| Show 22A The Salt Lake Tribune Sunday October 14 1990 7-ELE- Florida Judge Partial to Double Standard Lead Story Broward County Fla Judge Paul i Marko in a July divorce case e Marianne Price 33 from haying boyfriends over to her house (be t cause it was formerly joint property) I but said her husband could have the t "entire (Miami Dolphins cheerlead- ing squad running through his apart- ment naked" because it was "his" i "k 17 for-'bad- A 06"k 074 " - P ' '' 1 9 News 11'4 44t S?I'f I of the Weird Chuck AU apartment Marko then advised Price to start visiting singles bars: "I've been in them I'm a single man There are all kinds of bimbos 0 and If guys running around in It'' shirts with eagles on their open : chests There are great guys out r there" Marko said he would order I Price's house sold if she allowed a male to live there: "I don't want her tcall of a sudden taking up with some nice ' sweet little blond from Nor- t way" Marko later apologized to 'P Price Compelling Explanations r' voy k! Shepherd — Ottawa Ont waitress Cindy Havens 30 had her crime down- graded from trafficking in marijuana to possession after she explained to a judge in July that she had such a large quantity on hand because it seemed to be the only thing her pet iguana Pogo Longtail would eat (The judge then mused aloud whether his ruling would cause a run on iguanas at local pet stores) — Jerry A Cameron missing for five days in August after leaving his Jacksonville Ark home to go fish it 1 unl""aullmau -- klilletanslammemmumill EARTIT RES - Simple Ways to Save the Earth American workers throw out the equivalent of more than 1500 trees — recyclable letterhead sta- tionery memos copier ok paper typing paper and com- puter paper — Every Week They don't seem to realize they're ' I' t I : V A::t V yi t i t INK4e ? ing away mon- ey as well as re- sources Office Pi 4 1 4 ! ' throw- - paper is - ': '- N' ‘ 1 14 I Kio 1 John Jayne ex- - tremely valuable It's the highest grade of paper and the easiest to recycle because it's made with strong short fibers that hold up well the second time around So recyclers will usually pay pretty well for it I Businesses can often make a profit — in addition to saving the cost of garbage collection — by selling it Does your office recycle its paper yet? Maybe it should Recycling Facts — We throw out about 85 percent of the office paper we use — enough to build a wall of paper from New York to California It could all be recycled — It's estimated that office workers in New York City throw y out some 600 tons of paper every day — Recycling office paper conserves resources Every time we recycle a ton of it we save the equivalent of 380 gallons of oil and 7000 gallons of water What does your office use that can be recycled? White Paper — It includes: white computer paper stationery (letterhead and bond) and copier paper Note: Not all mills accept paper that's been printed with a laser printer Check with your local recycler — Envelopes are fine unless they have plastic windows (rip the plastic out) — Staples and paper clips are no problem but remove larger metal clips and fasteners — Non-papitems like plastic cigarette butts polystyrene coffee high-qualit- iiK? 0 i:1:!)k cups etc absolutely must be kept out of the white paper bin Colored Office Paper — Check with your collector or recycling center to see if you can add it to the white paper Sometimes you can't because the fiber has been dyed You may have to recycle this separately it's still worth the effort Computer Paper (Green Bar) If you only have a little put it in with the white paper But if you have a lot keep it separate Don't Recycle: — Anything with adhesives This includes Post-I- t notes and mailing address labels (the "pressure-sensitive" ones — if you lick it it's OK) Tear the labels off — Fax paper NCR paper (carbonless copies) or blueprints they have chemical coatings Talk to people at work about getting started soon The bottom line on office paper recycling is that it's a good deal for everyone —especially Mother Earth Sources — "Office Paper Recycling: An Implementation Manual" A detailed booklet on starting an office recycling program available from the EPA Office of Solid Waste Management 401 M Street NW Washington DC 20460 "Your Office Paper Recycling Guide" An excellent booklet from the San Francisco Recycling Program 271 City Hall San Francisco Calif 94102 Cost: $5 make checks payable to the City and County of San Francisco (If you have questions or comments about our environment and what you can do to help please write to John Javna in care of Earth Works PO Box 419149 Kansas City Mo 64141 Because of the volume of mail John is unable to reply personally but will address issues of general interest in the column) (Now available: "50 Simple Things Kids Can Do to Save the Earth" by the Earth Works Group To order please send $695 plus $150 postage and handling to "50 Simple Things" Andrews & McMeel PO Box 419150 Kansas City Mo 64141) ing near Little Rock called his wife from Denver to announce that he had been "kidnapped by Mexican bandits" left in the water near Amarillo and had his money stolen — The Miss America Pageant Organization ordered an investigation of the director of its Texas affiliate B Don Magness who reportedly had a long history of making lewd comments to contestants (such as refer ring to them as "sluts") Answered Magness: "While I make an attempt at appearing to be a dirty old man I make double that attempt to make sure I'm not Some of the girls just need to be dirtied up a little" — Anthony Zielinski member of the Milwaukee County Board of Supervisors proposed in May to give the government the authority to sell the vital organs of indigents when they die "If they can't help society while they're alive maybe they can help while they're dead" He later withdrew the proposal Smooth Reactions — Grocery store manager Abdullah Shaheen was arrested in Ft Lauderdale in July for pulling a loaded 357 Magnum on three young girls when they came up two cents short to pay for bubble gum — Gyoung Kim 35 was charged with assault in July in Edmonton Alberta for beating the owner of an adult boutique who would not give him a refund for the inflatable doll he had bought earlier in the evening — Following a Senior Little League game in a Chicago suburb in August two coaches of the losing team (father and son) were charged with beating up John Hill 46 coach of the winning team — Edward Biafore 29 barricaded himself in his parents' home in Meriden Conn for three hours one evening in July holding a SWAT team at didn't w when-runninglo- want — Former NBA player Allen AR Lea-ve- il pleaded no contest in May to charges that he choked referee Pete Quinn into unconsciousness follow- ing a Continental Basketball Association game in March because he disagreed with a foul call — Two Western Michigan University professors (husband and wife) were under investigation in April following an exam incident According to reports when the husband discovered a student cheating he grabbed the student in a headlock while his wife bit the student Won't Take No for an Answer — Marvin Carter 18 was arrested in Silver Spring Md in March after he had burglarized a sporting goods store After he had set off a burglar alarm he retreated into an air duct where he hid for more than 36 hours before testing an exit to see if police had gone (They were waiting) — Yu L Yang 27 was arrested near St Louis last November when he locked a county health inspector inside his restaurant after being informed the inspector would cite Yang for storing food improperly Said Yang to the locked-u- p inspector "If you are here to give us trouble we'll give you trouble too" (Yang then proceeded to trim his fingernails with a butcher knife while the inspector watched) sprermumquaktyin thenameyouknow' a !: 1 - 1 ti------------ I GALLON o 1 0 S11(01 infAllak 1 (3 ' ELEUEn Send your Weird News to Chuck Shepherd PO D 57141 Washington DC 20037) ("News of the Weird" by Chuck Shepherd John J Kohut and Roland Sweet with more than 500 of the funniest weirdest true news reports of the last 15 years is available in paperback Send $695 plus $IM postage and handling to New American Librory PO Box 999 Bergenfield NJ 07621) Universal Press Syndicate Box The sign of the times: 11111111 ( TICE A YEAH! snuluos FOR rvIEN cli:11 MEN ICE c RIDS : TODI7H TI 1101'm 0 0 U 0 Li ItE 0 1990 John Jovna fill CEEB & ALL DEMill JEr3S ($15 AND OVER) 0 1 0 14' L ""11-- NTT Me lace bay with a small arsenal after arguing with his stepsister during a cal-lopizza order Said Biafore's gir- lfriend "He mushrooms" UEll 0 TAKE $3 OFF ALL SWEATERS $14 & WIDER 0 1: 0 "11N t: a (I COATS ANDIJACIETS iiTD PRICED AT f' 9 TAKE $30-$4- 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