Show ODD COMPARISONS The Difference Between the Christians Chris-tians and Musselmans SOME INTERESTING RESEARCHES The RichtcstWroiigest AVrongcstRightest Lp slIed DoWu sIded Right sided People Known CoxbTAXTixoiLE April H ISSJSpecial Correspondence of TIlE HCKALD There are many differences between Christians Ikflnd Mohammedans besides the former believing on Christ and the latter on Mohammed An observer in the east will I mark the following more or less IKOMIXCNT Ult1CnHl TIC or differences from the west Christians worship God Musselmans Allah Christians go to church Mussel j ins to mosque Churches have steeples mosques niinerets Churches face the east mosques the south Christians go to church and look to the cross Musselmen go to mosque and look to the caabla A Christian honors his church by undressing his head a Musselman his mosque by undressing un-dressing his feet A Christian chapel has line pews and bare benches a Mohani inedau mosque the bare floor and line mats A Christian sits in church a Musselmau stands up in the mosque A Christian gentleman never goes to church only on important occasions a Mohammedan lady never goes to mosque except on special events A Christian gentleman always loves to sec women at his church a Mohammedan Mo-hammedan gentleman never likes to see them at his mosque Rich and poor Christians Chris-tians do not often mix at church rich and poor Musselmans always do so at mosque in other words churches have their reserved re-served or hired places mosques have none A Christian prays loud so that hi s fellowmen may hear a Musselman prays low so that they may not hear The Chris ttan prays looking up the Musselman looking down Tic Christian prays holding hold-ing his hands up the Musselman holding them down Most of Christians do not pray at all to get at work most of Mussel mans Aral many times a day to get out of work Christians sing at church Mussel nr ans do not at mosque Christians pray Afjttle and preach much Musselmans preach AiUle and pray much Christians invite sinners and unbelievers to come into their IhuivhPs Mussehnans refuse to allow them to enter their mosques A Christian Chris-tian has his dead Jerusalem a Mussclman his live Mecca Christians have the Bible Musselmausthe Koran The Bible reads from left to right the Koran from right to left Tilt BIBLE BEGINS n the front of the book the Koran in the back of the book Or in the words of a Mohammedan Miyjtia priest with whom I lately argued The Musscluiens book begins be-gins right the Christians wrongleft Christians desire to either sell or give the Bible to unbelievers Muss lmaus will neither give nor sell the Koran to unbe livers Christians desire the Bible published pub-lished in many languages Musselmans the Koran in but one the Arabian I language The Bible has divisions of chapter and verso the Koran has none The Bible is written bi man but indited by God the Koran is written by God so Mussulmans cay but indited by man < so I say Chris tans send out i many missionaries to preach the Bible Mussulmans send very few to preach the Koran Christian missionaries arc always highly learned the Mohammedan Mohamme-dan missionaries poorly learned Christ Chris-t Mis spend much money for missionary erk Mussclmaus very little And yet strange to say Christian converts arc very few Mohammedan converts very many un Africa for example So Mussclmeii argue The Christian religion must be very bad and the Mohammedan religion verj good The Christian governments rule the churches the Mohammedan churches rule the governments Christians have many sects Mohammedans very few 1 Christian wears a head dress with a brim a Musselman one without a brim A Christian gentleman wears pants a Mohammedan Mo-hammedan a gown A Christian walks a Musselman waddles A Christian turns his toes out a Musselman turns his toes m Christian has straight legs a Mus selman bow legs broucht on by a singular custom of bandaging while young to give more freedom in the crotch and by continual contin-ual sitting crosslegged on the floor i IIKISTIAXS WHEN WALKIXO Oil DRIVING turn to the right Muss eimans to the left Christians have but one wife and many public prostitutes Musselmans have many J wires and no public prostitutes A ricn Christian has his hired mistresses a rich Musselman his hired men A Christian greatly honors woman but does not fear her a Musselmun fears her but greatly oishonors her The Christian loves to show his pretty wife the Musselmau hides his The Christian and his wife occupy the Jxme sitting room the Musselman and his irives have separate rooms A Christian wIfe may call her husband lack a Mohammedan Mo-hammedan wife must call hcrseffcntll lord The Christian wife can siton her slap s-lap the Mohammedan wife must sit at her husbands feet The Christian wife smooths her husbands beard the Mohammedan Moham-medan wife washes her effendd feet The Christian wife looks up with loving eyes the Mohammedan wife casts her eyes down with modest looks A good Christian loves ta be at home rather than at his club room the Musselman loves to be at his cafe rather than at home The Christian gentleman gen-tleman loves his family with open love the Mohammedan gentleman loves his with J secret love Many Christian gentleman drink intoxicants few Mohammedan gentlemen gen-tlemen do so The Christian gentlemen smoke very short pipes the Mohammedan gentlemen very long pipes Christian women do not smoke Moliammedau women do Most of Christian women have big feet most of Mohammedan women little feet Christian women wear shoes with long tops Mohammedan women lowtopped shoes or slippers Christian women wear stockings with stripes running around the leg Mohammedan women with the stripes running up and down the leg Christian women love dresses cut low in the neck with extra long skirts Mohammedan women extra short skirts with the neck cut so high that it hides the face CIIUISTIAN WOMEN WEAK OnCTi und have small waists Mohammedan women wear no corsets and have large waists Christian women pad Mohammedan Moham-medan women do not Christi in women love white teeth and finger nails Mohani inedan women red teeth and finger nails So the Christian women paint white the Mohammedan women dye red Christian I women ride horseback il a Fmneattci the I Mohammedan women ride donkcyback al a Arab So of course a Christian lady I must have her own saddle a Mohammedan lady can use her husbands Christian ladles have pretty faces Mohammedan ladies hacwell they have got pretty faces too but a Christian lady loves to < how her pretty face to man always being very modest with her feet and legs a 1 Mohammedan lady much dislikes showing her pretty face to man and is extremely careless with her feet and legs A Christian Chris-tian womans tongue is poison to be listened to a Mohammedan womans tongue is I poison to be seen Christian women go out riding or walking with men Mohammedan women with women and eunuchs Christian I Chris-tian women go to theaters and balls Mohammedan ladies never do Christian i ladies are educated and rule man Mohammedan j Moham-medan ladies are uneducated and man is I ruled by them Young Christian ladies j seeks their own beaux young Mohammedan Moham-medan ladies i have theirs sought for them I I Young Christian ladies dance with young I men and young Christian gentlemen with i iroung ladies young Mohammedan ladies I dance withladies and young Mohammedan gentlemen with gentlemen Christian i children say mamma mamma Muse Mus-e man children annaanna In school Christian children sit on high benches and read low Mohammedan children sit on the floor and read loud Christian children mast learn to read or write from left to j n wright Mohammedan children from right to left CH1I1STIAX CIIILnUEX HAVE STEEL PENS Mohaminedian children wooden reed pens Christian children may use ruled paper Mohammedian children must use unruled Christians write on desks Mus selmans on the knee Christians eat from tables Mohammedans from the floor from large trays Christians use knife and fork Mohammedans use thumb and fingers in eating Christians use metal spoons Mohammedans wooden ones ChrIstians have seperate plates Musselmans all cat from one Christians cat pork Moham inedans do not A Christian sits on chair and crosses his legs a Mussclman on the floor and crosses his legs A Christian shaves his chin a Musselman the top of his head A Christian salutes a brother with one hand a Musselman with both A Christian is buried so as to rise facing the east when resurrected a Mussclman so as to face Mecca Christians use one calendar Mohammedans another When it is 12 oclock Christian time it is 0 oclock Mohammedan time varying with the season For fear of wearying I will close with I the following summing by a Christian Musselmans arc the Tightest wrongest wrongestrightest most up sideddown sided downsidcdupside tho most right sided left sided left sided right sided people that ever can be found on the face of this big round earth But cant Musselmans say the samc about Christians One or two things are common to both however which ought to be mentioned The same sun shines as brightly on Chris ians as on Musselmans and the same moon as modestly shines on Musselmans as it slyly peeps down on Christians God or Allah I Allah or God knows both Chris ii and 1i cl tines Musselmans The comparisons made are probably as new as they arc novel but are however perfectly reliable being gathered through extended and careful observations and being certified to by a number of Mussel mans of intelligence JAMES CLOVE |