Salt Lake Telegram | 1934-04-25 | Page 4 | Walter Winchell on Broadway

Walter Winchell ON BROADWAY BROADWAY- Genuine Drama The locals just returning from Holly think this is very cry amusing but I dont It strikes me as being rate first tragedy It is supposed to have actually happened recently at a cocktail party part when a Hollywood gossip writer for the ma magazines walked into a garden of a home and encountered a movie actor and a woman necking Oh exclaimed the actor please dont don't say anything about this It would ruin me Dont worry I wont won't sadly replied the col- col my wife Anything for a Laugh One headline the other da day went thIs way Congressman Poo Buried Beside Son and in came this suggested epitaph Poo 1 In Fewer Words By Olin Miller Note to You writers cant can't fool the reader he knows whether youre you're just trying trying try try- ing to write or really have something to say The movie producers overestimate our dumbness which is something we cant can't do for them Another advantage of keeping silent is that no one can misquote you The average dinner after speaker a gives us a hazy outline of what he intends to say b doesn't say it and c repe repeats it Gag The closed here hit After Deep Purple a the coauthor Wilson Vilson Mizner followed it to San Francisco for its opening there Hel He came to be hailed as the local lad with P Paul Armstrong who set Broadway on fire The first night in the foyer he overheard his brother an attorney talking to the critics The show is marvelous his brother was saying uIt It amazes me Mizner swelled with pride Finally one critic q queried Just what is is there thereabout thereabout about this show that makes it so good Mizner's brother that UIt It amazes me me replied it took two apparently intelligent men to write I one such lousy play I Caught Up With Him Recently a local deputy lire fire marshal was sentenced sentenced sen- sen to Sing Sing because he was involved in inan inan i an arson ring Soon aft after r arrival there the former fire official went into the thc prison barber shop lathered lath lath- ered cred himself as is the custom and sat in a chair waiting to be shaved He looked up at the inmate barber razor in hand who was looking at him intently Then with witha a terror stricken scream he ran from the shop The barber is doing 50 years there because a afew afew few years ago he was the victim of the fire marshals marshal's marshals marshal's mar mar- investigation and testimony Nice Story They tell of the time Gertrude Stein author of uNo No Sense in Three Acts was studying philosophy at Radcliffe e Hall The late Professor William James brother ot of Henry was At exam time Gertrude had to prepare a paper on philosophy She just wrote I dont don't feel like writing about philosophy today and turned it in James sent back a note saying I often feel that way myself and gave her an A The nest Best Are on B Vay Jack Benny took a trip to the Bronx Zoo Ge he told a friend they have some awful snakes up there I Did you OU have to go away up there snarled the friend for that