson. "Queens," Mr. Nelson said. "How many?" Mr. Mooney wanted to know. "One," Mr. Nelson retorted. Mr. Mooney threw down his hand. "Well, at least yea weren't Huffing," he added. ear Old Grandmother They're even changing the story of Little Red Riding Hood. A glance through the latest Little Red Riding Hood edition reveals that the wolf doesn't eat grandmother these days. In fact, tha latest revised edition haa grandmother getting away from the big bad wolf by hiding tat the closet -. M Back la the old days, the wolf actually ate grandmother, and .. the woedchopper rescued Red Riding Hood by hacking off the wolfs head. Things an sure tame these days. Sam, tha Sad Cynic, Saysi When Vice President Alben Berkley gets married to that widow it will be time for all men to weep for the Veep! |