Show News for single parents i I playing g games ames with your r-l r T. T dates is is a good idea idea H submitted by b Bernadette Astorga Astor a in single parent life most of ofus ofus us s will once again find ourselves playing the dating game While some single parents find dating easy others like myself become terrified I remember when I dated in high school and my worries were of what to wear what to say and whether or not to let the boy kiss me goodnight or or worse would he even try While these elements are still in place for dates as a single parent a whole lot more now must be considered There is also the task of finding a babysitter for the younger children so you can go go out Then you get the third degree from the older children when you return You become aware that your dating habits will be setting an example example example ex- ex ample for your children to follow Most children have fears about a parent dating They may think that this stranger strange is taking away attention time and affection that belongs to them However it can also produce a happier single parent who approaches time with the children with greater energy and cre creativity than the single p parent who is not gathering good feelings from other adults The children m might also feel that they are being disloyal to the absent parent if they find they too enjoy being with the newcomer newcomer newcomer new new- comer in their lives Children can be helped to understand that they dont don't have to replace a parent but they can add someone special al if they like Since my childrens children's fathers are not active in their lives I was faced with the opposite problem My children quickly became attached attached attached at at- to any man I dated and were emotionally emotionally emotionally emotion emotion- ally crushed when th the relationship ended If I broke off the relationship the children were angry and resentful that I had blown it Usually the relationships were broken off because as I got to know the man I realized that we just weren't compatible Sometimes it was because of extreme difference of opinion over religion I I go to church he didn't want me to to-or to or because he wanted me to change to fit his ideal of the perfect woman These t tare are things you dont don't learn in the beginning of ofa ofa a relationship because both of you are on your best behavior or you are too afraid to ask office received which r Recently our a game could be the answer answer to these problems Getting to Know put putout out by Gam by-Gam Games s Partner artIer r ship Ltd Inc is designed for two people in inthe inthe inthe the early stages of a relationship It has unique questions that stimulate conversation and provide a relaxing fun atmosphere The questions questions questions ques ques- are thought provoking and are not sexually suggestive Each card contains an appropriate appropriate appropriate ap ap- ap- ap quote or funny saying relating to the question like Give an example of something that you would not s settle for unless it were the best and What positive qualities have you inherited from your parents The way your date answers the questions can reveal a lot Jot about him Based upon discover that he your dates date's answers you may will expect you to lose weight change habits or be a doormat The object of the game is to tobe tobe tobe be the first person to go around the board The winner receives a selected pre prize which is isan isan isan an activity chosen by the winner and arranged arranged arranged ar ar- ar- ar ranged by the loser There are several prize l suggestions such as a picnic in the mountains mountains moun moun- attending a sporting event together or couples can cao make up their own activity While the game may answer many of my problems dating still terrifies me But that's okay because the game is also a great way to get to know your children your best friend or r co In fact Getting to Know is used in high schools to teach students how to communicate On a recent camping trip my year old son played the game with his friend and they hey were really surprised at how much they did and didn't know about about- one y another Getting to Know is a great communication communication communication com com- game If you would like a game of your own they are available in many game stores or you can order one by calling 1 Adapted from the newsletter Miss Mom Mister Mom r S F |