Show mw YORK O K LIFE Some Warm Warth Weather Stories Related Belated by the Wits New York Post The owner p v er of r a small yacht has ha in his bis employ a Finn who acts in the double capacity of pC f cook and deckhand and whom he e bad always regarded as single The Xh other day the Finn ad admitted admitted that he had a w wife ife and two boys in Finland for tor or whom he proudly boasted he recently purchased a 00 house DOUSe out ont of othis his earnings as a sailor Why your our wife Vite live liv over here her asked his employer Veil sir she sh dont agree e the was w s the response In the th summer um 40 er this man m n a south southerner southerner 1 erner living in New York bias hies him small town in Jersey and andrev rev revels reveta eta els in its imaginary magin ry bucolic Ufe The Theother Theother Theother other day dB he engaged a 1 very ery respectful colored color d mn to cut the grass s in itt front of the cottage c That night upon returning from train the city he paused aused to watch the colored man gathering up his tools in lazy fashion and asked him where he be came Fm Richmon sah sab an I doan like it up hash heah at all Why not the suburbanite asked lit MIt coss cop too much mach I doan know how Id iI ev e ever er a got on on ef e I r sent home homeIer fer Ier things I gits em to do all my down there Las year my cos me 90 so cents I sent it 11 ithome home three times Umes In q barl deed dee J 1 I Idid did Slowly he gathered his hi mower scythe and sickle and when he was about moving off of he stopped abruptly and said My folks doan know Im grass up heah beah deed they doan they think Im in gome me big S S S 3 When one sits down to a meal for which he be himself Is responsible through his skill I as asa a huntsman or fisherman the th joy of or mere vulgar eating is supposed by many to have ha reached its pinnacle For those who are not too inquiring a form of enjoyment ap approximating approximating approximating the real may ay be had bad at a certain restaurant here her in New York On the lawn flanking Hanking this house hoise Is em embedded embedded embedded bedded a Dool 1001 of fresh water stocked with the most toothsome brook trout tr ut The wishing to part with 1 50 for a u mess of the speckled beau beauties be beauties u ties has the privilege of angling for tor them and of or seeing his capture a few minutes later temptingly placed before him ready r ady to In be eaten The illusion is tS complete to the uninitiated but oth others others ers erg more skeptical have learned that after the trout are caught they are im immediately Immediately immediately mediately and carefully unhooked and restored to their element and the wares of a local fish dealer substituted on the broiler J The diminutive man man was determined to follow the precept of the song and get his worth The be moment he be reached the luncheon counter he grabbed a piece of Qt che is 15 the word from the dish placed there for those who eat cheese with sweets Then he be grabbed another piece then then 5 two pieces and they were gone in an instant He took the cheese with a fine flourish as if he did not care car are who w ho saw sa him Soon he got his tongue sand w Ich and a glass of milk and this thi was indeed ind d his opportunity Again he tell fell upon the cheese dish tooth and nan this time with furtive glances to right and left because at least one man was wal watching him with great amusement But this did not deter him in the least He went on devouring cheese piece after alter piece utterly neglecting his sand Und sandwich Finally he broke the sandwich In two and using as a safe de dc posit proceeded pr ded to hide beneath it all the cheese he could c uld take out ut of ot the disk Then he got to 18 slip sUp ping the yellow ellow cubes beneath ben ath the rim nut of or the plate Certainly he must have eaten a pound of ot cheese suffering much discomfort the while sneaked the pieces toward him Slime glanc lag ing In about In the most guilty way way ROn How H w he be had room for the tile sandwich and milk is i a mystery 44 S S There is or rather was li a new slot dot Jt machine It appeared in iii a museum but is now laid up tre re repairS pairs The inscription was as Drop a Penny in the Slot Press the Button and See ee a Wild Mad Dance DanceA r rA S A C typical East t Side Sid spicier i i was the first victim of or record He produced the copper coin dropped it into the slot lot gave bave the button a vigorous push and a d promptly executed a mad dance dan There was a stout needle concealed in inthe Inthe Inthe the center of the push button and the pressure on this button besides Ides send end ing t ug the needle into the finger exposed a mirror In which the victim could see his contortions The he spicier kicked the machine to pieces and threatened to bring de tie delang gang lang and clean out the place it if the proprietor resented its destruction destructionS S 4 S 1 If you y u were In the vicinity of o the general postoffice and wished to go 0 to the Zoological garden in the Bronx how bow would YOU ou set about making the trip was asked of a candidate for ap appointment appointment appointment as patrolman in the course of ot the official civil service examination Id rd ask a policeman the applicant naively recorded his reply c 5 A instructor in civics 9 years of age was wa rehearsing the greatness of the president when he was interrupted by one of his hearers bearers a little girl of 5 who said sald gently but with a certain air of reproof God made mad the country he only lets President Roosevelt run it |