Show r I j i SELF SELF- SELF CENTERED CENTERED MAID r i LOOKS FOR CAUSE OF J. J FEW ABIDING FRIENDS G. G i l N t J According to Emotional Makeup of Average Boy and I f Girl One May F Fall Il as Deeply in Love as f JJ Other Cause of B Bashfulness i 4 I i iBy T By BETTY BLAIR 1 Y t l An inferiority complex usually means that the person L possessing it is as wholly absorbed In self as is 15 the one who 5 j 1 Is 15 afflicted with a superiority complex The negative qualIty qualS quality S ity of the first Is destructive to progression The first step stepIn In treatment is to banish thoughts of self In a hobby or absorbing ab- ab proJect i Ti J I Dear ML Miss Blair I have come to you with the he k age old problem of ot how I I. I can an make people like me I am 17 i years e rs old but all allS S j my life have beenS been S 11 told I act ad older a A I than my age I Iam Iam I I I HS am quite short for formy I m- m my mase age ase and a few ew ri I- I I people say I 1 am fat Others say I II Iam I III 1 f am just right and I I I that curves are n A coming back in J style I do dont don't l believe everything ever everyone every every- 5 one cne tells me but here are some rome of ot the things I have been told 5 Youre the best besl looking girl in j town What i if you jou ou are arc fat S youre you're lots lols better looking than the rest of us u.s. A boy friend says You have pretty lips A girl girlfriend friend says You have pretty prett hair and its it's easy casy to wave According According According Ac Ac- cording to other friends I have pretty teeth a beautiful neck neek And the one boy tol told me I had hadIt NIt NItI It but didn't know how to S use we it if Do I sound swell headed or conceited conceited con con- 55 S Ive I've been told that thal I am S Ive I've also been told I am very ladylike ladylike lady lady- like and quiet In fact I am so ro S quiet that when I am in a crowd they all aU forget I am there I h have havea ve a sense of humor a good imagination imagination imagination tion and n ca-n can make wisecracks and can keep my closest friends well ent entertained when I have a S talking streak on r t But Bur a lot of ot good all this is is 7 doing me when I can cart cant t keep a aboy S. S boy friend The girls arent aren't overly Interested in me either cither Ive I've heard that you have to be interested interested inter inter- ested to be interesting but I dont don't think you have to go falling all allover over aver ev everyone to let them see you like th them themI m. m I treat everyone with civility even people I dont don't like but I never make a fuss over anyone S 'S I used to think It was because J t I was fat no one cared to be seen tt t with me then I wondered if the t reason I never had any boy boyfriends 2 o friends was because I I never letany let T t any of them kiss me Some of or the boys I have gone with have liked me very much one 1 I amure am sure fn ure n particular When he tried S to kiss me I said Dont dont don't d do that But he did anyway He S. S later apologized but that was wiS the end of ot his coming to see me All this has res resulted in my ray having a L terrible Inferiority complex I have bave often wished that I were were S S dead I dont don't cry very often nor or j very easily but sometimes I get getso j 5 so discouraged and everything is isso t so hopeless and useless that I just have to cry Please help me If 11 r you ou can BLUES I have read the pages and pages S ef of t manuscript you sent describing yourself and your troubles Surely you must have felt better after unburdening un burdening yourself so completely You may have an inferiority complex but the reason for it is that your thoughts are almost wholly for tor in and about yourself And they arc are mostly destructive thoughts thought For example you cant can't reconcile S yourself to the thought very matter l of factly that yo you are fat and a little short for Your age and that It would i be a good plan to do some scientific research into the study of calories and how by reducing them and still stil 1 keeping a balanced diet you could I produce streamline effects But yo you I must g go finding a niche in your mind yoI I for every complimentary thing peo pee people pIe have said about you and whether peer r S you believe it or not you hope it wasY was wa S Y S.- all aU true and dwell upon it Such i thoughts even for the most beautiful I girl in town ar are wholly destructive for tor they center attention on sel self Nothing is more apparent than the theS S conversation and mannerisms of a self self centered entered person erson and nothing is so boring Cant Can't you for awhile f forget all about yourself forget you are fat or short beautiful or homely popular or unpopular and begin to Interest yourself in something really worth wOrthwhile while S In reducing your letter to more printable proportions I left out the statement t that at you hated children Letters question and requests re requests re- re qu quests for lor advice ce should bould be addressed to MISS 1 BETTY BETY BLAIR HEARTS HEART'S HAVEN VEN TELEGRAM SALT L LA LAKE A K E CITY Write legibly upon only one side of the paper It I 1 M necessary that you append append append ap ap- ap- ap pend the rl right ht name and address address ad ad- dress will be held in strict confidence and will not appear in print Questions Involving In 10 In advertising information information I tion lion cannot be answered but ut as a matter of ot fact childhood I is isone S one ne of or the most interesting of ot ages It t is m my suggestion that you throw yourself heart and soul into a project a hobby of or some kind and nothing could bring greater returns than t tomake to make lake y yourself useful to children Of Ot fer er your services to an organization L whose aim It fl is to help develop chil chil- dren ren Study books on child o ogy g gy Read childrens children's stories stories- so ro you yot Ou 1 can an tell them in an interesting man man- ncr ner er t You can become so wholly absorbed I in i n so great greal a cause causo that thal even though I returns may seem cem slow the effort t to t o make them show more rapid pros progress gress ress can take your mind wholly r from rom yourself But whether It be t through children hildren or some other ab ab- s interest you must do some some- t thIng hine to to take your mind from your our self or you will develop into int an emotionally unbalanced person no none noone noone one ne will love Though deep Interests I It in n which yo you become wholly absorbed t to o the thc exclusion of self sell others c cameo come came me meto t to o love you deeply and sincerely This is I s a sound round psychological truth which you yOU yOUcan ou can apply to yourself it if you try remember the thc world would move on n just the thc same if it you or I dropped out ut of ot it tomorrow and that we must bestir ourselves to do something worth orth while before that time comes IPAR COMPARISON SON Dear Miss Blair Does Docs a boy oy usually fall tall as hard for tor a girl as she does does' for lor him V S. S When a boy really falls In love with ith a girl the thc d depth of othis his affection affections Ls is s probably as deep as the girls girl's speaking peaking generally But Bul Individual cases ases will differ according to the emotional emo emo- ional makeup of each It might easily happen lappen that a girl who was emotional to to the point of instability would think hink herself head heed over ears ars in in love with ith a bo boy and that the boy whose emotional motional characteristics were more s stable table able was very d deliberately sizing up p the girls girl's characteristics and tern tern- and letting his head work with his heart to tell him whether or r not he was truly in love But research re re- search search earch o on the question shows there isn't much difference in the love life lie ot of f the average boy and girl girt or in the he way love affects th them m. m T TO OVERCOME BASHFULNESS Dear Miss MiM Blair How can one overcome bash SHY By self-discipline self that makes one S overcome fear One is bashful because because be be- cause ause one has a fear of speaking his thoughts a fear as to how they will wille I be e received a fear of ot the opinions opinIon of t other people a fear of ot himself Make Vlake yourself do the things you fear over ver and over again and you soon I will learn there is no cause for fears o of f any kind WHO SPEAKS FIRST Dear Miss Miss' Blair Will you please lease settle an argument argument ment and tell me mc whose place it is to speak first a girls girl's or a boys boy's Thank you RUBY A girl has the privilege of speaking first but real friends do not consider r this his point of precedence Either Eithe r speaks peaks spontaneously and perhaps a at I the he same time the other does when I I he e is within speaking distance I |