Show MR DOOLEY ON ONE I I ADVANTAGE OF POVERTY I 1 ELI ELT sir said Mr 11 I WELL 1 I Dooley Doole ye ought to be J ww glad yere not sick an i iV V V at th Ui same J time I Hows s that Mr Hennosy de dec I c je ye e we saId Mr Ir Dooley sup s p L IJA I iR t tI I I 4 5 y 4 11 i iI I I I 1 I IL L I I b p 1 I 5 C f cp ClIP 1 DOOEY 0 CO CUT cur UP TERRIBLE UNDER THE RE H cHLORY FORM IN C N SONG ONe S SWEll fl 1 HU T 11 J N FK FR lUcy JUCY LUC J fl 4 pose ann happens to ye now a fellow a hammer on Yf ye e th day ilay th picnic or di ge tion listens to a walkin rm th Union Iv lv an goes out cut on Th on th corner has th the usual suspicions among an hits ye over th head he d an un calls th wagon an MInds ye Je home Th ThE E god od woman wrings her hands an calls to witness that If It ye have a ye wake th neighborhood au 8 slaps a lL mustard on cia n ye If It i Ehe the tomes comes back later an finds ye e put th sheet between ye an anth anth th an gone to sleep she knows Us an ls s rr Tr th doctor We e to have hae doctors In what th Ui calls caUs th Jo JoanIs wards anIs They live five above aboe th thO store an practice on oz us Th ar q surgeons o are all lon town edlUn th the do romps s to a while In a bugg buggy On th way up he sets eth a broken eg removes an arm does a little some something thing f fr r th city takes a talks poll with th thO un unhappy happy happ parent an finlly lands at yer dure with th burglars tools Alther hr hs s closed that dure th UI secrets Iv th the thinner thinner inner man is known ony to him No wan hears or wants to hear anything about it Th Tb nex time we see ye ye e come ome out lookin pale an an much younger an lookin thin anny wan iver seem ye yr an arther a while ye JC observe that thin ye I start to tell telI now how manny mann hei it took an what ye see whiny y smelled th dizzy sponge begin gln In to sprint away An ye go back to wurruk Ye Te flyer niver hear ann wan say sa is great corn com rny he begins to talk about his 5 knes kne i Ive se set seen n men turn rm a aP arr P rr ir helpless invalid to tolI lI tt n to a man about th Nic Nb ar l oan anal canil But with th thO great ns far tar I In ie IP often thanked th thO Lord that I t in 1 was sas as Iv 1 me precinct fr with th the e i Iv sit aU u th as asH H ll lIgan gan says sa s on me I cud niver e I P DUNNE I I th pleasure Iv a moments sickness I without people In know knowin In whether me liver was on Sickness Is wan Iv tv th thO Iv lv 1 th thO poor man that he shares with no wan It comes kindly to hIm thO th four AN walls alls Iv ty his room closes In on him like a tent folks goes by on th other side aide Iv th thO th rollin mill disappears an with th fit mornin comes no honest days tile He lie lies there in blessed Idleness an no mat matther matther matther ther th the matther with him he dont suffer half halt as much pain as he In iv two dollars a day 1 I a man who ho used to take his that way others wint off fr to hunt what Hogan Hogun Hogana calls a Us th finny tInny iv th deep he become Ill an took to tobed tobed tobed bed It made mad him very But suppose e I resigned iv me I was defeat defeated ed cd If had happened to me meed ed up th W ap ani seer See fn news rs about th capon can Iv th tb Twin Iv th iii Sixth ward He H Hhas has hag ha brain fever feer He has not He got Into a fight with a Swede an had his ribs stove in n He tell fell out Iv th lii window iv i 1 a store he v was as an broke th Ui left junction iv hr th thO cartilage Th with th Is he too much A man iv lv his age who has been a soak all his life always succumbs to anny like iv h th cranium Doc thor Muggers dean iv h th thO Post Grad yate yale School Iv Osteopathy says he had a similar case las Jas year in Mr Haitch HaUch Clohessy wan Iv th tn best known citizens iv this city Like the cap Mr Ir Clohessy was a high liver iver a heavy heay a gambler an ana ana ana a flirt Th cases eases are almost Identical Ow Owin in to th tb code iv lv ional Dr Muggers cud not Dot tell th bereaved fam what ailed aUed Clohessy but It TV was as undoubtedly his Past Life Thin come come th thO doctors Not wan doctor to give ye a whiff out iv lv a towel an make ye sleep fr an hour an wake w ke up an say I 1 fooled ye je do ye begin No but all ai iv thim They Th y escort th prisoner up th thO in a chariot an th thO little news newsboys newsboys boys bO run ru alongside sellin pa papers papers papers pers Our night edition will wili print th Ut inside facts about Cap condi tion an th Cap with a cine cinematograph Iv th Ut jolly be Dock What happens to th at first Is th same as If Ir he was a man But that is I done an gettin so aiby aisy ais they tell teU me not much difference diff ence be tween a good an a surgeon th tb wurruk begins Ye think Us all allover over ye say Dock put Y er hand th thO pillow an take what J there But not so Th docks adjourn to a 3 large hall hail an prepare th story iv Cap Dooley Doole a Stormy Career Be Wan Who Knows Upon seem th Ut Cap we at once I diagnosed th thO case as or chicken bone in th Ut throat Dr Pincers operated Dr Smothers th Ic Ie Dr opened th window Dr Anodyne turned on oi th gas path turned th tt 13 th w wall ll Dr Rambo looked window Doc Doe thors thor Peroxide gl An Antip tip reen an took teak a walk in th Ut park an Salivate SaH late figured up th Ut bill SHI As w we e have said we diagnosed i th case above aboe W anft th Ut name It dep on olIh how yr th Ut syl 81 syllables syllables came out Iv hat at We were wrong rang although alu what we see we weI j I got in more thin made up u f fr r th thO error error We Ve made a long incision th chin down an another an annot not what we but manny things that ought to be kept th thO we put th Ut Cap back an wInt on n Th was a complete success Th ThI wretch Is res tin an ant easily We have given gien him a light meal iv I pickles an antiseptic oats an sur surgical surgical science havin done its duty dut mus leave th thO rest to nature which was not In th consultation consult tIon beta bein b ln con be some iv h us slightly Irregular Irregular irregular lar Signed Look at our ur names Pincers Rambo Bambo Smothers rs Peroxide Muffins l geen Anodyne j But If Itye ye think I ye e ud like to keep up v look f fr r it In th Ut tact facts Is stated on th Ut authority author y iv lv wan Iv th thO surgeons Cape Cap Dooley D oley cut up terrible under th tho sinsin songs an askin f r Lucy Hi His I name is She was nas In th thI I room It seems they have had h d Th Tb room was poorly fur fUl Th Caps Ca s clothes was as much worn as aa was most iv him He lIe must have led a a life It I is doubtful dou If he will iver f fr r rhe he Is very very old He has been his age f n fr r manny years e He is il a a abbey no lory ous profligate as was well shown be th view we had bad Th Tb flashlight pitcher iv tv th Ut Cap will appeal to tc all who wh know lc his Inner S An HAn there ye arr a jt Think iv lv iva a man comin out in th light lightly iv day all that hat He cant get geto on clothes enough to i cover over him He may m y bear hear himself with a haughty manner but he feels that ivry hrry man nian he meets lows knows k more about him bun thin he h knows Th TIt fellow on th has been within th walls Hes sayIn to t Yere a hollow sham composed lb iv i im impaired impaired impaired paired organs an antiseptic gauze To th end en if his lif li bell beH niver be bf anny ann thing more thin aji l chart to o his hi His i aa ig 1 over ove fr ir fr tr what good ca c ri to th It blinds blind Iv his hl bed room If l body knows exactly th the size shape an a location lo Iv his bis spleen No sir if Ive got to be sick lek give InC me th Iv poverty I IT dont want anny man to know more about bout me thin he can larn tarn th thO handiwork Iv Marks MarkE th tailor an anO Schmitt th Ut shoemaker an th thO deceitful expression iv h me face If It I have hare a bad heart let him know it be beme beme beme me eyes es On Ori me vest yest is written Thus ThUg far an no farther manny a aman aman aman man on intimate terms with th Iv h that dont know anny more about me inn thin that Im broadcloth on en an serge on week days An AnI I dont they shall I hide behind th privileges iv me position an say Fellow citizens docks an journalists I cannot ye to th Inner Man Hes Hs a an to Hes modest an shy an ob objects objects objects to callers callera Ye can guess what hat kind iv i man I am but I w have havee ye e know An I can do that th t as long longas as I stay slay poor Im glad slad lad Im poor said Mr Hen Hennessy Hennessy Hennessy nessy It gives ye less to talk about but butmore butmore butmore more to think about said Mr l r Dool y Copyright too by b Robert Howard Rus Russell Russen Russell sell sen i Critchlow Jack took a whirl at the indicator in the Press club benefit game and although we like him per j we never saw a man fall down worse on low balls We Ve must do Jack the justice to say though that his judgment on highballs is all aU right Dick Whitte red mail wagons I are beauties Dick never has been par particularly parti particularly ti noted for his fondness for mails malls males until since he got b t the I contract for carrying them from the depots to the postoffice Dick old boy we wish you OU all the success in the thew I world w i 1 There w was s a wild rumor on the street I th other day to the effect that Jimmy Hogle had Invited a large crowd cr wd to have Hae something on the house Of course we ran Tan it down at once and found it to be absurd Mr ef secretary Mr M John Quillan ex ax exploded exploded the story and nearly nearl died at the foolishness of It It does loes beat all how these things get out outRe Rev Re John T Axton asks us to kindly deny en the report that he boxed a friend ly setto with President Roosevelt when in Washington a few t w weeks ago It was a go gos s |